How a I suppose to raise a baby at such a young age?

Question

What if my boyfriend leaves me?he tells me that he's gona be ther.But how am i suppose to know that.His father left him when he was a baby.I also tried saying to give him/her up for adoption he tells me no because he wouldn't of liked to bbe given up for adoption.he would kill his mother or father that gave him up.Knowing that they are not dead and just gave him up.I told him its not his descion its mine.I have to sit there through nine months and have to hear my mother and families opinions of me.I'm so clueless.

Answer 1

i was a young mother. i got pregnant at 17 and it was so hard for me. I kept her. No adoption or abortion. She was a part of who i was. When you get pregnant unwed or very young the true reality is hes not gonna stick around. You are sitting there thinking adoption. You are gonna hold that baby in your arms and you are gonna just know this little miracle needs me. he/she needs my love and support. Your baby will look in your eyes and you heart will melt and you will realize it is possible to love something/someone more then you love yourself. You will work hard everyday to bring home money so your baby will be fed and clothed with a house to live in....And after a while you will realize that you need that baby as much as that baby needs you. life will be hard but life is hard with or without a baby. you will make it. you will take each day as it comes and cherish the times spent with you and the baby..the one who will be missing out is your boyfriend because you got the best part of him and he/she will be arriving soon

Answer 2

Firstly build up the courage to tell your mum, you need to tell her. She will be upset and cry and so will you but then when the that is over you can sit and talk to her about what you want to do. Don't let anyone push you into making a decision that you are not happy about. If you decide that you are keeping your child then you have to think thoroughly about how it will change your life. You will have lots of sleepless nights and wont be able to go out with your friends much. There is so much to think about. Make sure that you will get help from friends and family and if you can then stay at home with your mum rather than thinking about getting your own place.
Its tough being a young mum as i know, I was 16 when i had my first child and i went rushing out to get my own place and found it really hard but i got through. My oldest is now 12 and hes a good boy. There is nothing saying that you wont make a good mum but it is much easier when your older. I didn't have a partner through most of the time with my youngest but you have to think that if yours does leave you are you willing to bring your child up on your own?
I don't think that your family will sit judging you but they will have to get used to the idea and it may take some time but in the end whatever you decide, I'm sure they will all support you.

Answer 3

I think you already know the answer to your question, dear. I am sorry for what you are going through. But your first thought has to be for your baby now, that little person is dependent on your decision. The babies father is being a irrational here, if he had been adopted he would have had both parents and a better start in life. To say he would have killed his bio parents for giving their baby a better life is over the top and totally irrational and shows he is not mature enough to care for you and the baby. I am guessing his mom had to struggle for their survival, meaning she seriously limited her options for an education and obviously those of her son. Talk to a counselor that can offer you options. Really think about it, and remember your decision will affect not only you and your baby but your parents who often have to help out with money and child care.
Finally, its too late to lecture you, you already have found out abstinance or at the very least you need to practice safe sex. Do not put yourself in this position again

Answer 4

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? I will tell you that I had my first child at 27 and at times I feel too young. This is a big responsibility and there is no guarantee that any guy is going to stick around...You can kiss those days goodbye of picking up and going when you feel like it, taking a nap if you're tired, or deciding to go out last minute when all of your friends are. Having a child takes up 100% of your time. If you are having any second thoughts don't ignore them. There are places you can go for help with termination of the pregnancy or adoption. The last thing you want to do is bring a child into this world that you are going to resent. Hope this helps, good luck*

Answer 5

♥ Honey regardless of how young you are right now, this baby is on the way. Hopefully your boyfriend will step up to the plate and be a man about this situation, but if he doesnt you will still be pregnant and there will still be a beautiful baby born. There is no way of knowing for sure if he will stay or not... just take it day by day and let him prove to that he will be there [[as he stated]]. Try not to stress... just surround yourself with positive people & opinions and know matter what you'll have the support you need. Good Luck!

Answer 6

Well Cookie,
I can understand your boy friends feelings and concerns. On the other hand, you are right. He doesn't have to go through the pregnancy or delivery like you do. At any point he can walk away and/or deny the baby is his. There is also much more of a stigma attached to a girl who is pregnant than a boy who got a girl friend pregnant. Also once the baby is born, more than likely (stereotypically) you will bear the most responsibility of caring for the child.
Because of these reasons, you have to do what you feel and what you feel is right. He doesn't have to agree and he doesn't have to like your decision.
I think that the most loving thing you can do is to love your baby enough to admit that it may be better off with some one else. It is the best to be honest and if you feel you can't do it or aren't ready, to then do the best you can think of.
Good Luck!

Answer 7

First of all you don't need a man(and I use that term loosely) like that. He sending out a bunch of red flags! Be Careful! Secondly, you should have thought about having a baby at such a young age when you decided to have sex at such a young age. Did you even use protection?? Good Luck with whatever you decide to do. Just remember, this baby did not ask to be brought into this world so do what's best for the baby!

Answer 8

It is also your bf's decision - he is the FATHER of the baby. Both of you have to face the consequences of your actions, and he has every right to want to keep the baby if that is what he wants. You, unfortunately, will have to carry that baby for 9 months.

Please get the courts involved right now since you are not married - get a paternity test done to CYA. See if your family and his can offer any help. Don't be surprised if they do not. And I highly encourage you and the bf to finish school and get a college degree - your child will be better off. It is time to start thinking of that baby, who doesn't have voice, rather than thinking only of yourself. You don't wnat to be preggers for 9 months, but you will be, so grow up and get ready to become a responsible citizen.

Answer 9

hey baby adoption might be the best for the bay if you are pregnant at a very early age because if you think that he is going to stick around for the long run you are going to be sadly mistaken at least if you give the baby up to a caring and loving family your child will be alright don't think of it as giving your baby up look at is as giving your baby a better life with a good mom and dad that's all because it's all about the baby and you can better your self and go on to college and get a better life foe yourself and meet you a good educated hard working God fearing man and get married and you and he could have more kids but try and find the one that you had to put up for adoption years ago and let the child know that you did what you did out of love for him/her and for give yourself if you feel guilty and move on with your life.

Answer 10

Adoption would be an excellent solution. Give the boyfriend up - anyone who talks so freely of killing his parents is not someone to keep around. Best wishes, it won't be easy. You can still find a better boyfriend, get your education, and have a way to support a family at a later date.