Okay, so I have been sleeping around with a married man for some time now. I went to the Doctors office for a check up two weeks ago and he tells me im pregnant. This married man is the father, hes the only one ive slept with for the past year. How do I tell him this? He told me he was going to leave his wife eventually and he was just with her for the kids' sake. Do I just not tell him, and raise this child on my own? Should I have an abortion?? His wife actually works at the same hospital as me. Shes a cardiologist, hes a anesthesiologist. I'm a soon to be cardiologist. I work under her. Learning. She caught us once recently. And its been very hard at work, working with her. Um, I know that when I start to show she will go crazy. He made a promise to her that he wouldnt see me, and now she has to find out. I'm thinkin that it will be better to tell him that i had been seeing someone else. Is that a good idea?
2007-11-11 18:31:49 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
alright sweetie you need to tell him! that is half his too. He needs to know especially because it's an ongoing thing, it's not like a one night thing. one of my best friends and I did something last year in October and the day before thanksgiving 1 year ago I found out I was pregnant. I had a boyfriend, he had a girlfriend but I told him immediatly. i knew it was his and he needed to know. Sadly I had an ectopic pregnancy which was ok I was gettin an abortion anyways and both of us kept it a secret between us since we both agreed at the time and after finding out what happened to me the doc I saw told me to get rid of it or I would die. For you it;s a different story...you just really need to talk to him and see how you both feel. If he doesn't want any part or what not, you know you can do it on your own. If he does that he's an a s s! Start with him and also think hard for yourself about what you want because that may be the question from him is what do you want? Good luck, I know it's hard been there and done that.
2007-11-11 18:45:46 · answer #1 · answered by Jen22 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Thank about your baby and its needs of a biological father.....just because the situation will get nasty etc for you doesnt mean you should deprive your unborn son or daughter. You wont know his reaction until you tell him so id take a chance and remember that it takes two so why should you just be to blame in the wifes eyes and forget her.
An abortion is a personal choice that you alone will make...if u honestly think it would be terrible or too hard for u or the baby an abortion makes sense. I would give him a chance at least to find out and then make a choice about abort or not.
Listen to whats best for the baby and you cant go wrong!
2007-11-11 18:38:42 · answer #2 · answered by platinum angel 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Take some time off... think about your situation, not his or his wife's. At first blush, I'd say you should have an abortion, but that may not be what you want. Either way, you should transfer to another place, and re-evaluate your life and the path you've chosen.
If you choose not to tell him, then you must live with that descision, and never speak of it again. Only one person can keep a secret.
2007-11-11 18:40:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him about the pregnancy, and then tell him it's over. It's pretty doubtful that after a year he's going to leave his wife, in a few years he'd just have another excuse for you. He probably won't tell her, but you know she probably figure it out that it's his and then probably make your life miserable because you work under her. You might need to think about working somewhere else (if you can) or perhaps speaking to the head of your department about this. It's not a pleasant situation but you put yourself in it, and now here comes the consequences.
2007-11-11 18:58:16 · answer #4 · answered by Zyggy 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I would talk to the father and see what he says. I wouldnt let him talk you into an abortion though. I dont know its a very complicated thing you got yourself into. You guys need to work something out, and he has a right to know if he's the father. Good Luck
2007-11-11 18:40:25 · answer #5 · answered by Samantha 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Wow. It sounds like you have a lot of important decisions to make and all of them will affect your baby. You definitely need to put your baby's needs first if you chose to keep it.
It sounds like you have gotten caught up with a horrible man and should stay away from him. He knew what he was risking when he started the affair with you and if you ended up with him, he would most likely cheat on you also.
Put you and your baby's needs first. He should pay child support to you if you keep the baby so lying about the paternity is probably not a great idea.
2007-11-11 18:49:01 · answer #6 · answered by shewill5 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
no you need to tell him!!!! no matter if you decide to keep it, abort it,or put it upfor adoption its still his kid too. and then you two can make a decision on whether to keep it or not. (im against abortion but its your choice not mine) he has every right to know and not telling him would be so cruel. obviously sleeping with a married man is wrong, but he is the married one and is gonna have to suffer to consequences on telling his wife if you go ahead and have the baby. and if you do then you are gonna have to change hospitals or the wife is. but do tell him!
2007-11-11 18:37:17 · answer #7 · answered by LuckyMama06 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
he must know the truth. The rest is real complicated and hard to tell you what to do, but he is the father and this is as much his problem as yours, no matter what tell him right away and the two of you can decide together what to do next.
2007-11-11 18:40:20 · answer #8 · answered by paul 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Wow! what a mess.Well,you need to tell the father,and then you and him decide what to due together.Dont get your hopes up b/c he is not going to leave his wife.So good luck.
2007-11-11 20:39:51 · answer #9 · answered by cancel 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you have to tell him!!! he is responsible for all this to. Dont ruin the childs life by not having a father around when he/she is growing up.
2007-11-11 18:38:22 · answer #10 · answered by Julie M 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋