Which would you do, put job first or your kids?

Question

I'm looking for work, and I am trying. I working with a program that helps me to get leads on jobs, but so far the job leads they have had for me have not been what I need.
I'm a single parent of 2 young kids, yes I know I need work. But I just got to have a job where I can be home with my kids.
My job coach is mad at me cause I have turned down job leads, I had to tho cause they did not fit in with my schedule with my kids too.
I'm at risk of being kicked of this program. I told my job coach my kids come first, but she doesn't think I am right thinking this way.
what would you do?
To me my kids will come first!!

Answer 1

YOUR KIDS 1ST JOB LAST. well if u go line theres jobs where u can work online and still be home. They pay good. WELL DONT LET ANYONE TELL U DIFF .THAT UR KIDS NEED TO BE # 1 IN UR LIFE.

Answer 2

You are in a tough spot. Sometimes a single mom has to make some hard choices.... yes you need to be with your kids, but you all need a roof over your head and need to eat, too.
I have stayed home with mine when I could, worked part-time, and worked full-time after my husband left. I always tried to put my kids first, but there were times when that required that I make provisions for them with loving child caregivers, relatives, babysitters, etc. when I couldn't be there.
You also need to do the math, because if you are commuting any distance (paying gas prices), and paying child care while earning minimum wage or close to it, you would be better off staying at home. If you have a job coach, it sounds like you may be in some sort of assistance program, which means that you probably qualify for free or subsidized quality child care and maybe other services, too. Maybe you could try it out for a period and see how you and the kids too, at least until you get back on your feet somewhat. It's possible that you could earn some income by offering to keep other people's children in your home, or work as a caregiver at a day care center--I have done that, too when my kids were small--it was almost as good as being with them because they were right down the hall, and when they were done for the day, so was I. Keep looking and trying and you should be able to find something that will allow you to prioritize family time.

Answer 3

Sometimes when we have little choice, we have to run with the "best of the bad bunch" - meaning, it might not be ideal at the moment, but we have to make it work.

I've been in a similar situation as you - but I had 4 kids. I didn't have a job coach. I had to find something where I could still reasonably manage my household.

I had to come half way in this process - meaning, I had to accept that my ideal job (ie work 10-3pm) was just NOT there (at that time) so I had to go for the next best option which was 9-4pm. I did so because I couldn't afford to turn the work down. I managed by seeking out friends whom I trusted to care for my kids half of the time and I used a family day care (ie care for the kids in the caregivers home) for the other half of the time. It was by far the cheapest option for me and allowed me the greatest flexibility if I needed to stay late for work.

I obviously don't know the ins and outs of your situation--but maybe you need to compromise, just a little for now, to get your foot in the door. You never know, after starting in a place you may be able to negotiate your hours so you can be at home at a reasonable time.

There are some times in our lives as parents when our circumstances lead us to the awful place of not being able to put our kids first. Sometimes we have to put work choices first so that 'in the end' our kids will come first. Seems odd--but you know, when we have little choice we sometimes need to go with the best option so at least we can pay the bills, and feed our kids.

Answer 4

Of course your kids will always come first. My sisters a single parent of a boy 7, girl 4, and boy 2. There father died in a car accident 13 months ago. She had to get a job and she works at a law firm and raises these kids with little help. You can do it! You just have to find the right job with the right schedule.

Answer 5

While you say your kids come first, how do you plan on supporting them with no job? You cannot give them the things they need with no money coming in. If you are on welfare you will not be on there for long if you are not cooperating with your job coach. My step-daughter's friend has 2 kids and she had to take a job where she could or risk being kicked off of welfare completely. Go to work for Mc Donald's. They will work with your schedule. It is also easy to advance. Managers make about $12 an hour, and once you have their manager training you can get a job in management just about anywhere and make even more money.

Answer 6

Kids ALWAYS come first, but you have to think of it this way:

You need a job that will provide munnies to better the quality of your children's lives. I don't care what people say: money isn't everything, but it does make like a hellalot easier. And there is almost NOTHING lately that does NOT cost money. Getting a job would be the best thing you could do for your kids. If you can't always be there during the week, make up for it on the weekends by spending your hard-earned cash on a trip to Six Flags or on a Saturday matinee.

Kids DO come first, but there is more than one way to put them first.

Answer 7

KIDS ALWAYS COME FIRST!!!
it sounds like ur job coach thinks too much about trying to get her money!! and not worrying about if it is the right thing.you can go to alot of websites that allow u to work from your computer, have u tried those? i would have told that job coach to get lost right there on the spot. does she even have kids? or be in your pisition, while being a single mom. find a new coach. and try the jobs that you can work from at home. i think one of the websites that allow u to work from home is called something like.... crazyfox or something. look it up on google. it could be a big help. ive heard that u can even make 5000$ a week. now, i havent tried it, but who know it might help u out.

i hope u find something...
best of luck,
♥

Answer 8

My kids always came first and I think it was the right thing to do. They grew up in a single parent, poverty level home, (and I have chronic depression problems), but they are productive, stable and happy members of society. My son has been married 6 years to his high school sweetheart and has two beautiful children and my daughter also has two children. They're wonderful people, and I think it is in large part because I was there for them in spite of the many barriers put in front of single parents.

Have you considered getting work in the school system itself? There are aide positions, bus driving positions, secretarial positions and lunch room jobs just to name a few. When you work in the school system you might not get paid a lot, but you usually get to have the same days off as your children and you get to go home at the same time as they do too.

Answer 9

I get that your kids come first, but doesnt that include providing for them? I think you are asking a lil much to have a job fit your exact schedule. You may infact have to change your schedule and routine. You cant put your kids first if you are unwilling to change things so you can provide for them. With no job, sure you have the schedule you want, but how are you feeding and clothing them? How are you buying them the things they need? How are you keeping a roof over their head?

Answer 10

it took me two years to find a career that works around my children, and it still isn't ideal, i tried to find jobs that fitted into school hours, then when that failed i tried to find work that was during term time, meaning I'd be off work when my children were off school, but in the end i had to go down the route of getting my children a child minder for after school hours, it was hard all round in the beginning, but now me and the children really like the childminder and we all enjoy the extra money that my new job bring in, don't get me wrong it can be tough but in the end single parents have to learn to make the compromise

Answer 11

im sure it is hard and i admire you for putting your kids first, your kids wont realize the sacrafices you made until they are a lot older but when they do they will thank you.

maybe just find a job where you can work the hours they go to school, or if they are young apply for child action and have the government pay for them to go to an early developement school/ daycare like pheonix schools. you need to find work