Help me. I'm British. Veteran of Iraq War ....?

Question

Help me please. I returned to the UK on January 7. I'm Scottish to be precise. I need help, I'm mentally exhausted,I'm 25 years old. I'm mentally exhausted, I remember the worst moments of the War and I need help. I need forget. I love my mother and I need help to help her. She is 72 . Please, What can I do?. Thanks. God Bless You.

Answer 1

No offense!! people, but I am very skeptical that a 25 year old British veteran of the Iraq war, who has a Mother aged 72 and is who he really says he is.

BECAUSE it would mean his Mother gave birth to him at the age of 57!!!

I think this is some type of a scammer!!!

Answer 2

Hi,

First off - Know that people really do respect what you have done and the way you have served your country - THANK YOU.

Now for the practical stuff.

- Contact the Royal British Legion, they are not just there for the 11th Nov and for WW1 & 2 veterans. They will be able to 'pull you back in' to the ex forces support strcture and give you practical help and advice.

- Contact your Dr and explain that you need help (nothing to be ashamed of) they can put the wheeles in motion to help you. You sound if though you are suffering PTS (I was hed up at gun point so I've an idea on the horror of 'remembering') - Be aware though that IT WILL TAKE TIME.

- Contact social services and explain the situation, they will be able to help. There are all sorts of things and services that they can tap into (Home help, transport, alarm phone, home grants etc)

Take care mate and good luck.

Answer 3

I'm not sure about Britain but here in the U.S. they have Veterans Affairs. They help Veterans deal with from questions about your service record to health issues. You need to find out if you have any organization like that in the UK. Maybe try and ask the unit you were part of or look under government listings in the phone book. Here's a link I found that might help you. Make sure you go and get help. Thank you for your service! I wish you the best of luck.

http://www.veterans-uk.info/

http://www.veterans-uk.info/map/announcement.html

Answer 4

Hya, go to the med centre, explain how u r feeling, im an ex RAMC medic and i know there is lots that the med centre can recommed. Talk to ur pals who were there too, uve all been thru a terrible experience together and others may feel the same as u.
Best of luck, and dont forget, these facilities are there to help u. I know ur boss maybe a p***k- as they mostly r, but the med centre is not like that. we are there to help.

Answer 5

Hi. Im glad u came back alive. Sounds like post traumatic stress many soldiers suffer from it and have since the first ever war id imagine but it only became know in World War 1. You to get help go to your GP for imformation its very common and nothing to be ashemed of and you will get help.

Answer 6

I'm a little older. I was in the military as long as you've been around. I retired about 20 years ago. I've been there and done that. With the caveat that I'm no pseudo-scientist (psychologist or psychiatrist), I can only offer advice on how I deal with the horrors of war.

I think almost everybody comes home with some baggage.

You've probably seen things... and done things... that the average person who's never been in the military can't imagine. Maybe things that you would never have dreamed you were capable of doing. Remember, everything you experienced... everything you did... was in the context of war.

In war you know that there are a bunch guys out there with one thought on their tiny minds... to kill you... and they don't care if they die in the attempt. So you react the way you were trained to act.. to save your own life... the lives of your comrades... the lives you've sworn to protect and those which you were ordered to protect. And, my friend, that training got you home alive. That was its purpose. Maybe, the first time you found yourself in a combat situation, you were a little surprised how your training kicked into gear and you did your job almost on automatic pilot.

You are not in combat any longer. However, sometimes it seems that it's not the easiest thing in the world to get your head to realize that. The very reaction that saved your life maybe somewhat unnerving to somebody who doesn't understand. Most reactions are benign. Don't worry about them.

If, however, your reaction to, "Hi, Mike. How are you?" is to draw a weapon... that's not benign. I'd suggest you not carry or even own a weapon.

I was talking to a Korean Vet recently. He said he had PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder--a psychobabble term meaning something else the pseudo-scientists can't explain). I asked what he meant. He said that after about 45 years he still wants to dive for a foxhole when he hears a loud noise behind him. I asked him if he's ever actually reacted that way. He said that of course he hadn't. I told him he's ok. My foible is that I don't like fireworks displays... like those they have on the 4th of July here in the US. It's not the sound... it's the concussion. So I just stay away. I've seen enough "fireworks" in my career, thank you very much.

If I may, I would suggest that you talk with other veterans. They have been through what you've been through. Most of them have coped with it.

But, at least in the US, most pseudo-scientists have no idea what they're talking about. All they know is what they read in a book written by another pseudo-scientist who didn't know what he was talking about. I don't care if a psychologist/psychiatrist has talked to 100 or 1,000 or 100,000 veterans. They cannot possibly know what one goes through in combat unless they've been there. Until one has been shot at... until one has been hit... until one has carried his wounded comrade off the field... until one has held his buddy who is screaming and crushing his hand in pain... until one has had ones buddy die in his arms... until one has taken more human lives than one wants to think about... all the degrees... all the clinical experience in the world don't qualify a pseudo-scientist to judge the sanity of a veteran, or to treat him. In the US, the "treatment" is to medicate the poor guy into oblivion where he never has to face reality... and therefore never recovers.

If you're tired... sleep. If you're hungry... eat. If you're thirsty... drink (not get drunk). If you want some solitude... go for a walk in the country where all you can hear are birds. As long as you're worried about it, it means you're still in control. Just take one day at a time.

Oh... and I don't think anybody ever forgers... they learn to manage the memories.

That's for you...

I would surmise that just being there with your mother is of comfort to her... being there to help around the house. But, if taking care of her conflicts with your coming to grips with your memories, you might tell her that you love her very much, but that you need a little time to yourself. You may need that... for both your sakes.

My best wishes to you. If you wish to chat, please feel free.

Answer 7

Think well of what you have done there and find the way to be in peace with what you have done by helping others and go to see a specialist i mean a psychiatrist , you need to speak and tell what you have done and seen

Answer 8

Until you speak to a specialist you need to go out with friends, do nice things with your mother. Generally things that will keep your mind off of unwanted things for a while.

Answer 9

i was like that after Bosnia it will take time and help when i first came home i found it difficult to talk about it your mum will not really understand as she has not been there my dad told me to get help he called it being in the badlands nightmares sweats at night butterflies in the stomach and not sleeping well it takes time good luck and keep the chin strap up

Answer 10

get on email to the veterans agency they will advise you old pal and good luck//if you wish to speak to them and they are all very sympathetic the free number is 0800 169 22 77