What would you do ?

Question

If you have no money for food, couldnt pay your rent because you had to renew your drivers license and car insurance, and a friend sent money to your son to pay your rent for you and an extra$100 for food and your son kept the $100 and invited his friends over for dinner and went out and spent it on steaks for his "dinner party"?

Because I am collecting social services he had to send it to my son, and I HATE being dishonest, it goes against the grain, BIG TIME. But I have gone from about 130 lbs down to about 105 lbs in the last month and a half.

I receive $600 a month and my rent is $500, then there is the cell phone bill, overdue now, the cost of the storage locker $112 a month, and various prescriptions, vitamins etc that I have to pay for, gas for the car, water .. well y'all know how it is --

I am so angry at my son right now. If my friend knew he would have some kind of fit he would be so enraged. I cant even talk to my son right now.

He said he thought he could pay me back the next day, but the job fell through. BUT the dinner party was last night, three days after the fact.

Sorry I havent been feeling able to be very "funny" on here lately. Right now my sense of humour has taken a hiatus

I have ads in the free paper for all my stuff except for the little things that mean something to me - you know, like a candle holder etc. No one has called about anything, couch, bed, entertainment unit, solid wood oak dresser and bedside tables, oak dining table, tv, and I have it listed really cheap. :-( called the place back about the $1100 worth of tools who had offered me $100 and now they say they dont want them after all

The food bank was closed due to lack of funding, and I cant use public transit. It only comes every couple of hours and I cant carry anything myself, like 10 lbs of groceries, my maximum is 5 lbs.

Lots of good suggestions, thanks

my son is 27 and old enough to darn well grow up and stop being so selfish IMO

Outta here you really are so freaking stupid that you think I am CHOOSING to live this way? God willing you will end up totally disabled someday and in excruciating pain and unable to work - one can only hope.

I apologize for losing my temper, I am just so damn tired of people thinking I am just choosing to be lazy. I have tried dozens of different jobs hoping to be able to return to viable employment, I last 2 months, maybe 3 then I am fired for taking so many days off because of the chronic pain which is agrevated by sitting, using repetive arm movements, etc. I would give almost anything to be able to work, I hate this life so much !

I am hoping in China that I can teach 2 or 3 mornings a week, kindergarten, so I can sit on the floor & be able to move around quite a bit, then have a whole day or two off to recuperate before I am back to work. With what they pay qualified teachers I can have a place to live AND food over there at least.

Goldwing you are so right, he has never done something like this before, but he has a new influence in his life and is head over heels "in lust" & out to impress her. I guess he doesnt care if he hurts his own mother doing it. I am ashamed of him

I am in Canada, and my son doesnt live with me, he just bought himself a big fancy house a few months back. He hasnt lived with me since 2004 when I loaned him the down payment for a house.

No food stamps, no rental assistance, nothing extra, the Government feels $350 a month is more than enough for rent, and $150 for utilities, food, clothing, transportation and all other expenses is also enough, which brings it to $600. My pension from workers comp is taken off so between the two of them I get only the $600.00 a month.

The Canadian Govt has no sympathy for the disabled.

Answer 1

Isotope: I've had 2 kids do me
that way. One, I bought a mobile home for (because of
the grandkids). She and lazy
a s s boyfriend tore it up.
I have a son who was so hot
for his girlfriend (now his wife)
that he even saw me walking
up the highway to get somewhere, and never even
stopped. He didn't want people to see him with me.
Are you in the US? or
Canada?
In my area the ones that
will give the help fastest are
the Mormon church and
the Adventist church. Adventists always hava a food
closet and are more than willing to help. They even
have a counseling service
where they plug you into any
community help they can get.
Kick your son out. He has
already done the unforgiveable.
I'll try to think of something
else.

Answer 2

I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. It's happening more often to people, it's hard to survive when everything gets more expensive and goes up, but salaries, pensions, social service, etc.

Talk to your son and make him see he must work at whatever he can to pay you back, but what's done is done. Do NOT let him have access to your money again. Do get a money order sent to YOU when someone sends you a gift of money.

Ask local pharmacists which pharmaceutical companies give low/no cost meds to seniors. Ask other seniors in your area what type of help they're getting, they may have information you can use. Look on the web and in the phone book for anyone who might help and call them. Check with senior services in your area that may deliver free meals or pick up groceries for you.

It's not easy asking for help, but you need it. The more you are informed, the more help you will be able to get.
Best wishes!

Answer 3

I know what your son did hurt you terribly. You should tell your friend what happened to the extra money. I know that it is embarrasing but the friend needs to know.
Have you tried to get food stamps? Have you applied for government housing? I don't see why the friend had to send money to your son. If someone wants to send you money as a gift it should not count as income.
Another way you could advertise the items you are selling is on the radio. Some stations have a ''swap shop'' everyday. They may not do this in cities but in rural areas they do and also the radio stations will have a ''swap shop'' online.
I may soon be in the same situation. With a husband with cancer and I am unable to work due to fibromyalgia.

Answer 4

I'm so sorry to hear of your troubles.

Go to your local HUD office (http://www.hud.gov) - they may be able to help you pay for your housing.

If you need help paying for prescriptions, you should look into a prescription advocacy program. (Just Google 'prescription advocacy program') As far as vitamins go, if they are necessary due to a condition or due to poor nutrition, get your doctor to prescribe them for you so that you can save on those as well.

Call your cell phone company and explain that you are waiting on funds from social services. They may give you more leeway on your bill. The same goes for all other creditors and debtors.

Go to your local food pantry and stock up on items like rice, beans, pasta, etc. that are easy to make and have lots of healthy calories.

As far as the car goes, if you have local transportation - use that as much as possible. Also, see if there are any carpooling groups in your area.

Why do you have the storage locker? If it's for the security of the items, you could get a safe for the same amount as the monthly cost. Check out your local thrift stores/pawn shops to see if you can get a safe secondhand.

I don't know how old your son is, but it seems like he doesn't really understand the gravity of your situation. Sit him down, show him all your bills, and explain to him what will happen if you don't pay them. (Lose the apartment, lose water, lose electricity, lose phone, etc) Start from the position that he just doesn't understand and go from there...try to be calm.

I hope that helps!

Answer 5

Ya Know... I've often wanted to build a hotel like home that all my elder friends can live peacefully in. We do so much to take care of one another on a daily basis anyway it just seems like a natural thing to do... In fact the home that we have been restoring/redecorating for the past 2 years may become exactly that. I'm sorry but their family members really Pi** me off... the are able just not willing, and it's just little things that would make life so much easier... but... they are there with outstretched hands when they need something.

I'm so sorry you are going through this Hon... this is not the way life should be at our age... Big Hug from Scoot!

Answer 6

Have a long talk to your son. & tell him, Hes not Honest & wont get no more money, I have two sons, ages 33 And 27, & tell your son, Im sorry, Im a Older person, & not young like you, & you wont get no more money, & say youll always love him, & hang up phone, Tell him on phone ( if your able ) can you get Food Stamps? meals on wheels? you may Quilify If you ask, Also Tell your Friends to, Maybe all Can Pinch in to help you, Or maybe not, Christmas is coming, Your son is Old enough now to be a MAN, He may have to go down Hard roads, But Hey< hes Putting you down Hard Road, Right? dont Give In to him No More, Your Only feeding to His Excuses, Entertainment, & hes having a Ball on your money, Ughhhh Kids Now Days, Ill Sure Pray For Ya.

Answer 7

Sell everything in the storage locker and get rid of that bill. Tell your friend to never send it to your son again. Get signed up for all the free food commodities you can and any other social services that you can. If you can take public transportation, can you get rid of the car? I have my Mother in my insurance policies. It does save a little money for her insurance wise. A car is very very expensive if you live on a fixed income. Fill your kitchen pantry with lots of foods so you do not go hungry. As for your son, I will not comment. Tell him he needs to give you 50.00 a month. Sign me: a good daughter with a good brother but Mother takes money advantage of us. She thinks she is a bank & loans money to people she barely knows. You know what happens with that.

Answer 8

I don't know how old your son is, but you need to get someone to talk to him very quickly and very seriously about getting his act together.

I would also give him a time frame to get a job, or get out, if he is living with you, it's called tuff lough. And that's what it it ;- Tuff. And look for someone else to share with you who is trustworthy and you KNOW will pay their way and have the rent. DO not let your son put you in this position. It is untenable.

Isatope try not to sell furniture to pay expenses. Maybe have a garage sale, to get rid of stuff you really don't need. That may help in bringing in some extra cash.

Answer 9

Go to your state social services office. There should be programs ( food stamps, heating assistance, rent assistance, prescriptions, etc.) for you. No one can live on that amount that you have coming in and I can't believe your son did that instead of buying food for his mother! If you lived in my state ( with your small income ) you would be eligible for all programs and not have to worry about anything.

Answer 10

You already have a lot of good suggestions. I will say I am sorry this is your plight. I am sure like many disabled people you would work if you could. I hope you can find a church or some organization there to help you.