How do I fall in love again?

Question

How do you fall in love again after a failed acrimonious relationship. Is it possible to "jump in" and forget about the consequences of a possible negative turn to the romance? How can I do that, How do you do that? Please someone tell me?

Answer 1

I don't believe in love anymore.

Answer 2

Falling inlove doesn't have any "guidebook" or "how to" guide. It's a risk just like everything else in life. You win some, you lose some. Whether it be acrimonious or not, what matters is the learning opportunity that you get out of it. Because definitely after such failed relationships, you get to learn and therefore become wiser. Forgetting the consequences actually is two-fold: you forget the pain but don't forget the experience, it is through these experiences that you would know what to avoid next time. I cannot tell you how to fall in love again, because you know yourself, your circumstance, your unique experiences and you have your own standards. The point is, the next time you fall in love, just make sure you leave something for yourself, because there is no such thing as "absolute". Make sure that you don't "lose" yourself in the relationship. Because it has and will always be a two-way thing. Another thing, you should always realize that a relationship will always have its natural phases: like the "romantic phase". It is during this phase that people are still blinded by each other's heightened feelings of romance that overwhelms your conscious selves. After some time, this wanes and you notice each others' frailties and imperfections, realistically, are the both of you mature and willing enough to accept each other as to who the both of you are and compromise and grow in that relationship? It's the same with marriage, the wedding celebration is just a phase, but after that, REAL LIFE bites you in every place unimaginable and make sure you're not caught flatfooted. Falling in love is a part of life, there are risks and therefore consequences, how you react to these consequences is entirely up to you. Just keep it simple and realistic, because most of the problems in relationships are borne out of each others' wrong decisions or choices. Just be responsible for each of your choices and be tolerant to each others' pet peeves. A relationship is also not a personal mission for the both of you to change each other. Take it as it comes, because life is full of inevitabilities, just look into the good things and enjoy each other's company despite the unpredictabilities of life, which acutally makes it more mysterious and exciting.

Answer 3

There's good news...and bad news, I'm afraid.

First, the bad news: you're not going to be able to forget what you've gone through - not without some serious brain trauma, at least. This is going to effect your behavior when it comes to future romance.

The good news? It's something that can be worked around, however.

The old saying about finding love when you least expect it is true - and has been for a long time (which would explain why it's an old saying, wouldn't it?). Don't go out and try to date. Don't even go out and try to "forget", either. Neither of these does any good...because deep down you know better.

Instead, go find some event or activity where you'll be around other people - perhaps even some people you'll wind up interested in. Better still, get **involved** with these activities. Take up a hobby, get into charity work, whatever it is that floats your boat...learn to play guitar, take a yoga class, it really doesn't matter. The point is to get out there, and put yourself in social situations where dating isn't the primary reason for being there.

Once you're in such a situation, you'll find that you build connections to the people there with you, and that relationships might just develop from that.

....and, lo and behold, you're suddenly not so alone - or worried about where the relationship could be going.

Answer 4

Well, you have to look at each relationship (or lack thereof) as an experience and try to learn something from it. So you look back at your past relationships and analyze why they were bad for you and why they were good for you. And don't make the same mistakes again. Then when going into the new relationships - you have a better sense of self and what you want and what you need from a relationship. Once you find that, you are better able to cut the duds from the real deal and it will be easy to fall in love. But be cautious and selective and don't give too much of yourself until you figure out that the person you are with really has the potential to give you what you want and need. Have fun though.

You also have to realize that a lot of times people break up because the expectations between the two people are different. Which is another good reason not to give to much until you and this other person are looking for the same thing and are on the same page.

People often fall in love with the potential of a person and who they want the person to be - so it's hard to let go of the idea that you have let sink into the fibers of your brain. But once you realize that the person you were in love with and the person you were really dating were not in the same body - you can learn to move on more quickly as well.

Good luck.

Answer 5

What you can do is learn and remember all of the mistakes you have made in the last relationship and try not to do them again.. Everyone has gone through this. The best thing is to work on yourself and try to get over the last person, by staying busy and getting into hobbies, change yourself alittle bit by getting a new hair cut, or buying some new clothes to fit the new you. Get rid of everything that reminds u of the last person. Maybe have a couple one night stands if that helps (doesnt help everyone) Go out and meet people , but when u meet people take as a new friend then a new lover cause then they might think u r desperate. Once u find that connection again you will know, but it always happens when u least expect it. Remember time heals... If this person did not work out, there always be a better person waiting for you and they will treat u even better then the last person!

Answer 6

From the question and the explanation you have given clearly shows that you are not consistent in your love affair. You are fickle minded. Love is divine ,it has no boundaries. If you skip from one failure to the next where are you going at this rate. First introspect yourself and find out where exactly the fault lies and find a solution as to how to patch up the broken affair ,if it is really the fault is on the opposite party you try your best to convince and bring the other party to your line of thinking and put an end to the acrimonious relationship. The parting should only a last resort. You need the strength of character to accept the defeat.

Answer 7

You can't just "jump back" into a new relationship. With any failed relationship you are going to have memories that will carry over, and hopefully mistakes will be learned, and not repeated.

If the relationship went really sour, take some time and reflect on it...it's part of the healing process, polus it helps you rediscover who you are. Huh? Well, if you have been in a long term relationship, you are mentally used to having someone. If you jump into another relationship too fast then all you are doing is substituting for what was missing in your life. So...take some time and learn about who you are again, and in that you will heal.

Then you will understand the difference between your wants and your needs...and Mrs. Right will become clearer to you. ; )

Hope this helps.

Answer 8

The thing you have to take away from every relationship that has failed is that you have learned something, maybe a flaw in either that person or yourself, see if there is a pattern. Don't give out I truly believe that there is someone out there for everyone. Don't forget about your past relationships but do let it haunt your future love life either, Even though you are probably hurting right now, just know that one day you will wake up and realise I doesn't hurt anymore or as much. Don't let this make you bitter and alone either, no man is an island.

Answer 9

Well, after a relationship, I wouldn't be too concerned about how to fall in love again. I would be more concerned about letting go of all the emotional baggage and becoming a healthy, well-adjusted person.

Sometimes dating new people opens your mind to the possibility of being in a committed relationship again. The most important thing is to focus on the new, not the old. Look at it that way. Your failed relationship is old news. I don't know the details so I don't know if any trust issues were involved, but a failed relationship does not mean that you and someone new can't make each other happy.

I hope your focus is on yourself and getting back into the dating game. It's important to maintain your confidence and know that other women will want you and be fully satisfied by you. When you get out and meet new and interesting women, enjoy the experience. If you're open to finding love again, eventually one of those women that you meet will feel the same way, and you'll be in love.

Get back in the game... meet women, and enjoy yourself. No one can teach you how to fall in love.

Answer 10

The best thing is to work on yourself and try to get over the last person, by staying busy and getting into hobbies, change yourself alittle bit by getting a new hair cut, or buying some new clothes to fit the new you. Get rid of everything that reminds u of the last person. Maybe have a couple one night stands if that helps (doesnt help everyone) Go out and meet people , but when u meet people take as a new friend then a new lover cause then they might think u r desperate. Once u find that connection again you will know, but it always happens when u least expect it. Remember time heals... If this person did not work out, there always be a better person waiting for you and they will treat u even better then the last person!

Answer 11

You don't just jump at any relationship just to have one. That will not help you to get over the pain. First you need to take some time to heal because a broken heart can be devastating to the soul. Take time to know yourself so you can make the right choice. When you're ready you will know. When you meet the right person, you will also know. But, if you jump at anything that's available, you might risk the chance of getting hurt again. Meanwhile, try to let go. Forgive, move on, and open your heart. Sooner or later, you'll find someone who'll appreciate you. As long as you don't give up on love.