What do you do if you just cant do it anymore?

Question

I just feel i cant do things anymore. Im searching hard for a job i could be good at and stick with. Im on a course the job centre have sent me on but i cant physically do it anymore. Call me whatever you like but the bottom line is im really trying to find a job. I went to speak to my doctor and i actually broke down. Im a 20 year old male and i liked to think of myself as a strong person. I dont feel sorry for myself but im drained. I think im getting really panicky also. I could be in a group of people and still just feel alone. My doctor told me to come back in two weeks and that was on thursday. I think ill go mad by that time. What can i do?

Answer 1

First of all paul w, well done for seeing your gp and taking the first step in recovery. If you feel that two weeks is too long before you see him/her again then please do go back before then. Seriously, any doctor would rather see a patient than have them in a very mentally distressed state later on. If you do feel in danger of harming yourself or like you cannot cope, call the Samaritans. They will listen to you and you can get your worries off your chest, even if you're not suicidal, it is worth a go.

Being unemployed can be a real blow to your self confidence. If you feel it would help, once you are feeling more mentally strong, you could try some voluntary work. If anything, it gets you out of the house and meeting people.

You sound intelligent and as hard as it is, need to start believing in yourself. Everyone has strengths in some areas. How about doing something creative? - if you can draw, write, paint, act or whatever join a club of some kind.

You still have the opportunity to go back to education too, you could start with a night class. This is something you can discuss with whoever advises you at the jobcentre. Not everyone does well out of school and are better once they leave and are with different people.

You do have potential, it is so hard to realise it though when you are down on your luck and feeling mentally drained. Think, just for a moment of your dreams when you had when you were a little boy - they're still possible, with time. Know that you are worth more than you currently are getting from life. Good luck x

Answer 2

I think you should go back to your doctor and explain you need to speak to someone - a counsellor of some kind. It seems you are struggling with issues and need them sorted, something only a professional can help you with. If left, the problems you are facing will only escalate - you say you are getting panicky, ie panic attacks, and this needs to be addressed before it gets worse.

Your doctor may issue you with a sick note which means you could claim for incapacity benefit. I understand you wish to look for a job but you need to sort your head out first - if you are struggling to do the course, then how can you be expected to work properly?
It might be an idea to explain your issues with the people at the job centre. They will listen and help you, especially if you have the backing of your doctor, either via a sick note or access to counselling.

It could be many things making you feel this way: depression, anxiety, stress etc. Maybe you are putting too much pressure on yourself to get a job and be a strong person, but you have to get at the root cause and stop it before it starts to control your life. A good doctor/counsellor will show you how.

If you feel your doctor is not listening enough or you can't explain yourself properly, then ask to speak to another or write down your problems/worries for the doctor to read. As you are struggling, you need help, so keep asking for it. I wish you all the best.

Answer 3

Its hard isn't it to keep positive when you are getting what you deem as no help at all. I would be considering changing to a Dr with a little more understanding of how you are feeling.
Depression.........Maybe, low self esteem and confidence defiantly. Do not rush into taking medications for depression straight away, it can be an aid, yes but its not a cure, and it is all to readily available to be handed out like smarties, told youre depressed and now go away.
The hard work has to come from within you. The only way to predict youre future is to create it, know what you did wrong today is the only way of knowing how you can improve tomorrow.Fear is nothing more than a mental monster we create in our own minds, we are not born with it. You need to take a good look at your life and figure out what it is YOU want, not what others expect of you. Remember youre "I CAN" is way more important than youre "IQ".

Answer 4

See a therapist, first. And then visit a psychiatrist. You need help. You're probably emanating an aura of desperation that comes through to the interviewer. You can't seem desperate. My husband says the best candidate for a job already has one. People who are unemployed face a sort of discrimination in today's job market.

Consider getting more education.

Consider getting in the armed forces.

Consider going into business for yourself.
Can you put up fences? Can you mow lawns? Can you paint? Anything to pay the bills.

A great resource: www.nami.org. They can help you with your feelings, find you a dr. or a therapist, help you find ways to pay for it, and you can actually talk to people who feel just like you do.

TX Mom

Answer 5

You are suffering from clinical depression and it is hard. What you need to know is that you "can do it." You need to keep fighting. Otherwise, the depression will take over.

I suggest you go back to your doctor sooner and consider asking about an antidepressant medication. Additionally, I would consider seeking the aid of a trained psychologist.

In the mean time, try exercising vigorously every day for at least an hour. Exercise increases your endorphins, which helps fight depression and anxiety.

Good luck.

Answer 6

Main thing- dont worry. Everyone goes through this sort of **** in their lives

regarding job
You might want to take a look at a book called "What color is your parachute" It is american book but it has some good advise.
The important thing is to know yourself. Try this exercise. Get a blank sheet of paper and write down all your strengths and weaknesses. Be honest with yourself. Then try to think of the things you want to do with your time. ie) where do you want to be in a few years.

Now you know where you want to go and what resources you have. You can now plan the journey. What do you need to get to your goal. Does this mean more education ? Does it mean meeting certain people who can help you ?

Answer 7

You will get one eventually. Just dont do the course. Get a new doctor the little shi! They dont live in the real world. Take care hun dont let it get u down.

Answer 8

Good God Man!... you're 20 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you. You probably want everything now, that won't happen. Keep slugging away on your course, there are plenty of jobs out there if you are willing to work hard, but you DO have to work for it. Things will get better but you have to help yourself. What sort of job is it that you physically can't do? At your age you should be able to handle anything.

Answer 9

Well if you just can't do it anymore, I'd just try to keep moving forward and be happy. When times get tough, you really got stick with it and have confidence. :)

Answer 10

get a new GP to start with....
keep doing your best...even if thats just getting up each day
you sound like you have depression but im not a GP...ask him about it to be sure.

best of luck mate...