Can you please give advice?

Question

Ok so here's the story and question....

I was with my girlfriend almost 5 years....we loved each other very much....we did have some fights and arguments.
I wasn't perfect, I did say mean things sometimes or do things but I have OCD and Borderline Personality Disorder.
Not all of it, but most of it was caused by my problems, I have been getting help and working on myself for the last
year and a half and been getting better. I regularly go to my therapist and psychiatrist and take my meds as prescribed.
I have gotten better. She left me 3 months ago because she said she didn't like the way I treated her. She is the type
that wants a "fairytale" relationship. Everyone has told her including her parents that she won't get that with anyone.
She also expects no fights or arguments. Well anyways she told me for the first two months after she left...that she
still wanted to be with me, she loves me, misses me, wants to know I'm serious about us, etc. Then two weeks after
that go by and she doesn't say much to me....well I texted her a lot but it was because when I tried to give her space
before by not texting as much, she would text me and say why are you ignoring me or I don't think you're serious about
this...and then when I did she didn't want me to text or wouldn't text me back most of the time.

So after those two weeks,
all of a sudden one night when I was texting, she sends me pictures of her and this girl kissing and laying next to each
other in bed. I was baffled and shocked....she said that is her new girlfriend and that she is happy. Well we went through
her getting the rest of her stuff. Then when I texted her after that she was saying all this nasty stuff to me (laughing at me,
saying mean and hurtful things, letting her friends and gf laugh at me, etc.) She met this girl through the internet on her
cell phone through this text messaging service, texted her (not knowing her at all before) for two months and then met
her in person finally for the first time 3 wks-1 month ago. So within 3 weeks of her still saying the stuff she did with me,
about loving me, wanting to know I'm for real, worried if I wanted it over.....she then said after those 3 weeks that she has
moved on, that she is happy, and she loves this girl.

After almost 5 years....she tells me this sh** and then moves on
in 3 weeks??? Do you think this is for real??? What do you think??? Please interpret it for me. So then I was texting her
to get clear answers and how sick is it that her new girlfriend is so timid that she let me ex control her and have her text
me to answer for her, which weren't answers to what I asked. So then my ex also sent pictures of this ring that her gf
supposedly got her (which come to find out, my ex paid for herself, lol) and tells me they are getting married soon. So
she got mad finally because I kept texting her (which I know is wrong but I wanted answers) and finally got so pis*** that
she didn't even want to be my friend. Which I don't understand why she would have wanted to when the break up wasn't
mutual and she knows I still wanted to be with her and loved her.

My ex does have Bipolar and she is exhibiting signs
of a "manic" episode. She has been drinking a lot, hanging out with the wrong kind of people, not paying bills and spending money like wildfire (which is something she complained about me is paying the bills late), doing things on a whim
out of the ordinary (she bought plane tickets to go to NM just because she talked to someone and they reminded her
how much she liked it there) and then she said she has to postpone it now and that she also said she wanted to move
there in a letter she wrote me a week before she met her new gf, which the letter also said, I am having an affair with
NM, so to answer your question I am seeing NM, then a week later that??? Sorry this is long but I wanted to explain
the whole situation and ask that you please give me some kind of insight or help. Could this be her Bipolar, has she
flipped or is she just selfish??? Thank you for your answers/help. (Yes, we are both girls)

Oh yeah and I was also nice enough to do whatever my ex asked even after she left, including sending a medicine I take, which is a same one she was taking for her Bipolar and sending it to her and me going without. And that is how I get repayed. She has now stopped taking her meds, and has not gotten any help for herself.

Why I am asking and trying to understand is cuz it's killing me inside and I am confused. I still love her with all my heart and don't know what to think or do.

To the last person who responded ....Borderline Personality Disorder is not Multiple Personalities!!!!

Answer 1

I won't pretend to understand how two women can fall in love,it's way beyond me but it's your life and if that's your thing so be it.
It sounds like she is out of control and losing herself in this other girl,this girl is showing and doing things she has never experienced before and it's exciting for her. You need to stay away from her and stop texting her. If you want her to come back to you ,you need to let her miss you. I know it's hard i don't care who you are, when someone you love brakes your heart you feel like you can't go on without her. When my husband left me it hurt so bad i had to take it a minute at a time then 5 minutes and so on. Keep in mind that you are the one who has the memorizes and years with her and that is something that doesn't go away in a day or a month. your the one that is in her heart forever. She will come to her senses and when she does she'll be back with you just like my husband came back to me.

Answer 2

Wow! Lots of drama. All this behavior is a form of "crazy making" or mind-fxxking.

The problem I found with trying to make sense of the 'nonsense' of my BPD ex, is that it will never happen and I am just wasting my time, and not living my own life. Every moment I spent trying to figure him out was a moment of my life thrown away on his behalf, and I finally decided, he's not worth it.

The simplist answer is......"she's wacko". That's just a term I use when someone is not their right mind and not making sense, I don't mean it to be derogatory either, just simple.

I'm proud of you for taking your meds and continuing to see your therapist. My ex has borderline but he wasn't able to see that he needed help.

Do you know about DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy )Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal, Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation, and Distress ...developed by Marsh Linehan?

If not, this is specifically used for BPD.

Don't waste another minute of your life, decide to let go and free yourself.

Answer 3

That whole thing sounds crazy. Even though it will be hard, I think you should move on.Keep working on yourself and improving your life. You don't need the extra drama that your EX is giving, I'm sure you will meet someone much better suited for you. Even though you love someone that does not mean that you're suppose to be together or even that you're good for each other, Good luck with everything,

Answer 4

I think the best advice to give you is move on with your life. She doesn't seem worth your time, you can find someone else who is better for you and won't be a waste of your time. She doesn't deserve you.
Best of Luck!

Answer 5

the truth is , she being a total biiitch and you dnt deserve shhit like that. you should just move on . if she really loved you then she wouldnt try hurting you and taking the pis out of you. just let her go and find a new girl

Answer 6

Go now take your medicine .. See your doctor.....have the dosage dramatically increased and call me early in the morning... Watch out for those different dodododododododod personalities ... They may get ya if you don't take your meds!!!!

Answer 7

Sorry, but you sound like a match made in hell! Move on man!

Answer 8

No chance here. Move on.