I am a 28 year old, single, straight male. I am very successful and am well educated as well. I have an excellent relationship with my family, so good in fact that I choose to still live at home (not costing a dime is also a plus). All in all, I believe I have a lot to offer a very special lady. The "problem" is that I have only gone on a grand total of 2 dates in my entire life. I never had a girlfriend or even had my first kiss yet. I have a lot to look forward to! It's kind of exciting. I have people telling me that I am going to be seen as strange because I waited so "long" to actually get a girlfriend and/or because I never moved out etc. Is that true? Why would they find that strange? Or are they just jealous that I have made wise choices in life? I always thought most people didn't get into a real relationship until their late twenties or early thirties anyway. And is there a need to move out if you're still single? What do you think?
2007-11-07 16:37:03 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Another silly bit of "wisdom" I get from people concerns bringing girls home. Bringing them home for what exactly? Of course I can bring them home, why couldn't I? If they mean for sex, I don't see how that is an issue because sex comes after marriage, not during dating. They also say we can't have any privacy. That's a bunch of nonsense as well. We can go out to dinner or go into town for a walk etc. We can go away on vacation (separate rooms or at least separate beds of course) as well. What is so secret that we have to hide somewhere anyway? LOL, I am beginning to feel like I am the only sane person left in this world.
2007-11-07 16:37:17 · update #1
You are idealistic and highly moral ... those two qualities together are a rare so that makes you an oddity. .... The fact that you're living at home admit you're successful yet aren't paying your way says you're a leech and a bludger living off your parents, if I was them I would turf you out ... maybe thats why you don't have a girlfriend .... they can't see you as being independant and providing for them in the future ... unless it through someone esles hand-outs
2007-11-07 16:43:49 · answer #1 · answered by deadkelly_1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dating and relationships prepare you for marriage/long time partnership. Sex is a responsibility and a personal choice of whether you are ready for that level of intimacy or not, I am not religious so I don't see it like that. Your social growth seems to have been stunted along the way, you definitely will learn a lot once you start up a relationship. Work on your looks (shave, get a haircut, get some new clothes) find a girl with some interests in common with you, and take her out somewhere where you can get to know each other. Trust me, girls won't want to come meet mom and dad and hang out in the family room on the first or even 10th date. Go to her place and cook dinner together, go to the movies, hit the beach/mountains/lake or other recreational activity together. It's very strange for a 28 year old to never move out and never kiss anyone, it rings to me as missing out on an important part of growing up - being on your own. It seems like your family-friendly environment has caused you to repress your sexual urges, that's just how I see it.
2007-11-07 16:50:11 · answer #2 · answered by LP 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the reason they have a problem with it is because they feel you are emotionally closed off from relationships. Personally I think you are just goal oriented and at this point in your life a relationship isn't a top priority. As far as being healthy, I don't know what is wrong with society thinking that you have to be with another person to be content with your own life. So many people fear being alone so much that they can't understand why some choose to be alone. Without a relationship life is a lot less complicated and you can achieve your goals without interference of emotional issues. When you feel you are ready for it you will go for it. Until then I think other people need to stay out of your business and allow you to be happy with the choice you have made. I say ignore the comments and opinions. Do what you think is the right choice for you.
2016-05-28 09:23:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think everyone is jealous, it sounds as though they think you are weird.
If you are happy with your arrangement, good luck to you. I personally would never go out with someone who still lived at home. Especially if they weren't paying board. Still, if you find the right girl, it won't matter.
It is not true that people don't get into "real" relationships until they are in their late 20's or early 30's. That's traditionally when they settle down and get married or have kids, but those relationships have been going for years before that. You probably won't date, get married and have a kid in the next year or two. Relationships take time. Or at least sensible people take time.
2007-11-07 17:05:23 · answer #4 · answered by Rosie_0801 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most men would prefer living away from home for privacy reasons. However if you choose to wait until marriage for sex I think that is honorable. If you and your parents are on the same page as far as you bringing female company home with you I think that is also great. You have good values and I urge you to stick by your guns. One bit of advice though. You need to get out there and get acquainted with the opposite sex or you may be leaving with mom & dad for a long time.
2007-11-07 16:49:04 · answer #5 · answered by pete 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is OK that you live in your parents' home, but having two dates only at the age of 28 is not normal. Since you have only been dating twice, you might not know how to act in the presence of a woman. Dating helps you be more sociable. You might have some type of phobia in regards to women, or at least other people might think so. People are not jealous of you.
2007-11-07 16:53:45 · answer #6 · answered by Highland 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um are you serious? move out! if your sucessful you should want to have life experiances other then living in a safe home environment- sometimes you need to push your envelope!
as far as dateing goes- still living at home says to me that you are imature and not ready to handle a serious relationship, so what about that would make a women want to date you? plus what are she going to talk to you about, yeah your job then what, ever had a bad apartment? oh tahts right no! ever had to deal with paying all your bills all on your own all in one month? oh yeah NO! so what if you do find someone to date and then you decied to get married is she going to have to be the responcible one, pay all the bills, take care of all the house problems, find a house (b/c oh yeah you dont have any practice doing that) thats not fair to the other person if they wanted a kid they'd of had one not married one!
2007-11-07 16:47:01 · answer #7 · answered by Emon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let's say you're 'unique'. There are benefits to living outside of your familial home. You acquire the responsibilities of a grown up. Bills, time management, cooking and cleaning skills. Yes, you've been lucky to extend your time at home and I'm sure your parents love you, but it's time to show them that THEY did well by raising a responsible adult. And it's probably time that they had some privacy. It's time to move on now!
2007-11-07 16:42:23 · answer #8 · answered by Grace 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ur certainly a dying breed but a precious one tho. girls wont find a lot like you nowadays. the girl who does would surely be lucky. no, you don't have to move out esp. since you're still single.
from your kind of outlook, it would be better for you to mingle with groups and associate with prospective girls because i think you want to be in a long-term relationship/engagement before settling down. much luck in finding the right girl!
2007-11-07 16:44:21 · answer #9 · answered by dotted.nose 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
grow up and get your own place to live. you should have been out on your own 10 years ago. does your mummy still wash your underwear.you do not need a relationship to live your own life. Live your life and forget the relationship. relationships can come later
2007-11-07 16:41:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋