Jokes anyone..................?

Question

i want some good YO MAMA jokes BLONDE jokes.THANK YOU

Answer 1

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.

After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.
"Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were like killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, "Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!"

I'm like... Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!?!?!?

or you prefer shorter blonde joke?

Q: What do SMART Blondes and UFOs have in common?
A: You always hear about them but never see them.

and this...

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who tried to blow up her husband's car?
A: She burned her lips on the exhaust pipe.

Answer 2

yo mama so big, she had to fed ex food to her stomach.
yo mama is so stupid she asked for a refund on a jigsaw puzzle complaining it was broken.
yo mama is so ugly she makes Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt
yo mama is so ugly she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure!
yo mama is so fat when she steps on the Weight Scales it says...'to be continued'...
yo mama is so fat when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time.
yo mama is so fat people exercise by jogging around her!
yo mama is so fat she could be the eighth continent.
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a blonde walks into a store and asked if she could get a tv, but the manager said "sorry, we dont serve blondes."
so she dyes her hair red and goes into the store again and asks for the tv but the manager said "sorry we dont serve blondes"
so she dyes her hair brown and goes into the store AGAIN and asks for the tv, but the manager says "sorry we dont serve blondes"
and the blonde says "HOW DO YOU KNOW IM BLONDE?!?"
and the manager says "thats not a tv, thats a microwave..."

Q: How does a blond kill a fish?
A: She drowns it!
Q: How Do You Confuse A Dumd Blond?
A: Put Her In A Room Shaped Like A Circle And Say Go Sit In The Corner..
Q: What do you do if a blond throws a grenade at you?
A: Pull the pin and throw it back!
Q. What does a U.F.O and an intellegent blonde have in common?
A. You always hear about them... but you never see them!
Q. How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Who knows? It has never been done!

Answer 3

yo mama so fat even donald trump couldnt pay for her liposuction
yo mama so fat when she played hop scotch she went new york L.A and Chicago
yo mama so fat she put on lipstick with a paint roller
yo mama so fat the back of her neck looks like a pack of hotdogs

what did the blonde say when she opened a box of cherios??
oooohhhh donut seeds!!!
what do u call a blonde with half a brain??
gifted!

Answer 4

YO MAMa so fat the doorbell rang and she went straight for the microwave

YO MAMA so fat when she got on the scale, she saw her phone number

YO MAMA so fat she left the house in high heels, and came back in flip flops.

Answer 5

Yo Mama's
like a hardware store, 25 cents a screw
like peanut butter, cheap and easy to spread
like the town bicycle, everyone gets a ride
like a doorknob, everyone gets a turn

A group of blondes were willing to prove that not all blondes were dumb. They established a judges panel of people to ask the questions.
On the day of the judging the people started off by asking, "What is 59 + 2?"
The first blonde contestant responded by saying, "57?"
The rest of the blondes said, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"
Then they asked, "What is 15 - 5?"
The blonde responded, "20, right?"
Once again the rest of the contestants screamed, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"
The judges decided to go easier on her and asked, "What is 1 + 2?"
"3?" said the blonde.
The rest of the blondes said, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"

Answer 6

yo mama's like mcdonalds-
over 10 billion served.

yo mama's like a 7-11
$1.69 will get you a slurpee

Answer 7

When i was in Colorado a few months ago, they had the biggest avalanche warning ever!!......then they realized it was yo mama skiin....

Answer 8

Yo mama's so poor she can't afford to pay attention!

Your momma is so fat, she climbed in the Grand Canyon and got stuck.

Yo moma's so fat the only time she sees 90210 is on the scale.

Your Momma's so fat that when she jumped, she got stuck in mid-air

Yo mamma's so fat when she wore a red shirt all the kids yelled hey kool-aid

Yo mamma's so fat that when she sits around the house she sits around the house.

Yo mamma's so fat that when she steps on a scale it keeps going and going and going...........and going

Yo mama's so fat when she walked past by TV I missed three episodes

Yo mama's so fat when she steps on a scale it says I want you weight not your phone number

Yo momma's so fat she had to get baptised at sea world

Your momma's so fat when she fell over, she rocked herself to sleep tryin to get back up again

Your mammas so fat and stupid, when it was raining she used the freeway for a slip and slide

Yo momma's so fat that when the whales saw her they started singing "we are family"

Yo momma is so fat when she goes to a restaurant she has to be greased in and out of the boothes

Yo mamma's so fat she was attacked by japenese mlitary, they thought she was godzillas wife.

Yo mamma's so fat when she went on school feild trips the school had to raise fund to feed her.

Your momma's so fat she makes free willy look like a goldfish

Yo Mamma's so stupid that she got run over by a parked car.

Yo Mamma's so stupid she blinked and got lost

Yo Mamma's so stupid that when I told her we needed gas for the car, she farted at the gas tank!

Yo Mamma's so stupid that when she goes to a movie theatre and saw under 18 not admitted, she went home and got 17 of her friends.

Yo Mamma's so stupid she stayed in the grocery store for one day looking at a can of orange juice just because it said concentrate.

Yo Mamma's so stupid she went to an antique store and said what's new
Yo momma's so fat She put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

Yo momma's so fat All the restaurants in town have signs that say: "Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Momma"

Yo momma's so fat When she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.

Yo mamma is so fat she takes showers at carwashes

Yo momma is so stupid when she hears thunder she thinks someone is making popcorn

Yo momma so fat when i tryed to walk around her i got lost.
your mamma is so fat when she stepped on a scale it said to be continued

Yo momma's so fat that she makes a sumo wresler look like an annorexic
I hope these help!!!!