i am only 17 years old, my partner is 23 and i have just found out i am 5 weeks pregnant. i think i want to keep it but i dont think he does. he wont really say much about it. i dont feel that i should have an abortion because we made a mistake. we have not been together that long and at this age it is the last thing i would have planned but it has happened now and i feel we should get on face the consequences and make it work??? i feel it could be so amazing but am worried i am not going to be able to give my baby the life he/she deserves. i dont know how to make a decision like this?? we are not exactly rich and both living at home with our parents. i dont want to do somethingt i am going to regret but i donnt want to do something that is going to ruin my life and the potential babies life... if that makes sense....anyone please help!?
2007-11-11 11:07:19 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
You both should sit down together (maybe with both sets of parents as well) and way out the pros and "cons" of having a baby at your age, with your financial situation, etc. I am glad that you are feeling responsible, because many people your age would be at an abortion clinic faster than you can say abortion. However, if you decide that you are not suited to be a parent, there are so many wonderful people out there that can not have a baby and would love to give a home to your child. It may be hard to give up your child, but it may be in the baby's best interest if you feel you can't take care of him/her. You don't have to rush into any decision just yet..Take it day by day and see how you are feeling by your 2nd trimester. However, if your partner doesn't want you to have the baby, please don't allow him to bully you into something that you will regret down the road. Best of luck. If you need to chat, feel free to email me at apriljeffmelinda@yahoo.com
2007-11-11 11:17:21 · answer #1 · answered by Mommy to 2 Princesses under 2 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
First of all TALK TO YOUR PARENTS. They may scream and yell but you have to talk to them. My parents freaked out and I was 19 when I got pregnant. My BF was great and he knew he wanted to already marry me and now i've been married 6 1/2 years. But he was my same age. SO a 23 year old living at home and having sex with a 17 year old girl. Ummmm lose the BF. Don't have an abortion but give the baby up for adoption. Your guy doesn't sound like he's going to step up and be a dad so give your baby more by giving it a whole family. There are great people out there just praying for a baby.
2007-11-11 11:18:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You're the only one who can decide if you want to have the baby and keep it, give it up for adoption, or, have an abortion and not have to decide anymore what to do.
If you feel really strongly against abortion, then have the baby and give it up. You are far too young to be tied to a child that you're not ready for and this guy, well, he wont be there for you. If you have the baby, let it go to a loving family who can provide for it now. You need to get an education and then be in a stable relationship before you even think about kids.
Abortion is a very personal choice and it is just that, your choice. You don't have to be pregnant if you don't want to be. Be sure that you explore ALL of your options and make the decision that is the best for YOU.
2007-11-11 11:17:42 · answer #3 · answered by snowbirdbabe 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
First of all, what are you doing with a 23 year old? And why is he STILL living at home with mommy and daddy? I commend you for taking responsibility for your actions and not jumping at the chance to have an abortion. Think about adoption. There are plenty of couples out there that cannot have children but will be able to offer yours a loving and safe home. You're still early enough in your pregnancy that you have time to decide on whether to keep this baby or give it up. Please, whatever you do, get rid of the 23 year old. Sounds like a complete loser.
2007-11-11 11:14:22 · answer #4 · answered by N and A's Momma 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My first suggestion is for you not to have an abortion. I had one when I was 18, and it was the biggest mistake of my life. It was something I live with every day and its not easy. I have an 8 month old daughter and when I got pregnant my now husband and I hadn't been together very long, and it was an accident but we worked through the hard times and we are doing really good now. She is the joy of my life, and I wouldnt trade her for the world. I know you are worried about being a good parent, but there is no book, and every parent does the best they can when it comes to that point. I wish you the best.
2007-11-11 11:18:22 · answer #5 · answered by armeebarbee 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Please do not have an abortion!! Every single woman I know regrets it! I was adopted because my mother got pregnant at 16. That is something you would have to live with and think about and wonder about for the REST of your life! If your parents are supportive and will help you by all means keep your baby and if not put it up for adoption. Just take care of yourself no matter how you are feeling b/c pregnancy effects your hormones and emotions too.
2007-11-11 11:50:43 · answer #6 · answered by pregohautie 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
in the end only you can make this decision. a family friend of mine found out she was pregnant at 15, she wasn't with the guy and didn't no what to do. she had booked to get a abortion and couldn't go through with it. the dad and her got back together but are now apart she has a beautiful 9month baby boy and is renting and apartment, she adores her little boy and is so happy she kept him. i fell pregnant when i was 18 and am now pregnant with my second and love it. you need to sit your boyfriend down and tell him how you feel. and talk things through. these things happen and facing things is much better then maybe having regrets later on. good luck with your decision.
2007-11-11 11:18:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Regardless of what he thinks, keep the baby. Abortion is a very big decision and it sounds like you aren't prepared to make it. Keep the baby... things might be hard at first, but they can and will work out. You're right.. you shouldn't get an abortion just because you BOTH made a mistake. Good luck!
2007-11-11 11:14:05 · answer #8 · answered by Holy Macaroni! 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
At least you're thinking with a clear mind. I would say terminate the pregnancy. I and many other women will tell you that having a child at such a young age, and unprepared will make your life and your child's life so much harder. I would take advantage of being so young, and being able to go to college, and get a good job, and travel and buy whatever you want, buy a house, save money, do whatever you want, and then have a baby. It's unfair sometimes to tell your baby I cant get it cause I have no money, and I cant take you places you want to go cause I cant afford it. Its better to have security before having it, just cause it makes life so much easier. It's a lot of stress, and its better to spend the time, having fun and raising your child, withouth worrying about money, and things when you can wait and give them everything you want. It's your choice, either way its a hard one.
2007-11-11 11:29:58 · answer #9 · answered by Brandnewshoes 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that abortion is the last option. IF anything, bless the lives of a family who desperately wants a child, and put it up for adoption. Contact a social worker and You can help pick the family!
On the brightside, if youre going to keep it make sure you have the support of your parents since you arent legally and adult, they can help you a lot. You would be amazed by how much better you feel when you have the support of your family. Talk to them about it! And remember, Men come and go out of your life, but that child is bound to you forever. Its your body, and only you can decide :)
Congradulations and Goodluck!
Robyn
2007-11-11 11:16:30 · answer #10 · answered by Elijah's Mama 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋