I have a old daughter with the guy I have been with for 6 years. He is a recovering addict but relapses often. He has taken off for days, stole from me, and is just mean. He is a good father and to my daughter he is superman. I have met a guy who is great. He has morals, a job, goals and is genuinly a good person. I really like him,however, I do not cheat and I am scared to leave my boyfriend. I feel like I owe it to my daughter to settle. If I left him he has no job, no where to go and I would feel horrible. The answer seems obvious, but, I struggle everyday. I am not happy!
2007-11-08 17:58:01 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I do have a career and go to school... I am happy with my life other than him... I know the answer already... I just needed to make sure that I was doing the right thing... I was raised to try everything to make the family work... I am tired of trying... I have so much to offer in life... I deserve something in return. Thanks for all the advice!
2007-11-08 19:31:39 · update #1
I'm sorry, but he's not a great father if he takes drugs, steals and is mean. He might be good to his daughter, but in reality, even if he doesn't realize it, and you are doing this too....your daughter is being taught that being with a guy like that is okay. Look at your relationship with this guy and think, "Do i want my daughter going through this, is this the kind of guy i want her to be with?" That should answer your question. The relationships you have will deeply affect your daughter. You owe it to your daughter to show her how a real man is supposed to treat a woman, and be a responsible father figure.
2007-11-08 18:07:48 · answer #1 · answered by Thora 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get you a job, and a place to live on your own for a while. Once you feel good about yourself, you can move on to seeing other people. You are not being self-sufficient. You are not going to make anyone else happy until you are happy with yourself.
That child's father is not a good father if he steals from you, does drugs, takes off and leaves, etc... What kind of example are the two of you setting for your child? Your child will grow up thinking that she should be treated that way to because that is how she will grow up thinking normal families live. Do you really want that life for your child?
Take it from someone that relived my mother's mistakes, even though she constantly told me that what she had done was not the right way to live. I was just used to it. One day I woke up and realized what I was doing to not only myself, but to my daughter, and straightened out my life. My daughter, thank heavens, has a normal life now!!
You are responsible for making sure that your daughter has a good life too!!! Grow up and be a parent, instead of acting like the child. That is what it amounts to. It will be tough, but you can do it, if you keep in mind how important it is for your daughter's sake.
Good Luck!!!
2007-11-09 02:11:39 · answer #2 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it looks as if you may need help in getting in that ditch...
my thoughts has always been that i can do that all by myself.
it may be that you need help in doing what you know you must do.
get away the best way you can cause neither of you are helping the other.
how important is your daughter?
your happiness?
your safely?
your future?
now you see how why you must get away......
use the web to find the help you need and get it done FAST.
wish you the best.........
2007-11-09 02:08:31 · answer #3 · answered by LITTLE_JOHN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him! For 6 years he has had the opportunity to get his life straight, but he hasn't so he is taking you for granted. Believe me. He is being selfish. You deserve better.
2007-11-09 02:01:35 · answer #4 · answered by U Wish 2 B Me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave... Trust me if your daughter sees what he does to you she would want you to leave and if not you two can alwasy share your child. If your not happy Find a way to be happy.
2007-11-09 02:01:59 · answer #5 · answered by ptftball2006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋