I have an (mentally) unstable friend .. and I need advice on how to handle her.?

Question

Ok, long story short --
I have known this girl for 9 years .. (I met her through my sorority 9 years ago) .. and about 5 years ago her mother passed away unexpectedly .. she had absolutely no warning. Since then she has been extremely depressed (3 years ago she was hospitalized with a $150,000.00 hospital bill for attempted suicide) .. (she cut through the tendants in both wrists.)
She now lives 3 hours away .. but always wants to come visit me! (I am now married with a 4 month old baby) .. she is NOT mentally stable .. and I don't know how to keep avoiding the fact that I never want her to come visit.
(last time her and I were in the same vehicle she threatened to take her car over the bridge with me in it .. I am petrified to be in her vehicle!)
She has a very twisted thought process now .. she is obscessed with death. She brags about working with cadavers ... and only watches dark dark murder mysteries.
I don't feel that it would be safe for her to be around my young child!!

The last time I didn't take her phone call, she sent me a text message (to my cell phone) that said, BRITNEY SPEARS IS DEAD. (just to get my attention!) I responed with, "what"??? and she said,
"well, her career is dead" .. why aren't you taking my phone calls????
She gets really weird when I don't take her phone calls .. it becomes obscessive.
I am really afraid to be around her .. she is NOT the same person I knew 9 years ago .. but since all this crazy behavior started, all of her friends have given up on her. I don't know what to do! I can't risk the safety of my child!
how do I keep avoiding the fact that she wants to come visit????

*she really has no family ..
she has an older brother who lives 8 hours away and just got married .. and her father lives even further away and is dying of cancer.

Answer 1

While I was a teenager I had this friend who was mentally unstable. It got to a point that she became too much for me to have around. We had been friends for 10 years and she just got worse and worse. I just straight out told her that I couldn't be friends with her anymore and I didn't want her to ever call me again. We lived in the same town and after I told her I didn't want to see her anymore she would pop up everywhere I went. She never said anything to me but was obviously following me. Eventually she found a boyfriend who she could focus her attention on and I haven't spoke with her since. For yourself and your family cut off ties with this person. I know it can be scary because you don't how they will react. If anything does happen don't hesitate to call the police.

Answer 2

There is no way except you change your address and contact numbers without her knowledge of it. I know it is not so easy. It is just a thought passed over my mind which might as well passed through yours also. But really it is a very gave situation and you will have to take some drastic steps including taking help of the police.

Answer 3

You need to just decide where the boundries are and stick to your choice.

If you don't want her near your kid, keep her away.

Perhaps you can visit her half way, or go to her place to see her.

Or just drop it.

Answer 4

Your mom is sweet. do no longer marry him. he's mentally volatile. I made a mistake by utilising marrying my daughter's father. We began out with super desires, and we knew we would have cherished to have a kin. We have been given pregnant ideal away, and have been given married 3 months later. quickly, my husband's authentic nature began to teach itself. It began with him getting slobbering below the impression of alcohol on our wedding ceremony night, and it merely went downhill from there. His alcoholism became a situation all for the period of our marriage. over the years, he had 2 DUI's and an "unlawful get admission to" that have been because of him having a blood alcohol point larger than .20. (sure, .20, no longer .02!) Early in our marriage, it became got here across that he used meth, and he additionally smoked pot. He give up utilising the meth various years in the past, yet he nevertheless smokes pot. two times for the period of our marriage he have been given below the impression of alcohol to the element of passing out, and he stopped respiration and his heart virtually stopped. I had to accomplish mouth-to-mouth resuscitation on him the two cases, and he had to bypass to the scientific institution on the 1st time. He became additionally suicidal and could ramble on approximately how a lot he had to die while he became below the impression of alcohol. On one in all his DUI's, he crashed my style-new motor vehicle that my dad offered for me merely some months till now. He consistently says he does not comprehend what he could do if he lost the two me or our daughter, implying that he might desire to kill himself if I divorced him. I evaluate this to be emotional blackmail. So in case you think of this feels like the recipe for a protracted, chuffed marriage, be my customer and marry the jerk, yet I assure that's what you ought to watch for. you may desire to take heed to on your mom. She is familiar with what she's speaking approximately, and so do I.

Answer 5

First things first, do not let that woman anywhere near your baby! Do not ride in a car with her under any circumstances!
Do not let her in your house under any circumstances! Its not your fault that she needs help fast! tell her that she needs to seek help! Professional help not you.

Answer 6

I'd try to contact some of her family and tell them the situation and ask them what to do. Tell them that you care about her...but that you have to care about you and your family more.

Answer 7

Unhealthy friend. Nip it at the bud. Your child and your well being come first.

Answer 8

just tell her you dont want to see her. your childs safety should override any guilt you might feel by doing this.