i fell in love with a nigerian he married me ,we share the same house at my expense we dont live as man and wife he will not contribute to anything he says he is here to earn money only making use of the visa he beats me physically and emotionally he has isolated me from friends and family am only able to go to work am so afraid please help me
2007-11-09 23:30:01 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Immigration
Divorce him.
2007-11-09 23:34:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well,obviously a marriage of convenience for him but not for you as you say you love him. Do you still love him ? Are you ready to leave him or do you love him enough to put up with the abuse ? If you are not ready to leave there is not much can be done. Likewise if he has strong emotional hold over you. Do you own the house or is it rented ? I would imagine your situation would become much more dangerous were you to leave, which would be the most sensible option, but are you sensible ? If the answer is yes then you should develop a cool headed leaving strategy. Get what money you can together and get out. You may need to leave the area and change your job. One thing is for sure. If you attempt to throw him out the house I think you will have real problems. Don't expect too much help from police. My girlfriend had lots of problems with ex husband ( smashed up her car etc. ), police told her they could do nothing until they had the evidence of an actual physical assault on her by him !!! Good Luck, and be more careful who you fall in love with.
2007-11-10 02:15:50 · answer #2 · answered by ketkonen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm pretty sure what is doing is illegal. You can not marry someone just for the purpose of settling in another country. Report him. I would go to a battered woman's shelter and I'm sure you would get some help with the process. Call an emergency help line if you help locating a shelter. You have to get a way from this man. I'm sure immigration would be interested in this fellow, and let's not forget that you are being assaulted and that is a crime.
I'm sure you are very afraid but dig deep and you will find all the courage you need. Please reach out and ask for help.
2007-11-09 23:42:12 · answer #3 · answered by Choqs 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Call the police, change the locks and then report him to the home office. Use the phone while you are at work, if there isn't a phone there you can use borrow someones mobile. You need to make the first move so that you can get the help and protection you deserve.
2007-11-10 16:03:25 · answer #4 · answered by freebird 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, the first issue here is about the violence. PLEASE get out, there are women's refuges that can help, or go to the police. Check:
http://www.crimereduction.homeoffice.gov.uk/domesticviolence/domesticviolence40.htm
You should take as much cash and personal documentation as possible. Is there anyone you can confide in at work? Maybe you could arrange for them to accompany you when you take your things, or when you call the police to help. You will find the police usually quite sympathetic nowadays, unlike in the past.
The thing that matters is your safety and your self respect. Let police and immigration worry about his immigration status. personally I hope he is prosecuted and goes inside before the issue of deporting him comes up.
Good luck.
2007-11-10 08:25:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unilateral love---and convenience only for the man?? what the hell are you doing in this so called 'marriage'??
Get him thrown out of your home and divorce-- sooner the better.
Or is it that you are stuck in this country-- dont want to leave it-- and your visa is dependant upon you being married to him??? If that is the case- you are in serious trouble-- and need to consult immigration lawyers and Marriage counsellors ASAP.
2007-11-09 23:40:57 · answer #6 · answered by kapilbansalagra 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
some have given you the advice of a phone number and i say phone that number and talk to someone and get out of this horrible marriage. i am sad to hear you meet and feel in love with such a horrible man. doesn't matter what nation he is from he is a horrible man and you as any woman are man do not deserve any of this rubbish. so do as they say and phone that number and go to the police. you have rights, the most important is to be safe and happy.
2007-11-10 03:01:06 · answer #7 · answered by BUST TO UTOPIA 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Call the police and tell them about all the abuse that you have encountered with this guy. Get help from your local agency of Violent Acts Against Women, Violence Against Women Act.....etc....
Call the immigration and have him deported. Divorce him. Don't feel like you can't do anything! You have lots of support groups in your area that can help you starting with your local police station.
2007-11-09 23:53:45 · answer #8 · answered by summerrain 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go and see a lawyer, I am not sure but if your marriage is going bad in such a short time you could divorce and maybe he will have to return to where he came from, just being married does not give automatic residence any more, but check it with a lawyer as I am not sure of the details
2007-11-09 23:48:44 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
for a start go to the police about him beating you, they will hold him in custody and mention the fact he has said he is only here to make money and has used you for a visa, the home office will then hopefully kick him out
2007-11-10 21:34:55 · answer #10 · answered by vdv_desantnik 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you truly know what you have to do. No one should have to tell you and really you shouldn't need to ask.
The first thing you need to do is tell one of your closest friends or a member of your family, that you completely trust. They can't intervene even if they want to and they have to know this. You need to sort out a plan of how and when to leave him and stick to it. Even if you think you still love him, he doesn't love you. You must think of yourself. I hope that everything works out for you. Keep safe.
2007-11-09 23:56:27 · answer #11 · answered by moomoo 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋