What can me and my wife do together to spend more quality time both of us will enjoy?

Question

I love my wife, and I love being with her. The problem is, because of my job, I find myself very exhausted most of the time. She has been expressing to me that she wants to spend more time with me. I want to also, but she is an active person and I'm more laid back, and usually tired. And in all this, I usually find little to no time for myself. What time we spend together usually consists of my lunch break, or sitting around at home.

The thing is, I would like to spend more time with her, but she wants to get out and go places and do things, while I want to rest and recover. She is happiest when she is physically active, I am happiest when I'm mentally active. She gets frustraited sitting around, and I get frustraited running around.

We both want to spend more quality time together, and even get out and go somewhere (small town, few options). And I want to have more time to sit down, rest, and let my creative and intellectual side out.

Any suggestions?

My wife does not currently work. She did for a while, and I've found her dissatisfaction over how much time we spend together has worsened since she quit her job.

We do have a buisiness on the side we work together on, which constitutes some time we spend together, but this doesn't keep her occupied much during the day when I'm gone, and when we are together working on it I would hardly call it quality time, as I at least find little enjoyment in it most of the time.

Thanks for the suggestions so far, keep them comming!

For a guy, I tend to want alot of love and affection from my wife too. And complimenting her and telling her I love you is something I do A LOT, though it never hurts to do it more.

But I know one area to work on is the little things. Just tonite she was telling me about how she would love for me just to give her little physical signs of affection, such as notes, or other small things. This is something I never realized until tonite.

Answer 1

As a wife, I can tell you, that I understand how your wife is
feeling. Women need more love and affection. Men do to,
but not as much. Remind yourself, to tell her how much you
love her and compliment her on anything.

I myself like to go out for dinner. To a nice restaurant. I really
enjoy that. At night when we get in bed, I love a back rub.
It just makes me feel great. Little things mean alot to women.
My husband works alot also, when he comes home he just
wants to go to bed and sometimes I don't mind, but it is
awful to feel alone. There are times and alot of them, when
he comes home and says what would you like to do today
honey. I love that. Even if we just go out for a drive, I enjoy
that. Just try to give her more attention. I'm sure her not
working is making her feel worse.

Answer 2

Have a couple hours each week devoted JUST to something you can both enjoy. Be creative! Just because it's a small town doesn't mean you can't do things like picnics, or walks around the park. Find a way for you to feel energized for just even an hour and spend some time with your wife.

Answer 3

I´m in your side my husband in yours wife´s. Sometimes I "have to" go wherever (not really wherever) he wants but most of the time I rest in my own time. Is that a problem, yes it is!..
along the years he´s been by his own, he has his own church (christian) I don´t have any cuz I don´t like them,,,He got involved with this amway group (that I hate by the way) I don´t even want to hear from them, and so on...Our children are in the same plan and that´s almost the only plan we have in common,,,and that´s what keep us together...I didn´t want to make any changes in my life,,,he didn´t either, and this is where we are in 20 yrs of marriage...So if you want to make a picture of you both after a few years,,,think about it!,,,They find they way out because they like to be moving, we stay in the same seat watching them to move with other people that move the same because they´re annoyingly "physically active".

Answer 4

You sound like every married couple out there,does your wife work. If you are to tired to go out then stay home have a nice dinner ,after dinner go out for a nice little walk together tell her what you would like to do to her when you get back home.Have fun in bed fall asleep wake up feeling like a million bucks.

Answer 5

Toughie. I am in the same situation with my wife. As soon as you get a decent answer, then let me know. I am in desperate need of an answer here

Answer 6

Do things you both like. One day/night do something you like. Another night do something you like together...