Girls Only - is this rude?

Question

I got into an argument with this girl, who I like and she likes me too but I've been getting tired of her antics so I basically said this...

I have to talk to u about certain things that I want to straighten out. I’m busy too, I have school, basketball tournaments to attend at, friends & family to meet up with, plus I work too. So please spare me the excuses of how busy u are. I know you have time, I’m not asking you, I’m telling you that were going to talk, I’ve kept my mouth shut to long because you keep avoiding things like a shy little girl. So I don’t know when this will be. But yes, something is bothering me regarding your behavior and it does kinda upset me that you're doing this to me, so I will be civil and tell u, however I am not going to be a hermit who keeps there emotions bottled up inside, so don’t expect me to read your mind…News flash, I’m not physic. So, if u have any level of decency to realize that I have known u since...

Gr8 then listen to me. Becuz I wanna know whether ur just another girl who from her own enjoyment is stringing guys along seeking male attention with her superficial, insecure, low-self esteem ways or if something really is bothering you then tell me. I’m not here to start ****, if something truly is bothering you then tell me, I can be understanding and listen to you as well but you have to talk sooner or later and you have to understand the fine line between a guy who only cares about your looks compared to a guy who actually has the balls to tell you something straight up and treat that girl as a regular individual

Answer 1

it would probably make me cry lol

Answer 2

All this seems to do is perpetuate the arguement, instead of trying to solve it.

There are some instances where yall wont agree on something, and if thats the case... let it go. Youre not changing her mind, and shes not changing yours. There is not, however, any excuse to be condesending or hateful... even if she was first. Two wrongs dont make a right. If shes being a b**** then just do your best to difuse the situation, if you cant then just say "look... i like/care for/love you but Im not going to spend all day arguing over this. Im going home/hanging up/taking a walk." And leave it at that.... give her 30 minutes or so and shell calm down.

She does need to learn to express herself more frequently to clue you in to whats going on, but make sure that youre RECEPTIVE to what shes saying. Meaning, if shes saying that you are being distant, ask her to elaborate so you wont do it again.... and then DONT do it again. If she wont pay you the same courtesy, then you need to say "you know, Ive listened to your issues, it would be nice if you would do the same for me, so that we can be a happier couple"... if shes still griping, then give her time to cool off, and she will listen.

NEVER HANG UP ON HER without saying goodbye... its just bad manners and poor taste.

Dont be defensive when shes venting, remember its just the way she feels not written in the constitution. Just say "thanks Ill take a look at that". Dont be condescending... itll just hurt her and escalate the situtation. Dont have contempt for her either.... it just shuts you down, which isnt good for anyone. Not you or her.

It would be a good thing to show her this, and tell her that these are the same things that she should do for you too. The only good way to make a happy relationship is friendship and trust. Treat each other the way you would treat your best friend and yall are good!

Answer 3

Yes, actually, that was very rude. Be surprised if she's still speaking to you.

Better move... you could have said that you understnd she is busy but would like to see her more often. If after that she still didn't make herself available to you then you would have known that she simply isn't interested and moved on.

No need for the verbal attack, it's NOT the way to a girl's heart, tired of her antics or not.

Answer 4

I don't think its rude. The reason is so many girls out there need a wake up call because they do have a bad habit of playing a 'shy' girl or try to when it is really more like a 'i go for the best oppertunity' girl. If she cops an attitude over this then you really need to think if you want to deal with this. Women are full of drama then wonders why it bites them in the ***.

Answer 5

i guess it depends on how u said it , as in ur tone/clarity/ loudness of voice. But overall unless you did something totally disrespectful, which it appears you havent beacuse you dont know what the issue is, i think i would have been schocked at first maybye a little trembly too? but than grateful that you just put it out on the table and gave me an oppurtunity to drop the silent knigt card ! goodluck

Answer 6

Bordering as rude in places, but matter of factual, and passable. I think it is very clear and if she doesn't respect that alone, then there is a problem. I think it is a mature - I'm not playing games - kind of request and perhaps she will see that if you are as older friends as I think you might be then she should realise where you are coming from, and meet with you. She will if she takes you seriously and cares enough.

Answer 7

Yes it is a little rude. But at least you done what most guys don't have the nerve to do which is put yourself out there completely and boy did you ever. Good Luck though I hope she didn't take that the wrong way because it is rather insulting to her and to all women really.

Answer 8

i think u need to together with her and just sit down together somewhere and talk. tell her everything u said here, be open and communicate. the key word is communications between both the girl and guy about ur feelings and where u both want to go from there. be honest and respect one another.

Answer 9

Hope you didnt told it in a public place.
We, women do appreciate your opinion but cant say much how she would react on that situation. If, I was being told that way I will be hurt since your choice of words is a little too much. Sounds like your blowing too much steam on her.
Is she mad at you then?
Not picking up her phone?
I guess you've said too much.

Answer 10

I think it's really kickass that you told that to her. It's not rude, it's honest and it's calling her out. If she's acting this way, she deserves to be verbally bitchslapped for it, or she'll keep doing it to guys. Don't let her be self-absorbed and if she is, just tell her this crap and move on. Better girls are out there.

Answer 11

No it's not rude. You are asking her straight out... what her problem is. And i like the fact that you told her you wanna know if she is just seeking male attention and nothing further...

good for you. I wish I had a guys as straight forward as you.