its not that i look to fight with him when i feel like it. but i've learned from others that even if it has to be from fighting, if two people can get things out in the open about each other's falws it gives an opertunity to better themselves. i ask him tons of things just to even get the slightest critisizm.
what's wrong with me? -
nothing, i love you the way you are
me - you don't mind being married to a "walking crayon"? (my hair is lavender, i wear really colorful clothes, thats another long story)
him - "of course not, you color up my life!"
me - "your hair is pretty messy today"
him - "i'll go and fix it if you want, yours is looking great by the way."
me - "you know, sometimes i think you're too good for me"
him - "that can't be right, i think you're perfect"
im not ungreatful or insecure about anything, its just i really want to be in the same level with him. he treats me like im a queen which i can't be ok with, i have my falws, and sometimes i want him to be honest with me
2007-11-11 04:04:20 · 4 answers · asked by Avatar 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
christ you are insecure
you find a guy who loves you , flaws in all , for who you are
and you complain about that?
i guess you have not been dumped, cheated on or other things that happen to women so you can feel at their level and complain my hubby is such and a s s , he does.. blah blah blah...
be happy you can communicate
be happy when you throw something out there he responds to your requests,, and it is a request...not a criticism
fighting BTW is the domain of children
who cannot properly communicate and therefore defer to shouting, yelling and fist pounding ( as well as many other gestures ) to ) hopefully ) get their point across and try to validate that their point is more valid than yours.
and that where you lose respect,, as an adult to a child
and as a adult to adult
because in a fight that's where hurt full words are always thrown out
i can commend your husband because he is secure and in control and sees no need for taking up to the next level
he will not rise to the bait of "triggers" that preceed a fight
he has seen the futility of fighting ( not the same as debate BTW ), i am the same way and have learn from other that fighting is pointless and people do so out of fear and insecurity, you have learned the wrong way to communicate and hence you insecurities
it's a wonder you even got married
2007-11-11 04:18:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you want him to be a little more outgoing. Tell you what he likes about you so that you can do the things that turn him on a little more. You want him to make a few more decisions so that you do not have too. simple things like when togo out and eat pick a place and not just say what ever you want. Same when you ask about what clothes to wear. Make a choice.
2007-11-11 12:33:46 · answer #2 · answered by ronnny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it isn't broke - don't fix it. . .
2007-11-11 12:25:02 · answer #3 · answered by this_girl_loves_the_80s 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well tell him that.
2007-11-11 12:14:52 · answer #4 · answered by Nessaja 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋