It's funny because I support all of his wishes. Does he respect me? I had a guy that treated me so well but I relocated to Nc from Pa and before that I broke up with him because I had some insecurity issues back then. When I saw him on-line at BP I contacted him and we sent notes to each other until he gave me his number three days ago and will not answer my notes... I guess until I call him but I am not a cheat...Do you think he still has feelings for me or just does not mind talking to me? I would love to get back in touch with him now that I have mentally grown and I am ready for love...would I be wrong to assume he still loves me? Am I wrong for thinking my current boyfriend of three years is not worth another minute of my time?
2007-11-10 05:56:30 · 16 answers · asked by CHRIS W 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
three years you've been with somebody? Are you planning to marry him?
Face it, men and women have different interests and hobbies and ways of looking at things. If you expect him to go shoe-shopping with you, or whatever you like, then you're probably going to be disappointed. He's your boyfriend, not another woman friend. But, does your current bf show you he cares for you in all the other ways...such as picking up lunch for you, giving you a massage without you asking, or the myriad other ways a person of either sex can show they care for the other person. From what you wrote above, I assume he doesn't. So, three years and no marraige, no loving gestures...it looks like an easy choice to me...do you have the courage to do it?
As to your previous ex...I think he's showing that he's interested in you, and has feelings, but he was also probably hurt before, so he wants you to actually call him (it looks like he doesn't want to just be your emotional crutch, giving you the attention you need, while you're still sticking with/attached to the loser)...you won't really find out until you do. I don't think he's asking too much but wanting you to call him instead of impersonal notes.
2007-11-10 06:06:19 · answer #1 · answered by VodkaTonic 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If your current boyfriend doesn't consider your wants and needs and doesn't show any interest in your activities or interests, you can only do one of three things. Firstly, try talking to him and give him an opportunity to change. Secondly, accept him as he is, or thirdly, finish the relationship.
As for the old boyfriend, you don't say what sort of content is in the notes he sent you? Were they written in a frienship style, or a more passionate style?
You will have to call him to find out what sort of relationship he wants, but you shouldn't base what happens between your current boyfriend and you, on what he says! It would be unfair to stay with him if the ex doesn't want to get back together with you!
It sounds to me as though you don't want to stay with your current boyfriend and seeing the ex again has reminded you of what a great relationship is really like, and you don't want to settle for anything less!
There are other potential boyfriends out there, so remember that it isn't a choice of one or the other, because if neither work out, it doesn't mean that you will be single forever!
Good luck!
2007-11-10 06:20:46 · answer #2 · answered by Watsit 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your b.f. shows no interest in your activities, wants, and needs, and you have to ask if you should get rid of him?
He's not your boyfriend, he's a guy that's getting what he wants from a girl who is dumb enough to let him take it.
Contact the old b.f. if you want.
But clear out this leech who you are calling boyfriend. Even better, try going without a b.f. at all for a year. You'll be surprised. You'll survive. You'll learn something about yourself beyond your efforts to "attract" someone. If every man in the world died tomorrow, you'd do fine. You don't need some guy in your life to make it worthwhile.
Geez. If you don't straighten this out, you'll spend your life wondering if the guy who is mistreating you really loves you. Puke on that.
2007-11-10 06:03:08 · answer #3 · answered by Thinking Clearly 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You sound pretty confused to me. You might consider staying away from both of them and giving yourself some time alone. Your friend from Pa. may have moved on already and just doesn't know what to say to you. Your current boyfriend is obviously not the one for you or you wouldn't be having second thoughts about your last boyfriend and dissatisfied in that relationship. Just give it some thought, you'll make the right choice. Usually we know the answers to this type of dilema but we don't listento ourselves.
2007-11-10 06:05:55 · answer #4 · answered by thisaintall07 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is the real question your asking? Are you asking if your bf is a schmuck for not taking on any interest in you...or are you asking if it's possible this other dude may like you and if it's okay for you to talk to him? Either question, I don't think your insecurities are a thing of the past. You still have some issues to work on.
2007-11-10 06:03:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry if you have had some bad experiences with people in the church but oh well, it happens. The fact that you took it to the level of "the founder was a lying dousche bag" makes me think you are just a bitter angry person who doesnt have the maturity to realize that your experiences dont equal every mormon or the church in general. Your family doesnt shine the example of every mormon family on this planet. I know plenty of people who become inactive and left the church and it didnt tear their families apart so clearly its not the churchs fault if this incident tears your family apart. Parents have a right to be disappointed when their kids take a diff path then they thought they would and that doesnt mean they love you any less. You are making a lot of assumptions based on things nobody has even done yet in your family. You arent all mormons. Your experience does not equal the experiences of all mormons or the mormon church. If you want to leave the church then fine, its your right, but dont tell me what I have been taught or what I know or learned as a Mormon. Dont tell me that your experiences equal how all mormons are raised or how church is for all mormons because I didnt experience any of those problems. I was NEVER told to stay away from non mormons. My best friend growing up was Catholic. Nobody ever shunned inactive family members here. Yeah some people spread some rumors in HS about other people, but hello, teenagers do that, and nobody, esp adults in the church took them very seriously. I was never taught to not investigate parts of the church or had those "anti mormon" stories hidden from me. I was fully aware of every anti mormon criticism and argument growing up. I never had roommates try to control my life. I never had mormon friends try to manipulate my behavior. Your experiences are not every mormons experiences. They are YOURS. Get over blaming the church for all your problems and stop making assumptions about how your parents feel or you will become bitter and angry and resentful and you will have nobody to blame for that but yourself. Whenever you get a group of people together that all have the exact same beliefs then human nature tends to step in and you will get some obnoxious situations. I could never live in Utah. I have not had the best experiences with Utah mormons. They can be jerks sometimes because they dont have the kind of diversity that helps to foster a better acceptance of others and we are talking about communities where everybody knows everybody elses business. Your experiences could have been the same in any smaller town across the country, regardless of religion. edit lol why didnt I look at the persons profile brand new account, negative points yeah I just wasted my time on a troll, oh well
2016-03-18 01:33:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart....do you want to pursue the other guy to see if there's still something there. If so, do it. There's nothing wrong with giving the other guy a call and talk for a while. If things go good, then sit down with your current beau & break things off with him. It's not fair to try to have your cake & eat it too.
2007-11-10 06:02:14 · answer #7 · answered by mardix27 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't settle for second best.......you know there is better out there.
Contact the old boyfriend and see how it goes.
Not like your married to this new guy........this is what dating is all about.
Find your true love that treats you well and you do the same for him.
Best of Luck
2007-11-10 06:01:00 · answer #8 · answered by bigthinker 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You would be wrong to assume anything. You never know what other people think. If you want to talk to him then you should give him a call. It's a good sign that he gave you his number. If he didn't like you and didn't want to hear from you he wouldn't have done that.
2007-11-10 06:01:18 · answer #9 · answered by Vince R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i understand what u are going through, becuz it has happened to me. you ex-boyfriend might still have feelings, but they might not b deep. he gave u his number, because he knows that his ex-girlfriend will not have any problems with him, and he will try to G (game) you, and your gonna fall for it because your in a vulnerable stage right now. but dont move back, move forward.
no your not wrong for that, because like u said, he doesnt show interest. sit down and have a talk, and tell him what u want. if shyt dont change, *** him. if u still feel the same way if shyt change, *** him. that just means your not interested anymore, and you dont need to have the extra baggage.
****BUT DO NOT GO BACK TO THE EX**** You had to relocate, and you said you felt insecure back then. you probably felt insecure because of him, but dont know it. going back out with him will just bring all the insecurities back. i wish u the best of luck boo. hope all is well.
2007-11-10 06:06:41 · answer #10 · answered by S-Dot 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋