So my husband is a work aholic and makes his wok his number one priority! I know he loves our son & I but he is so busy all of the time and he is a position to get some of the work load off of him right now but he has to train someone to use a special program and SHE is a woman obviously by the "She" and they work in an office all day alone about 60miles away from here and I couldn't just pop in if I wanted to but thats not even the point. I have tried telling him that we need him more that he provides great financially but we need him more for security reasons we don't get to do things enough as a family! He works more than anybody I know and makes a great living for us, his average time sheet consist of 115HOURS+ in a two week time period and I think its to much! Anyways I don't know what I could do or say to him to get what I feel I need from him emotionally any ideas? P.S I have told him he doesn't really listen I need a way other than the blunt obvious you don't spend time with us
2007-11-11 14:41:19 · 4 answers · asked by Amberlyn 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is 27 and is basically at the top he doesn't have any one that knows how to do wht he is doing!
2007-11-11 15:05:07 · update #1
1st the Good news.
Some jobs require men to work long hours, and usually men have a fear of loosing that job is they appear to be slackers. Be thankful he is a good provider but it may take time for him to see the harm being done to the relationship.
You don't mention ages, so I am assuming he is young and fighting for a career to improve his families living conditions.
Remind him that his health could be the next thing affected.
Now the bad news:
Are you sure he is at work all that time. If he isn't time to crack the whip and find out what's going on for your sake and your sons.
wish you the best.
2007-11-11 14:55:59 · answer #1 · answered by Sgt Big Red 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...115 hours is a lot for an 80 hour work time. It will be hard to get him to work less...most guys ARE thier work. And he feels trapped as he must work to give his family money.
One thing you can do is live with less money. Don't buy anything flashy or new. Don't make him feel that he must bring you lots of money all the time to keep you happy. And this includes things for your kid too. Now you may not be able to do this, as you'd have to give up $200 shoes and specail food for the kid or such.
Other then that you can talk to him about it. He will just say he needs to work, of course. He feels if he was at home he would just be wasting time and not making any money. You could try to plan family time so he can be there(but don't spend any money to do it)
2007-11-11 14:52:47 · answer #2 · answered by null_the_living_darkness 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is not easy to resolve but give him more responsibilities at home ( ie get him involved with your son's activities). Are you stay at home Mom doing all the work? Well get out and let him take over some of the chores.. .Finally he might be either addicted to work or using it to mask problems which he does not want to face at home. You have to get the point across to him that he is also responsible for the family's needs ( bonding, ..etc.) at home and not just work.
2007-11-11 14:56:34 · answer #3 · answered by ensoman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should pop in and check up on him. Take your son and have lunch with your husband. Then he might come home more often to see you. Plan a vacation and force him to come with you!!!
2007-11-11 14:48:39 · answer #4 · answered by Jello-lover 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋