Is 13 Too young?

Question

Hello there, ive got a question im stuck with...
a few weeks ago, i met this 13 year old girl, we both really like each other,
But the problem is that i'm 18 and shes 13, and i dunno if its a good idea to go out with her or not, She really seams to want to go further, as shes tryed to kiss me a few times already. Which ive sorta rejected..
I know all the Age of Consent laws and whatnot, So Sex is out of the question for now..
I know some people think that 18's are usually rough n stupid, Which im not, Im a very quiet, caring & shy type of person, So i wouldnt do anything stupid.. And she seams to act really mature also, and doest clown around like most 13 year olds do, and she is probably more shy than i am..
So i guess the main part of the question is "Is it okay to go out with a 13 year old girl for just cuddles and kisses, but not sex?"
And what would you think if you saw an 18 and a 13 year old holding hands walking down the street that you didnt know?
Okay thanks dudes!

Answer 1

wait 2 years before even to hold hands

Answer 2

Think of how different you are now then when you were 13. She is still a kid, she might not feel like a kid, and she will probably continue to try to advance sexually to prove to you and everyone else she is grown up. 13 year olds have crushes on older people all the time. Do you really care about her? If you do you will treat her with respect, be a friend, not more she is not mature enough at 13 to deal with a "mature relationship". And even though you are "shy" eventually if you keep pushing the lines...you are setting yourself up for disaster-I think your gut is telling you the same thing. And in case none of that made you think- what happens when you and your 13 year old girlfriend get in a fight and she tells her parents you raped her. (Maybe she wouldn't ever do that but it happens) Even if you are proven innocent people will still wonder- why do that to yourself? I think it is nice you don't want to crush her...let her know in her own way that she is so great that you don't want to take advantage...

Answer 3

Well, I think that the age difference is too significant right now. BUT it is really something that you should speak with her parents about. Thirteen year old girls are very vulnerable and unsure of themselves. They mistake flirtation and flattery with love and caring. They are not in a position to make rational decisions about relationships, although they would like to believe they do. Take Romeo and Juliet for example (humor me okay?), they were 13 and look what they did; believe me that if they were older even by 3 years the story would be a lot different.
I believe that many men you age and older can remain celibate, but how long are you really willing to wait for this "child" to come of age. She really shouldn't even be thinking about relationships, sex, etc. for many years to come. So are you really the one that wants to be responsible for taking this young girl's childhood away from her? I am not taking sexually either, but once a girl starts thinking on an adult level, the magic of childhood starts to slip away.
I know you probably wanted a lot of people to tell you it would be just fine, but I think you know that that is not going to be the case. You are legally an "adult", even though you may not feel it, she just became a "teen" and she is five long years away from being an adult. Consider how you were when you were thirteen...

Answer 4

I think you already know the answer to this question. You are going to get alot of insults I am sure just by asking this. In public it would be absolutely unacceptable! You can't help how you feel but just about everyone is going to tell you how wrong it is. I know personally I don't look my age and people always think I am older than I am because I am so mature and have a good head on my shoulders some are just like that and she may be one of them but no one is going to except it because you are 18 and she is 13, just not going to happen. Funny thing is when she is 18 its not going to be a big deal but because she is still so young it is going to be. So my personal feeling you can't help how you feel but just know that not many people are going to except that so no not a good idea. I would think if I seen and 18 year old and a 13 year old walking down the street holding hands that she was your younger sister. So advice wait till she is older. Sorry.

Answer 5

Hi I live in a small wooden house in the middle of California's sagebrush country. The Santa Ana winds are blowing hard and I want to play with Gasoline, Matches and Fireworks. What should I do?

;-) Hey - I thought one dumb question deserved another.

16 & 21 maybe. 18 & 23 no one cares. 13 & 18!!! Are you TRYING to get arrested? Hey if she's a great person, keep in touch, but any semblance of sexuality at this point is a stunningly BAD idea.

Answer 6

Aside from all the legal issues...
The problem is not so much the age difference as it is the EXPERIENCE difference right now. Most people probably grow more (life expereience wise) from 13 to 18 more than any other five year stretch in your life. You're transitioning from being a kid to being an adult.
If she were 23 and you were 28, then the difference in "where you're both at" would not be nearly so great.

Hope things work out for the best for both of you.
Good luck!

Answer 7

If you are questioning it on here then you already know that you have major doubts about this. There is a big difference in maturity between those two ages and that is why those laws are in place. If you had a 13 year old sister and some 18 year old guy was hitting on her would you be cool with it?

Answer 8

I have 2 daughters and I would NEVER let them at 13 date an 18 year old-no matter what the situation is (and one is 17 now). It doesn't matter how mature you may think she is, she is not-I can guarantee it. And what happens if you do kiss and things get out of hand and her parents find out-you will be in big trouble. Is that really worth it? It can wreck your whole future. This is a bad situation all around.

Answer 9

personally, i think it's an awful idea for someone who is 18 to go out with a 13-year-old girl because she is exactly that: a little girl! She was probably still playing with barbie and bratz dolls three years ago.Despite how mature she SEEMS to act, I think that and 18yr old and a 13yr old are on completely different levels; and she may just be trying to act "mature" to impress you. If i saw an 18 yr old holding hands with a 13 yr old (in a romantic way) I would probably be disturbed by it.

Answer 10

If you're 18 and she's 13. I can tell you that she needs to grow up some first. I was hit on by a 17 year old when i was 13 and it was scary. I tho't he was looking to take advantage of me, the way he was touching like he knew me and we had just met. He tho't he knew what I wanted, and I found out later, I gave a look I didn't understand and was misinterpreted.
Your heart might be in the right place, but you're more mature than she is and it's a very confusing time for her right now. If you really believe you're in love, let her grow up some without pushing the dating thing.
I wouldn't try to go out with her, b/c you are a legal adult and she is not. It's a precarious situation for you and I wouldn't want you to ruin any chance you had with her, by rushing into dating her. she's really too young to date anyway... let her grow up some more. trust me, I know what I'm talking about.

Answer 11

Bad idea.

Wipe these thoughts from your mind.

Mature or not she is a CHILD and by law you are an adult. Find someone your own age to go out with.

To answer your last question, if I saw an 18 year old with a 13 year old girl holding hands, I'd think "pedophile". Sorry to be blunt, but it's the truth.