Who would you give a discrimminating diary to?

Question

This is a rather long question as it has a lot of details.My grandmother passed away almost 2 years ago and the family recently learned that I had her diaries.I recieved them shortly after my mother passed away almost 6 years ago.Now,three family members are telling me that they belong to them.The reason why everyone is fighting for them is because there is some details in them of my step-grandfather abusing my grandmother to the point he could go to jail.The reason the other two are wanting them is because he is their biological father and my mother's half sisters.When mom died,she told me to not let the diaries go anywhere,but share them with anyone who came wanting to read them.I have debated on giving them to the step-grandfather,or at least one of each of us cousin's from every family.Should I just hang onto the diaries,distribute them through the family,or give them to the step-grandfather?

The reason I am considering sharing these diaries is not for entertainment,but for understanding.My grandmother was very cold to her older grandchildren,and most are questioning why.All of us older kids were told how "special" her younger 4 grandchildren were,but were never told how she felt about us.In fact,we were treated as if we did not exist.It is because of the abuse she suffered the reason she closed us off,and many need to know.

Answer 1

Before you distribute any diary anywhere, ask yourself, what good will the info do the person who wants it?Will the person be able to adjust to written negativities, or will they be devestated?Diaries are about trust and possibly other issues you may not realize and are viewed in the eyes of the law as acceptable testimony in some states. When I was a child I often journaled, it was the only vent and anger release I had that was safe from my life of severe abuse. When I went into a foster home my mother found my journal and let many read it. I lost valuable friends because parents didn't want their child around me. Even though I was a 12 year old child people made their decisions and ended up hating me all my life while my mother remained their friends. Not that your intentions are bad, but I strongly suggest that you hide those journals inside a wall or a floor board until family shows maturity enough to stop the bickering. If they cant be mature as it is, they wont be any more reasonable when they read incriminating info.Although the journals may serve you no purpose now, may be junk, later on you may find thar they speak to you in a new way and that maybe why your mom wants you to keep them. Please heed my warning that when a person is dead or even missing, in some states, a journal is accepted evidence and depending on the state and that states statues a certain crime has no time limit concerning how long a person can wait before charges are filed.So technically although the abuse I suffered as a child was 30 some years ago, I could go press charges on my rotten stepfather, in Oregon. My advice is, if someones life is on the line or a family breakup, don't share or give away the ownership of those diaries.

Answer 2

Honey, if you let go of the diaries after your grandmother had given them to you or even let anyone in the family read them youare asking for trouble. Get them to a safe place and don't let any other person get involved in reading for you will spite someone, If your grandmother wanted the contents known she would have made other arrangements. Had she wanted her last husband to know of the contents she would have revealed them long ago. Mums the word.

Answer 3

Technically, it has been left in your possession, so it is yours. Sharing information in the diaries is fine, but actually giving it to other family members for them to read for entertainment is downright horrible.

Someone's life stories is meant to be kept quiet, and not made fun of and such. It is not considered a source of entertainment.

Only share information with those who are willing to sit down and listen to you read from the diary without making any inappropriate or harsh comments.