My girlfirend just dumped me on Saturday and said that she can't see us as being anything more that just friends. I was very upset when she dumped because I loved her very much and I can see myself with her and I have gotten to the point where I love her so much I want to be with her forever. I want to get back together with her but if I ask to get back together with her she is going to say that we can only be friends. How can I change her mind? Thanks for the responses.
2007-11-07 07:55:09 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm assuming you're still young. Don't worry about it. It's over. Let her go and move on. You won't regret it. There are plenty of others out there.
2007-11-07 08:00:30 · answer #1 · answered by G 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Let her have her own space. Don't call her to try and change her mind, or follow her around or keep asking her about it or begging or even just bringing it up in conversation etc. This is just annoying and will make her feel more like she's glad to have a breather after being with you. She may even miss you if you let her have her own space, and realise more what you and she had. I know this will be the hardest thing you've done for a long time, but believe me if it works it will be worth it. Then, if it does, always remember afterwards that she has her own friends she wants to hang out with too, that she needs time to herself and that it doesn't mean she thinks less of you if she decides she needs a 'me' night.
But then again, a relationship that is skewed more towards one person than another is almost definitely going to end up not being right for either person; one will feel crowded, the other will feel unloved. So if she doesn't make a move to be friends with you, or if she doesn't seem to miss you, I hope you'll be able to move on and find someone who loves you in this way. It just causes heartache to waste time and emotions on a fruitless quest. Wow, that was more poetic than I meant!
Don't know how long you have been going out, but perhaps if you're going to be friends, focus on the aspects of her personality you felt attracted to before, and use those as the basis of a strong friendship. If it feels too complicated or brings painful emotions, then don't put yourself through this; redirect your socialising to other people and places until you are over her. The feeling may be strong now, but perhaps she is right, though it probably doesn't seem like it; perhaps she sees that your feelings for each other might fade, and in this case, maybe that's a hopeful thing for you.
2007-11-07 16:04:40 · answer #2 · answered by Catherine S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to tell you this, but you can't change her mind. The only thing you can do is learn from your mistakes and move on. I know it sucks, but that's reality. And I'm speaking from experience. It took me years of dating to realize that I couldn't persuade a woman who wasn't interested in me, to give it a try. And even if it were possible, what would be the point? Why would you want to be with someone who doesn't reciprocate your feelings?
I know that none of these words will make you feel any better, so I'm sorry that you're going through this. The only thing I can say is that you're definitely NOT alone. Almost everyone at one, or more points in their lives, goes through what you're experiencing now. And it ALWAYS hurts. So do what you have to do, but try to concentrate on the things that make you happy and get out there in the dating world as soon as possible. Good luck!
2007-11-07 16:06:52 · answer #3 · answered by comic_sf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately you can't really change her mind!... I know, it's sad when someone doesn't feel the same way you do but honestly, your better off without someone who doesn't even want to be with you like that. All you can do is tell her how you feel and let her decide what she wants from there. Don't push her though because you could push her the opposite way. Just be patient... if she really loves you, she'll come back.
2007-11-07 15:59:30 · answer #4 · answered by Roxy1316 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if you both are still in the right frame of mind to discuss what happened and where things went wrong-do so- if it takes paper and pencil do so-
if she has any feeling for you she'll try and make an effort to rectify the situation.
If not maybe she's right and you should move on; it may be difficult now however in the future you'll see it was for the best--
2007-11-07 16:04:28 · answer #5 · answered by yankidee_1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change her mind. Let her go, and move on. I won't lie to you, if you really love her it will be very difficult for you to move on and get over her but in time you will.
You never know, the next best thing could be right around the corner.
*smile*
2007-11-07 15:59:44 · answer #6 · answered by *LiLy* 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There is no way to change her mind. Give her some space and let her change her own mind. Her saying that to you is a nice way of saying she does not want to be with you anymore. Try to move on. Time will heal the heart, I promise. Good luck.
2007-11-07 15:58:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, to get someone back you need to follow this rule of thumb:
You may talk a good talk you must walk the walk.....(It's not what you say, it's what you do) women are emotional..men are physical. Throw in an Image (your in love) and the Integrity and your golden.
Remember though: "Image is what people think we are. Integrity is what we really are."
2007-11-07 16:00:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like shes made her mind up.I know it's hard but for now just be her friend .Maybe she just wants to be free for a bit,so let her and if or when things go wrong you'll be there,and maybe she'll change her mind.Just be there.
2007-11-07 16:01:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
when a girl dumps you she really doesnt want to go back with you. I told my boyfriend I cant see us together he rides the same bus as me but that wasnt true I just wanted to go with another boy at my school.
2007-11-07 15:59:22 · answer #10 · answered by sweet pea 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋