Need someone to offer commentary, suggestions on my biography of George W. Bush?

Question

***Intelligent answers are appreciated***
You can tell me what I should take out, add, whatever, I am all for suggestions. By the way, it's long so if you don't feel like reading it, that's okay. But if something catches your eye and you want make a suggestion, that's fine by me. Thank you!

I started out with a preface
When I first read the assignment details I thought, Oh, great! This is probably going to be one the toughest assignments yet. Not because supporting Bush would be hard to persuade others to do, but because I knew how awful of a time I would have sifting through the hate-sites – veering away from anything containing morphed pictures and bad language. It’s just sad how often Bush is hammered by the press and how he is always the butt of jokes and cartoons, but yet he takes it, and doesn’t let it affect his job performance. What a classy guy!

Nowadays, the internet is such a biased place. It’s just not known as a reliable source...

. So for this project, I relied on my own knowledge, books, and websites ending in .gov. Here is what I gathered.

Our Forty-Third President

George Walker Bush was born July 6, 1946 to George Herbert Walker Bush and Barbara Pierce Bush in New Haven, Connecticut. The Bush Family later relocated to Midland, Texas. Our Forty-third president, served 6 years as the 46th Governor of the State of Texas before being sworn into office January 20, 2001. he was re-elected for a second term on November 2, 2004, and sworn in on January 20, 2005.

“Presidents, whether things are good or bad, get the blame. I understand that.” - George W. Bush.
(I want to mention the Iraq war. I don’t believe I can without offending my teacher, what can I put? I don’t believe George Bush lied, or that we are fighting an illegal war, just some ideas, or places to look would be great )



“Does a Leader lead? Or does a Leader follow?”
George Bush is not known to follow public opinion.

Our Allies – A Surprisingly Long List

Despite the hullabaloo you may hear from the media, our relationships with other nations are stronger than you might think. The list of our allies has changed a lot over the years. Of course there are those Middle Eastern countries where we remain unpopular, but look at how many people stand by us!

Front and center is POLAND! There probably is no ally as faithful and true as them.

Australia. They were rocked by a similar 9-11 attack in their part of the world at around the same time, but they've held true.

Albania - “We want to be as helpful as possible to the United States and stand ready to join the coalition of the willing as your friend and ally." Prime Minister Fatos Nano.

Next up, and of far more significant is the UK, they've been there for us. They’ve provided more than 45, 000 men and women including Royal Navy, Royal Marines and Royal Air Force personnel to help in Iraq.

Japan and South Korea have been up there.

. "We totally support President Bush if he takes military action," Koizumi said. "We take this position because we place primary importance on the Japan-U.S. alliance and international cooperation."

France has recently joined us and Germany has given a little in Afghanistan.

Pakistan (Bin Laden’s Location) may just be the most valuable ally against Al Qaeda.

Czech Republic and Slovakia have pledged their Kuwait-based anti-chemical warfare unit of 427 members and opened airspace to military over flights.

The government of Saudi Arabia, by all actions appears to be on our side, as much as we could hope. They kept their support for the Iraq war secret for as long as they could. Harboring US troops in the "kingdom of Allah" is one of Bin Laden's talking points.

See what I mean? We have strong ties with countries all over the world. The Iraq war has been a true test with just who is on our side.

Answer 1

I'm not really sure what the context is, is it like a debate or a speech or something?

The preface is pretty good.

"websites ending in .gov."
I would change this

The biography paragraph is good.

About the Iraq War, if you support the war maybe you should acknowledge that the adminstration made mistakes, but there is also some data that the recent surge is showing signs of progress, so you could use that, and argue why you think we need to stay there, (if that's what you think)

I would put more of a transition when you go to the allies, and maybe not spend quite as much time on the allies, it seems like the main part of your speech.

I would change the word "hulabaloo", I wouldn't emphasize Poland as much, there was a joke about Bush after his poor performance in the first debate in 2004, when Kerry said we didn't have as many allies and then he responded "don't forget Poland". You definetley want to give more specifics on the attack in Austrailia, because I'm honestly not sure what it is. Also the UK has been withdrawing troops and not supporting the war effort as much lately, but they were a key ally in Iraq early on. Mention the new leaders in France and Germany relating to the increased support. Pakistan I wouldn't mention as much because of the controversey there. And Saudi Arabia is also controversial.

And I would have more of a conclusion.

Anyway I don't know if this helps.

Answer 2

and he has overcome terrific obstacles.

he has a felony conviction for drunk driving, back in the 70's - when you REALLY had to be drunk to get the conviction.

he has a felony conviction for disorderly conduct.

he is a recovering alcoholic.

he knocked up one of his girlfriends when he was younger.

he went awol while pretending to serve in the guard during vietnam - basically spent the entire war face down in some pub in alabama.

he traded sammy sosa when he owned a pro baseball team.

he failed repeatedly as a businessman.

Answer 3

iy needs some more work.