I am 15,pregnat and will be keeping the baby. The baby's birthfather left me, so I was going to be raising it alone. BUT then this guy that has always been a good friend has asked me to marry him. He is 18, but is willing to make the comitment. I want to mary him. He was going to be my baby's GodFather but if he could be a Daddy to my baby, I'd like. So, can I get married now in the state of Massachusetts or do I have to wait?
2007-11-09 08:49:37 · 7 answers · asked by Justine 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
He gave me a ring and everything. It's not big, but it's nice.
2007-11-09 08:55:01 · update #1
My mom aproves of it. So w/ perantal permisson.
2007-11-09 08:57:55 · update #2
My dad and mom are divorced and I do not know where my father is. I haven't seen him since I was 2 months old.
2007-11-09 09:06:07 · update #3
I am not giving up the baby! I will raise it like I should. I know what to expect, I've read books and my mom has told me and if this guy won't help, she will!
2007-11-09 09:19:11 · update #4
Oh dear. Marriage is a huge deal. Pregnancy is a huge deal. I applaud you for taking this and trying to be a responsible adult about the whole situation.
I am 25 and work at a divorce law firm. I've seen so many marriages go down the hole because the foundation to which it started on was weak to begin with. Without knowing your history and the obstacles you are now facing, I think you should consider your life ahead. It is hard to please yourself, harder to please your child, and so much harder to please a husband. If you are a family person, the transition wouldn't be so hard, but at the same time, I urge you to reconsider marrying at this age. This 18 year old also has his whole life ahead of him. I give so much respect and admiration for a man who picks up where the child's father left off. Please remember that things could get complicated if or when the two of you starts to have relationship complications. If there is just one reason why you two will be married (the child), then I would urge you to politely decline the proposal. What if there is a miscarriage? Would you still get married? What if the baby has birthing complications? Do you both agree on how to raise a child?
I would politely decline the proposal for your sake and his. You are so young and more responsibility at this time would just be too much. Request again that he should be the Godfather and if things get better when you turn 18, then by all means, get married. Just not right now.
2007-11-09 09:15:26 · answer #1 · answered by BABY 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Most states the legal age for marriage is 18, 2 states it is not. Nebraska it is 19 and Mississippi it is 21.
Some state also will waive this if pregnancy is involved but this still requires court approval.
For Mass:
If either party is under 18, a court order from a probate or district court where the minor resides must be obtained before the marriage intentions can be filed.
So you would need the courts permission, not your parents.
http://usmarriagelaws.com/search/united_states/massachusetts/index.shtml
I would suggest to wait until you are both older. Have a long engagement. Lots of things can change as you mature. It's great that you want to be a responsible parent, but don't feel like you have to get married for the sake of the child.
Good luck!
2007-11-09 20:35:48 · answer #2 · answered by Reba 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Under 18:
If you are under 18 years old, you will need a court order from either a probate court or district court in the locale where you live in order to apply for a marriage license.
I still think that you are to young to get married. I apploud you for wanting to take resposnibility of your actions. Getting pregnant and keeping the baby BUT I think you are to young too raise a baby.
Can you really meet the demands that come with rasing a child? How are you going to buy all the things that a baby needs? IF you get married you cant rely on mommy and daddy to pay for it, and even if you dont get married you shouldnt rely on them to pay for things.
My suggestion is to give the baby up for adoption so that the baby can get the proper love and things he/she needs. Dont mean to be rude but you are in no shape age wise, money wise or maturity wise to raise a baby. Do whats best for the baby and put the baby up for adoption.
Edit- but your mother shouldnt have to take care of YOUR mistakes. YOU made the mistake to have im guessing unprotected sex and YOU got pregnant. Therefore your mother shouldnt have to take care of YOUR baby. My guess is that deep down your mother is a little hurt that you got yourself into this mess at 15. You cant even get a job in most states at the age of 15 so how are YOU going to pay for the things that YOUR baby needs?
So you have read some books that doesnt mean you know what you are doing. I can read books on how to be a surgen does that mean that i can be a surgen? NO you are TO YOUNG to have a baby!
2007-11-09 17:17:33 · answer #3 · answered by Whit 4 · 3⤊ 2⤋
I think your making a terrible and stupid mistake. I don't think you'll realize it until your 25, and it will be a sad day.
However, to answer your question. Quote from refernced web site.
"If either party is under 18, a court order from a probate or district court where the minor resides must be obtained before the marriage intentions can be filed."
2007-11-09 18:31:43 · answer #4 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
generally you have to be 18, some states allow younger with the consent of parents. it's nice that your friend is wanting to take care of you, but you need to understand that getting married isn't going to fix any problems for you, in fact it may make things worse in the long run. you don't have to be married to successfully raise a child, and jumping into a marriage when you're not ready for it is only going to cause more heartache for you and your child.
2007-11-09 16:57:58 · answer #5 · answered by LoriBeth 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you are too young. The youngest you can be is 16 and you will still need both parents to consent. Not just your mom but your dad too. If they are smart they will say NO and you will need to wait until you are 18.
Marrying this guy just so YOU can have a baby daddy is not fair to the baby or the guy. You could always give the baby up for adoption but you are choosing to raise it yourself. Fine. Then be the grownup you thought you were when you made the baby and deal with the consequences of your choice....ie. single mother.
Even if you sneak off some place that will let you be married now it's not going to be legally recognized anywhere else.
2007-11-09 16:58:37 · answer #6 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 0⤊ 6⤋
Without parental permission, you must be 18.
2007-11-09 16:56:29 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋