My co-workers are putting on a baby shower this Sunday for another co-worker. I can't go to the shower because of previous plans and in all honesty I completely forgot about getting a gift to send along with a co-worker, it was the last thing on my mind. I have no time tonight to go look for something because of appointments and tomorrow, I'm in meetings all day including a lunch meeting. Tomorrow would have been the day I passed along the gift because it's the last time I see my co-workers until Monday.
Is it that bad that I will probably not give a gift? The co-worker with the baby and I were not close at all if that makes any difference.
2007-11-08 08:37:05 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
no- one should never buy a gift out of a feeling of obligation.
Just say , sorry, I will not be able to attend and leave it at that.
I would not worry, stress or even feel bad about it- send your well wishes and that should be enough- if later you see fit to give something once the baby is born, that is up to you but even that is not necessary.
2007-11-08 08:45:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is there anyone else at work you are close enough to to ask if they would let you go in with them on a joint gift? You could reimburse them for part of the price of something they already bought and add your name to the card.
If that won't work, you can give a belated card with a small token gift card, wait until the baby is born and give or send something then, or just blow it off.
Two reasons I would consider giving (aside from the obvious thoughtfulness):
1)You never know how the chain of command at work may change and you probably should try to stay on the best terms you can with everyone. It's not a big deal either way, but if this person is the kind of person who remembers every slight and holds a grudge, it could come back around to bite you somehow.
2)The way you treat others shows how you wish to be treated. I know this is sort of a backward way to look at the "Golden Rule", but it is the truth. If you ever have a shower or other occasion for receiving office gifts, people will measure what they should do for you by what you did for them (or their friends). It probably shouldn't be that way, but it is.
Take a step back and look at the big picture in this way as you are deciding what to do. Look at the perception of others as well as own attitudes and intent.
2007-11-08 16:53:54 · answer #2 · answered by arklatexrat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am thinking that maybe you should get a gift for this person as you were as good as invited weren't you?? and it is a matter of "being part of the team" at your workplace. Now seeing that you haven't purchased a gift, any hope of maybe getting a plant in a potplant from your own place and wrap it up for this person and pass it on tomorrow??? with a little gift card from yourself?? or to ring this girl and say Hi I'm ? and sorry I can't be at the shower but I have a gift for you which I will pass on on ? day??? Even if you say you're in appointments all day I feel that is no excuse and you don't have to spend much money to get a "token gift" just to be in the spirit of things. At least you should get a card unless you have already signed a group card of co-workers. A little pair of booties would be acceptable I think. You must have some time to achieve this or to ask a friend or family to buy a little something which you can give the girl either before or after the shower???
2007-11-08 16:48:18 · answer #3 · answered by veraswanee 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I think this is more about going along with the group. Technically you do not have to give a gift. However, everyone else you work with will know and it may come back to haunt you. ie: Christmas is coming up and people might make some snotty remarks. It doesn't have to be a large gift....just a box of receiving blankets and a rattle and I know you can find those at 24 hr. drug stores with a gift bag. If that doesn't work for you ask a coworker who isn't busy if they would mind buying the gift for you. Give them a $20.00. That should cover it. In future suggest a group gift that everyone can chip in for. Might work out better that way.
2007-11-08 16:55:41 · answer #4 · answered by doglover 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, forget about it, I'm sure there will be plenty of people who will go to the shower who won't bring gifts so why should you if you can't make it. Especially seeing as you hardly know this person!
Have a nice weekend and don't worry about it!
2007-11-09 08:41:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really feel like you WANT to give her a gift, just give it to her after and tell her you forgot to send it on. If you don't want to, just get her a nice card or even a gift card. It's up to you, but I don't usually get gifts for people I'm not close to.
2007-11-08 16:46:35 · answer #6 · answered by bainaashanti 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not expect you to give a gift if you did not come to the shower. It's up to you.
2007-11-09 03:17:33 · answer #7 · answered by drshorty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do people feel obligated to give a gift to someone they hardly know? Forget about it.
2007-11-08 16:42:40 · answer #8 · answered by Lunaeclipz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An invitation does not equal a gift. If you don't go, you do not have to gift!
2007-11-08 16:45:07 · answer #9 · answered by Emily E 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a gift card for cater's baby store
2007-11-08 16:41:19 · answer #10 · answered by Kℓαяαissα●•·нєαятz·•● 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋