How do you develop conversation skills?

Question

Im socially awkward. Yet friendly and shy..yeah i know my personality is a complete cotnradiction. At times I feel like I bore people with what I have to say. How to become more interesting?

Answer 1

People find talking about themselves more interesting than anything else. You want to be interesting to others, so here's my suggestion. Don't worry about talking about yourself, at least at first. Ask people about themselves. Learn what little you can about them and then prepare a few questions ahead of time and just ask. Be sure to ask open ended questions that the other person cannot just answer by saying Yes or No.

For example, I love to play video games. If you met me and said "So you like video games?" I'd say "Yeah! totally! You?" and you'd say "Erm..not really" and we'd both smile and the conversation would die.

Instead if you said to me "I hear you like video games. Which ones are your favorite?" Then when I tell you you ask, "Why did you like those particular ones?" Then when I answer you ask "Well I have never played, but could you suggest a few games for beginners?", then I'm talking non-stop and you can listen and smile and I think "What a nice person s/he is!" :-)

You've asked about me, you've explored my likes and dislikes, and you've asked me to teach you something or share my passion with you. What a great conversation we just had, eh? :-)

It will come with time. I suggest you start with extroverts. My son is shy and he tried to date a shy girl and they both liked each other, but they were both so shy that no one could think of what to say and the awkward silences just grew and grew and that was it. He followed my advice about asking open ended questions but she was so shy that she answered in 1-2 sentences, and then my son had to think of ANOTHER question and he just about exhausted himself. So find a chatterbox and start up a conversation.

Good luck!

Answer 2

what i woudl do is find peopel you are most comfortable with, and then jsut talk about things that are interesting. if its an intellectual crowd, talk about what you like to read. talk about travel. talk about what you watch on tv. the friendly and shy is not a contradiction, its just that you want to be friendly but cant because youre shy, and that makes you socially awkward. i totally udnerstand. just relax, know that if you mess up with one person or group of people, first of all, that you will have a second chance probably, and if not, you can always find more people to hang out with. theres no such thing as a missed opportunity really, because people are all around, jsut go out and find some who have some similar interests, relax.

there is this boy in a class of mine, who has like this major speech impediment, and peopel still like him. i look at him and say, well if he can do it, i can.

good luck

Answer 3

Ahh...

We used to share the same problem...

But I got over it...

I just let people know about the things I'm good at, because this will increase my self-confidence...

You say that you're friendly, so getting along with someone shouldn't be too difficult for you...

And talk about something that does seem funny...

Don't forget to talk in an enthusiastic way...

And don't forget to smile...

You'll get more friends that way...

Have a nice day...

Answer 4

If you don't feel confident face to face then you might like to try online chatting. A program like ICQ is good for trying out conversation skills. It takes time and practise like everything else. Another idea is try something like Toastmaster to help you get used to speaking up.

Personally I try and find common ground when chatting with people. Try and be interested in others, look them in the eye while chatting and read their body language to monitor if subjects aren't working for you. Maybe you could try asking the person your talking to some questions about themselves. Try talking about stuff we all have in common, jobs, clothing, shoes, pets, family to get you started.

Answer 5

If you can try introducing fun facts into conversations. Also, try telling good clean jokes from time to time. Join groups that interests you and when you go to the meetings you will enjoy whats being said and be able to ad to conversations.

Answer 6

ok, so the certainty you have regarded your difficulty section and decide directly to develop it relatively is staggering. i assume listening to something like 'get a popular fee mate' by employing that Lea Downes (i think of it relatively is sweet?) could be a commence, its an audio e book approximately communication skills. You wanna pay attention for closed questions. they say you may desire to continuously tutor activity interior the girl by employing asking approximately her... basically make beneficial the questions you're asking do no longer require a one or 2 word answer. The greater she responds with, the greater you may play with on the counter attack. Questions like 'So I hear you have a dogs' are basically begging for a definite or No answer. commencing with something like 'tell me approximately...' on the different hand is with any luck going to furnish you lots greater counsel to play with. They the different occasion do the artwork :o) 2d, commencing a communication is generally the discomfort interior the butt and the section maximum conflict with. in case you're a humorous guy, then use humour (it frequently in no way fails as a results of fact regardless of if the comic tale hits the floor, she's snigger besides out of regularly occurring politeness). don't be afraid to tutor it on your self the two... i'm beneficial a woman could discover the certainty which you will snigger at your self an appropriate characteristic. you apart from mght elect to remark on issues you spot. If she's wearing an spectacular top of regardless of, point out it. seen clues are a vogue in. 2d to final, decide the ambience. attempt and get an thought of a thank you to apply your language and how you act. If shes a rock chick, do no longer pass all shakespeare on her... exchange your recommendations-set 'Cool top'.... ultimately... All of those issues pull off in case you convey self belief with it. Act that a dribbling fool and issues do no longer look as genuine. Chicks digg self belief and that they elect to be sure a beneficial recommendations-set. Couple that with humour and you're onto a winner. a million different factor on your 'mentally sluggish' remark. it relatively is a basic false impression for persons who're Kinesthetic in nature. as a results of fact of this you're feeling based, take time conversing and are greater in touch with you ecosystem. all of us is diverse, i'm a seen man or woman, I talk rapid and use my hands as seen aids as quickly as I talk. reliable luck my chum.

Answer 7

Join the US Navy SEALS

Answer 8

Know that you have no control over what others "think". And what does, what they "think", matter anyway?