Parents, would you be concerned...?

Question

If, outside of the Internet - in the "real world" - adults were striking up sexually explicit conversations with your 15-year-old child? Would you be concerned for the child's safety? Would you question the ethics of the adults doing such things?

I ask because in the gender and Women's Studies section, I have expressed some concerns about a 15-year-old girl who asks and answers such questions (quite intelligently I would add), and when I posted this:

Actually, I have very serious misgivings about it and it saddens me to see such things, but I also respect her intelligence and thoughtfulness, so I am of two minds about it.

EDIT

The fact that people don't even feel any ambivalence about this and are giving me thumbs down for expressing ambivalence even while I also respect the young woman in question suggests to me that our society is truly lost.

If a grown man were having such conversations with a girl of her age, that behavior would be what psychologists who deal with sexual offenders call "grooming". It might also be what law enforcement calls "indecent liberties".

I have gotten only thumbs down

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ah2NxKjrytcimewIDD64LhYYxgt.;_ylv=3?qid=20071111164537AALBJMx

Compare your answer

to answers here:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgevrsSa_xFIwaTFiNEGarMYxgt.;_ylv=3?qid=20071111185710AAmfp3O

Dani

Just to be clear, I admire her for having intelligence and exceptional knowledge for her age, not for her choice of conversation topics. I hate to discourage intelligent young people from learning, but I wish it was easier to protect them from harm and that more people took seriously the cncern of protecting them.

Answer 1

People are giving you a "thumbs down" because you're concerned about a 15 year old having sexually explicit conversations with "adults", in the "real world"? As a mental health professional with 20+ years experience, now retired, and a parent of two, ages 22 and 23, I'd say if you weren't concerned, you needed a psychological exam! It is important, however, to know just who these "adults" are. For example, if they are doctors, or some respectable professional, that might be more okay, depending on the ethics of that particular professional, and even some friends the 15 year old has made, and are "respectable", might be okay, but, if MY 15 year old, boy or girl, were having such sexually explicit conversations with any "adult", I'd be concerned enough to want to know who these adults are, and under what pretense they are having these discussions. At that age, neither gender is mature enough to handle extenuating circumstances which might develop with such discussions, and they need someone in their corner to guide them. I can tell you as well, that I'd be willing to get help from law enforcement to identify and even confront said "adults" as to their purposes and intents. Anybody who'd give you a "thumbs down" on your concern either isn't a parent, never has been, or isn't capable of being a respectable one. God Bless you.

Answer 2

Yes,I would be very concerned. My first question,would be what are the ages of these adults. If you're talking about an 18 year old,my concern would go down,because they are so close in age. If you're talking about 25 and up,I would probably contact the people and find out what is up. Are they pedophiles? Are they preying on children? Are they just plain stupid? I would limit the contact that my child had with these people. If I thought my child was in danger,I would make a report,and possibly get a restraining order. You have to go with your gut feelings. If you think something is wrong,chances are it is. No one is going to protect your child like you can. Dig deeper into the situation and get some answers.

Answer 3

When 15 year olds are talking about sex, all parents should be concern, be it among themselve or with olders outsider adults.

At 15 years, it is ususally out of curiosity. It's an experimental age. Would be good if parents can find a suitable time and "stage" to bring the child to a no pressure platform (at theier level) where he/she can communication and get the info they wanted. This will take a lot of tack and maybe some light sense of humour induce into such conversation willl help. Never start with accusation. It is best to lure the child into telling you what he/she is cooking up to and then you give your best advise. Always maintain a "My dear child, I 'm here. You can always talk to me." manner and easy composture.

When an outside adult talks sex to a child, it can be of mischief. Please handle the situation before it is too late.

Answer 4

I didn't give you a thumbs down but I thought about it because you admired her for it also. I think she should not be answering questions like that at all and that she shouldn't be fooling around with any sexual issues at her age. She should wait until she feels ready to deal with possible std's or babies in her future if she keeps down the road she is on.
At her age the only source of sexual info should be from her parents. I just hate the society we live in.

Answer 5

Honestly, with or without a computer, I would be concerned, if my baby is out there and some perve started talking about sexual activities. I would go crazy. People these days don't care about anything except there own personal desire no matter who or what the object/person is. I remember going trick or treating without parents after dark, now we can't let our children out the door, cause we never know what will happen. Society is only getting worse with sexual predators.

Answer 6

I ought to respond to honestly as an adoptive mom from foster care. I care very plenty approximately her function of their lives, and settle for her actuality that she replaced into no longer in a position to confirm. yet as I have been given the youngsters at a while 4,5 & 6, and now 2 years later they are particularly deaing with the matters of being critically omitted the 1st factors of their existence and then shifting caregivers and so on., I ought to assert my recommendations of her are actually not very superb. I make constructive I in no way have this attitude in front of the youngsters ever nonetheless. this is not comparable to toddler adoption, yet foster undertake there's a superb line between being ethical approximately adoption and so on., and having feels over the outcomes of somebody's strikes over the youngsters.

Answer 7

Most definately! I also question it in the real world. There is no reason for an adult to take a 'special' interest in someone underage. What someone thinks usually manifests in their actions so if they are thinking about it and taking the next step by 'talking' inappropriately then they will soon up the ante and go all the way.

Answer 8

Explicit sexually conversations with a 15 year old outside of the doctors office is illegal. Call a cop

Answer 9

I have news for you..... THEY ARE!!!

Which is why the same rules apply on the internet as they do in real life... at least in our household.

The predators are everywhere.... here on the internet the tracks can be seen, and so they are noticed, but in the real world there is not a written record of what the football coach just said to your daughter, and so the event goes unnoticed. (Or recently what the preacher said to my girls.....while I was standing there with them.... in the toy isle at target.... that by the way did not go unnoticed)

So do be concerned for your child's safety, and equip your child with the best weapon and the one that is so sorely lacking these days.... Common Sense!

Answer 10

Yes! Yes! And Yes! Absolutely! I would most certainly be concerned for the safety of my child. And I would do a whole helluva lot more than just question the ethics of the adult in question -- I'd jolly well put a STOP to it!