Is the Christian Church too legalistic on issues like Gay/Interfaith marriages? Your thoughts.?

Question

I was just thinking about it after I researched some related questions and saw some of the answers written by Christian people. A good deal (not all) of them seemed very poorly supported, narrow-minded, and most of all, completely lacking the love and kindness that Christ vowed we should show our neighbor. When asking myself why it could be that way, I concluded that perhaps legalism as pervaded PARTS (not all) of the church; it seems like a pretty decent, if partial, answer. I'm a Christian myself, and I have no problem with people being gay or interfaith marriages; I also don't have a problem with people who don't agree with those things. What I DO have a problem with is when people from either side are rude, hurtful, or give the reason of "Just because"--and honestly, it seems to come much more often from the Christian side. This worries me, because if a call of Christians is to live as a beacon of love, what kind of message are we communicating with this?

Sorry, ran out of room...I mean, if we're supposed to love people as Christ would love them, can't we let them make their own decisions? I don't think God will send a gay individual who believes in him to hell. It just doesn't fit with the image I get of a God full of grace and love. I also don't believe if you marry someone who doesn't believe, that God will condemn your marriage to fail or send you to Hell. And what REALLY pushes my buttons is the people, most often in the Church than not, that tell others they are BAD Christians for doing these things. You may have your opinions, but how dare you tell someone where they stand in their spiritual life with God? "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone". I think the reason so many people have a horrible view of Christianity because of those things; I think that those things have been greatly influenced by an extreme legalistic view of the Bible. I just want people to know not every Christian is that way. Your thoughts?

To Ben Whatsits:

I'm not negating the Word at all. I want people to see the hate that an extremely legalistic view of it can generate...from every side. And what's to say that God for me is God for everybody? In the case of legalization of gay marriage, I think the Church should either stay out of it, or accept that we earn ourselves a reputation as bigots a lot of the time. Not to say that's true, but from people I've discussed the matter with, it's what they all seem to say.

Answer 1

Could it not be a difference in responding to a Biblical Question in a matter-of-fact way and in responding to a lost soul who is coming to your church for help. We can state here how we feel about an issue but it may be a total different response when the rubber meets the road. I honestly feel that homosexuality is wrong, and I would never, ever perform a marriage ceremony between gay people, but if they have a need I would be there for them.

Answer 2

Hello, Irene:

You've seen the bumper sticker: What Would Jesus Do? Well, He never excused sin. He told the woman to "Go and sin no more." He told the church leadership that they were permitting sin, and they wouldn't enter the kingdom and hindering others. When the "domestic partner' asked for "living water', he dwelt with another problem and said: "Where's your husband."

Jesus says to us, You must live by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God."

So, if you want to be nice to sinners, that's o.k., and required. But don't tell them that they can continue in sin that grace may abound--it won't happen. And God will hold you accountable for the sins you don't reprove.

Remember the two people who were struck dead in church? And the proud Agrippa who was struck in front of a crowd? Remember the man the 1 Corinthian church disfellowshipped for immorality? Remember that the immoral will not inherit the kingdom of heaven? And remember that the tribe of Benjamin was EXTERMINATED because they would not deliver ungodly men to be punished.

Being loving is one thing, but negating one word of God will win you the plagues of Revelation.

More on this in the Bible code. See http://abiblecode.tripod.com

Shalom, peace in Jesus, Ben Yeshua

Answer 3

The Christian Right, as a whole nobody specifically, wants the laws of this country to reflect thier beliefs. They want gay marriage, abortion, etc to be illegal because their faith says it is wrong. They want the Ten Commandments and prayer in schools because those things represent Christianity. The problem with these things is that not everyone in this country is Christian. The seperation of church and state basically means that there is no state sanctioned religion and that religion alone can't be a reason to make something legal/illegal. What the Christian Right seems to want is a Theocracy where the government is tied directly to, and laws are made around, Christian beliefs.

Answer 4

You're absolutely right that we are commissioned to live a life of love! We are not to judge others as only Jesus has been granted that authority and not a single person is without sin on this planet.
That being said, people need to be cautious when deciding what the Lord will and will not have a problem with concerning our actions and choices in this lifetime. Whenever anyone says something along the lines of "my God would/would not..." he or she is creating a false idol. Unless that person is representing all of what God has ascribed to Himself in the Bible. The deception in describing God based on our own personal opinions is that we tend to create a Being that coincides with our own personal way of thinking and feeling. We need to let the Bible define God for us and not be ruled by our feelings and thoughts,because His ways and thoughts are higher than ours. Blessings.

Answer 5

Homosexuality is a mental disorder how can you not say anything about a mental disorder and let someone run around crazy like that. Thats not love. My friend is gay and I love him but he is to proud to admit homosexuality is a sinful practice. We are trying to be obedient to God and the gay pride groups are intruding on our practice of obedience by forcing gay marriage into the church. God isn't for gay marraige it is an abomination and if we want God to continue showing up to our prayer meetings we had better obey his statutes. To allow such a thing is blasphemy.But I agree with the love thing. If love is the greatest weapon to conquer than we seem to be running out of ammo! And telling someone they are going to hell because they are gay well just remmember you'll be judged by God.

Answer 6

Many people I know are bisexual or homosexual. I love them just as much as I would anyone else! They are equal. I just do not believe in what they do. I do not believe in gay marriage, but that doesn't mean I hate gay people or gay couples. I simply do not believe in the sin they commit. I hope people can come to realize that we love the people, just not the sin.

Interfaith mariages, I think would just be difficult to live with. Having seperate beliefs than your spouse,not being able to share love for your God and support eachother through tough spiritual times just seems like something I would not want to live with. I could not go on living with an Atheist husband..knowing that he would one day burn in hell for eternity. How could I live with myself?

Answer 7

The bible is the authority on this...not the "christian church" but God's word. It is sin...according to God. We as humans all have sin and fall short of the Glory of God. As Christians we are called to love one another,yes...but at the same time we are called to rebuke our fellow Christians and help them turn and go the other way. To repent means to make a 180% turn and move away from that sin toward God. All sins in God's sight are the same and have the same result...it seperates us from Him. That is why Jesus had to die for us. Whether you have lied, murdered or committed fornication or adultery, or have done homosexual acts...it is all still sin and the point is to stop that behavior go to God and ask his forgiveness...and for him to come into your life and wash you clean. Only God knows our hearts and whether we will join him in heaven or not. But he is clear that we all have sinned and if we don't accept him, then yes we would go to hell...no matter how nice you are : whether you are heterosexual or homosexual...you have a choice to make. He does not send people to hell...we choose to go... by not accepting his free gift given out of love...given with a contrite heart and asking for forgiveness. Only he knows if you have truly done that. Only he knows if you are truly wanting him to come into your heart and lead you...or whether you just want a "get out of jail free card". But if you are a christian and your friend is struggling with a sin...no matter what it is...if you love that person....you would pray for them...encourage them to turn from that sin and help them in any way that you can. If someone is a murderer and says he is a christian and just continues to murder over and over....It is no different than committing a sexual sin...over and over...like sex outside of marriage or homosexuality...to God...according to his word ...not according to me...it is sin and you must stop and flee from it. It truly doesn't matter at all if you "don't have a problem with it." You have no power...you do not have rules or criteria to be followed. If you are a christian you should think about what you have said and do ...God is the one who has a problem with sin. Thank goodness others don't get to decide our eternal fate.

Answer 8

I can understand why you would ask such a question. What in the world is the problem with two adults of the same sex wanting to make a life commitment together, sanctioned by society as a marriage, just as we do a man and a woman? Given the honored values of self-autonomy that we uphold today, why would anyone try to impose their beliefs on others, thereby depriving them of an institution that is meant to benefit not only them, but others, such as with any children born, their relatives, neighbors, and society as a whole?

Civily speaking, the latter issue concerning the welfare of our community and future generations is really what is at issue with gay marriage. It is the same issue that anyone, religious or not, should have about the no-fault divorce law, cohabitation, and any other kind of imposition, such as polygamy, on the welfare of the traditional marriage institution, because of the more likely negative consequences that one's children will have to bear as a result. This is why most Christians are rightfully and lovingly concerned, and not rude and hurtful. Yes, there are those who are, such as Phelp's ugly and angry group who profess Christ (possession? Well, that certainly is in question, since Jesus Christ is all about love). Rather, I see it mostly as the media, who are overwhelmingly bias and left of center, who hate the church, that will report on fools like Phelps, but leave out the overwhelming majority's view and approach.

If you don't think that gay marriage is about the welfare of the community and our culture, just as much as these other issues are, rather than just about an individual and equal rights issue; think again. It is clear from research that children do the best in every way with their biological father and mother at home. The children of divorced parents have the highest suicide rate, and is the primary factor for youth suicide. Single parent homes have a very high rate of misconduct and mental health issues, and blended families with just one biological parent fare somewhat better, but not even close to the nuclear family system. (Both of these types of family units are primarily due to the devastating cultural affects from the no-fault divorce law. Both these family units were few, if not rare, before the 70's.) Child abuse, both physical and sexual is super high, and the primary factor is due to the non-biological parent.

Family specialists, like me (a family psychologist) would liken gay marriage to the blended family, when it comes to children; that's if the gay parents stick together as long as the blended ones do. Yes, most gay parents will try their darnedest to be of positive effect on their children, just as most divorced and blended parents would. Of course! This is not debatable! People are people no matter what sexual orientation or marital status. However, research is also telling us that gay unions with children on average have a much shorter life span (averaging between 2 and 6 years) than blended families, which usually last throughout one's childhood. So, do you see how both the negative child-rearing issues, despite a parent's intentions, of the blended family and the divorced family come into play here with gay parenting regarding the welfare of children? Add to that research that tells us that children do more likely experience gender and sexual identity insecurity and confusion with gay parents, and you have even a worse forecast of what is to come for the welfare of our nation.

So, if you still believe that it is loving for Christians to stay out of it, what does that say about your concern over the future generations of children growing up in America? I love my country, and everyone in it, not just those who hold to similar views that I have, including gays and lesbians! I want the best for everyone, so that means taking stands out of love that aren't very popular with certain Americans. Isn't that more than OK, but actually very Christian?

Now do you understand? I sure hope you do.

Answer 9

The churches should stay out of everyone's business. They somehow feel that have the right to interpret the bible and pass it along according to their views. That is wrong. The problem is that they get away with all that under the guise of religion.

I'm glad you are able to see this. You are the beacon and are enlightened. Keep up the good work.

There is their truth and then there is the "Truth".

Answer 10

Let's not confuse legalism with standing up for the truth of the Gospel. We should always rebuke people when they sin (with love, respect, and gentleness). In fact, Jesus commanded us to do so. To be apathetic to sin in the world is not love, nor do I believe it is what God would ever want from His children.