Coping at a wedding without alcohol?

Question

I have a wedding next week and weddings are a typical drinking session. However I have given up due to having a bit of an alcohol problem, I've been of it 6 months or so and this is going to be a real test for me and I don't want to fail. I don't want people knowing I had a drinking problem, but everyone will be offering to buy me drink and there is only so many cokes you can drink. If you don't accept they think you are being rude, so I don't know what to do. I don't even want to go to it because of this but my wife is making me.

HELP???

Answer 1

Stay home!! Your wife should support you in your effort to control your alcohol problem.

Answer 2

First of all, congrats on taking the bull by the horns, and quitting alcohol. Many people would let things get much farther out of hand before realizing they have a problem.

As for the wedding: just say "no". It's really that simple. Whether the other guests are relatives, friends, or total strangers, they will respect your decision not to drink. A simple "no thanks, I don't drink" will suffice. How can anyone take that personally, or consider it rude? It is nobody's business but your own.

If that makes you uncomfortable, you can try using a legitimate-sounding excuse. "I'm the designated driver" is a very acceptable way of refusing alcohol, especially nowadays (I don't know where you're located, but around here, it's highly respectable to be responsible about drinking and driving).

You might also try the "I'm taking medication, and I can't drink" excuse, if you feel you need to go that far. Just be prepared with an ailment, in case anyone asks.

Answer 3

Usually weddings have open bars so it's not rude if you turn down a drink..( it's not like that person is offering to buy you one.) Be confident and don't worry about it.. because if you worry you will become vulnerable to making a bad choice. Stick with Mocktinis (Drinks that look alcoholic) Like coke with a lime on the side - O.J - Really any juice or soda with a lime will work. Good luck and don't do something your going to regret.

Cheers.... ... I mean ... You know what I mean! : )

Answer 4

I don't think you are the bad person half these people are making out in your answers. You are simply human. You have to WORK at long term relatonships and once you have children it does change us women from being girlfriends/wives to MOTHERS. It sounds like you have fallen out of love with your wife and found this other girl just at the wrong time when things were going wrong with your wife. I think it is unrealistic to think the knew lady will solve your problems. If you leave your wife for her one day you will wake up in a different house in a different bed with a different woman but the same problems. Try and work it out with your wife if you can before you do anything drastic. Leaving her would not make you an evil person and the children will also be okay and get through it... but don't take the easy option. Try and work it out if you can. You married her once so there must be love there somewhere. It was good of you to be honest and tell your wife about the other woman and to stay with her until christmas like you are. just try and give it one last shot before you leave. She has probably given up on her appearance because she id down, maybe postnatel depression. Tell her you love her. Get counciling. Sure you should follow your heart but you should put your childrens hearts before you and i am sure they would love to know dad did all he could to stay with mum. xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Answer 5

Saying "no thank you" to a drink being offered is not rude. Instead of drinking a lot of cokes just keep one in hand. When some one offers to get you something to drink, just hold it up and say "i'm good" it is simple.

Answer 6

oh good for you! Just keep a coke in your hand and when someone ask to buy you a drink say you already have one but thanks. Also you can dance a lot and who has time to drink then. If you don't like that you can always tell them you are taking an antibiotic and can't mix it with alcohol.Best of luck to you on this,you will reap the benefits if you stick with it.

Answer 7

You could volunteer to help out with something at the reception that will keep you very busy, and allow you to refuse drinks based on the premise that you are in the middle of something and need to stay sharp.

Or you could also keep ordering Shirley Temples or have glasses with ginger ale in them or a martini glass with water in it and other people will see you with it and not bother offering to get you a drink because you already "have one"

Answer 8

I have a drinking problem and people respect that I choose not to drink. But if you don't want anybody to know just tell them you don't drink anymore or that you're not drinking today, doesn't matter why. You can always make something up, just don't make a big deal about it when you say it. (something like -- ah, I don't really drink anymore -- or I don't feel like it right now) -- It's nothing to be ashamed of, embarassed of...

Answer 9

Tell them you are on a diet or a fast. That you've given up all alcohol for a period of time so that you will lose some of that beer gut.

Or tell the truth. If they are your friends and you say "I gave it up because it was becoming a problem" they will understand. A close friend of mine did this about two months ago and it never occurred to me to judge him. I supported his choice and we've continued to hang out.

Answer 10

Keep a drink (like coke or tea) in your hand at all times. That way, people won't offer since you already have one. Maybe that will work.

Answer 11

Well not everyone drinks and people know that and understand that all you have to say is if someone offers you something such as alcohol just say oh no thanks i dont drink. that easy i dont think anyone is going to hold you down and make you drink it. remember your in control of your own actions with this.. its your choice to say no.