My husband and his brother work together. They are the only two boys in the family. And his wife my sister in law and I stay home with our children. We get along, like talking and stuff but I really don't care for her as no one in the family does. But we still treat her like we would want to be treated. You know you always have one in the family that is just goes on about what they have as for money and possestions and I hate that. But anyways, at the boys work they got for the first time a women worker. This is a mans place so this is different. My sister is law said that her husband says theres a hot women there now and just joking around how everyone likes her, haha, but you can tell it bothered her. Well, my husband said that is brother has been none stop flirting with her. Every time she comes in the office picking on her, he was smoking with her and she had his warm her hands, playing aroung like but defently flirting. And she flirts back. She is in the middle of a dovorce.
2007-11-09 02:33:14 · 23 answers · asked by mamato5Boys 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
The thing is my sister in law wouldn't have a problem telling me if it was my husband because she is evel and would want to hurt me. just to get to me. But in a way I would want to know because it bothers me to no end that what if it was my husband. I would be so sick to know that he was even touch another women. I wouldn't want to make my borther in law mad at me for telling her. So what would you do? I hate for this to just happen and for her not know. Thanks for your help!
2007-11-09 02:36:43 · update #1
First off, you need to consider that it is your husbands brother that is doing this thing. Your husband has to work with him everyday. Does your husband want you to tell the sister-in-law? It will certainly have an impact on your relationship with your brother-in-law and quite possibly on you husbands relationship with his brother. In the interest of your marriage, which should take precidence over that of your brother and sister-in-laws, I recommend that you discuss this and get the feedback of your husband first.
Secondly, if your husband agrees that something must be said I would advise that your husband talk to his brother first. He could suggest that the flirting may be misunderstood by a woman that is going through a divorce. In this way your brother-in-law is given the chance to explain his actions. If they are innocent and just co-workers getting to know each other then there is no reason to alarm his jealous wife. If his intentions are beyond playful, then it seems it would be his responsibility to let his wife know he is unhappy and not yours.
I think that by telling your sister-in-law directly without the above considerations you are putting your own marriage as well as hers in a possible unnecessarily difficult situation.
2007-11-09 03:53:55 · answer #1 · answered by Terry2fish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you would want her to tell you so you could know what your husband is doing, than don't you think you should tell her. It doesn't matter if you love her or not, she is still family. I would want to know if my husband was flirting with someone at work. Just give her a heads up so maybe she can nip it in the butt to save her marriage. Better to know now than to find out when things possibly get more serious between your brother-in-law and this other woman.
2007-11-09 10:48:16 · answer #2 · answered by Marra's mommy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What would you tell her? Your hubbie is flirting with the new office cutie? All that would do is make you the bad guy to your husband for betraying a trust (I assume he told you this with the assumption you would keep it to yourself), your brother in law for being a tattle tale and believe it or not even the sister in law you already dislike because she will more than likely take the word of her husband over yours. No, I would keep my mouth shut and try to set it up so she sees his naughty behavior for herself. Unless there is undeniable proof
of wrongdoing, you will only put yourself in a bad light by blowing the whistle! Good luck with this. Also, your husband works with this little kitten too.....keep an eye on her, I don't like what I am hearing about this woman.
2007-11-09 10:44:05 · answer #3 · answered by sky64 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly I dont think you should tell her. You dont no whats going on. You no he is flirting. I flirt its a natural human thing. The point in telling her would be if you knew something happened and that would have to be your husband you her and her husband sitting down and talking about it. But until you actually no its going further then flirting you are gonna be hurting more then helping. With something as delicate as a marriage could be ruined make sure all your bases are covered and you are knowing not guesing at the outcome. That protects you from being the one who tried to ruin there marriage.
2007-11-09 10:39:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, this is a tough one. Even though you don't care for her, I'm sure it's still not easy to watch another woman go through that and not even know it's going on.
In my opinion, I would talk to your husband about it and have HIM talk to his brother about what's going on. If you said something to her then that might cause problems between not only your brother and sister in-law, but between he and your husband as well. Your brother in law may get mad at your husband for telling you and that could just get ugly.
So no, I would not tell her.
Good luck.
2007-11-09 10:42:38 · answer #5 · answered by Rosie19 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Reality Check Time ;)
NO ONE including your husband or wife belongs to anyone. The heart is the only thing that decides that with good chemistry. Alot of people MARRY for the wrong (EGO) reasons. Sis in law is a perfect example. Ego = married for money probably. Look up soulmates, vs ego love and the 3rd & 4th etc dimension living. This will summarize the whole thing for you ;)
Reality is a beautiful thing to grasp for some of us......
2007-11-09 10:39:11 · answer #6 · answered by renosgirl2006 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, you tell him. He is the one doing the flirting, so he is the one that should be told that it could ruin his marriage if he continues. The only thing telling her will do is make for hard feelings. A woman, can tell when her husband is interested in some one else, so clue him in and let him know that someone that is not kind will let her know, maybe even the other woman. After all she is going through a divorce, and misery loves company.
2007-11-09 10:39:49 · answer #7 · answered by LIPPIE 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you mean should you tell the sister-in-law-I say no-maybe brother-in-law is testing the waters and looking for something better. Or just having fun as an outlet because he really doesn't like SIL either. I say leave that one alone!
2007-11-09 10:38:12 · answer #8 · answered by momof4kidz 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In the words of the late great Ann Landers MYOB! Who cares what she would do? If she told you your husband was doing it, you could work that out with him. If you tell her its going to get your hubby in a crack with his brother, then hubby's going to be ill at you. Let it go, its not hurting you.
2007-11-09 10:44:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call out your bother in law. Tell him to think seriously about what he is doing. Let him know you will not support or cover for him.
Then think about telling her. She will probably blame you, but it doesn't sound like you would care.
2007-11-09 10:45:39 · answer #10 · answered by J L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋