Every time I take my 95 year old grandmother out she steals things. she tells me she does it because she thinks the "black people" will take it if she doesn't. Its not her fault shes racist because she grew up in a time period where that was acceptable, but its getting to the point where I can't take her anywhere because she yells vulgar racial slurs to the black people we come into contact with. How can I talk to her about his without her getting upset and beating me?
2007-11-07 07:16:10 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
It would seriously be a waste of time to try to change your grandmothers views on diversity. She was born in 1912 for goodness sakes and, as you said, she's just a product of her environment.
The stealing is another things entirely. I would simply speak with store manager when you go in and explain that she has a tendency to "hide" things so as to avoid incarceration. People are super suspicious these days and you don't want to find yourself in a situation where fingers are being pointed at you. After that, check her before she leaves the store to make sure she doesn't have anything that doesn't belong to her. The stores will, most likely, be understanding seeing as she is nearly a centurion. I wouldn't stop taking her out, however, because I'm sure it's a bright spot in her day. When you get elderly, you don't really have an opportunity to get out much and it would be really sad if she had to be shut away in her house all the time because she doesn't understand that the world has moved on.
2007-11-07 07:24:03 · answer #1 · answered by I'm back...and this still sucks. 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm very concerned for your grandma. It's true that some people from the older generation make non-politically-correct statements, but your grandma might have a more serious problem, like dementia. You should take your grandma to a doctor.
(I'm pretty sure this is fake because of the part about your grandma "beating" you, but just in case...)
2007-11-08 02:21:29 · answer #2 · answered by drshorty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simply tell her that if she can't see fit to behave in public, you won't be taking her anywhere and will, instead, visit with her at her home or your home. Her behavior is ignorant, even if she did grow up in such a time when it was acceptable to act that way. No excuses - just because she's 95 doesn't mean she can treat people that way.
2007-11-07 15:51:41 · answer #3 · answered by Empress1 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take her to South Central LA, Manchester or South London. Find a group of Blacks and tell her to say what she feels. This way she will learn it is simply not acceptable and will get her head kicked in. If she's not got the guts to say it the their faces she should keep her mouth shut and if she has got the guts the consequences will help the world.
2007-11-07 15:22:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Beating you??? LOL. She's 95. If she has the strength to beat you without breaking an arm, i'd be surprised. You're young...run faster.
Stop taking her out in public. Go to her house and read to her. Cook for her, spend time with her in the privacy of her home.
2007-11-07 15:25:35 · answer #5 · answered by Katie G 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your 95 year old grandmother beats you. Sounds unbelievable like the rest of the story.
2007-11-07 15:20:22 · answer #6 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
She is probably senile at that age and I would simply refrain from taking her out in public. Chances are, she's not about to change, after 95 years. Just avoid situations where she might behave like that. Better to get beaten by her than by a black person who has been offended by her tirade, especially a "gangsta".
2007-11-07 15:20:36 · answer #7 · answered by FUNdie 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I agree with Latte. The yelling outbursts and paranoia are definately signs of dementia setting in. Speak to the rest of your family and her doctor. It may be time for some extra care for grandma.
2007-11-07 17:03:35 · answer #8 · answered by missbeans 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her stealing behaviour and yelling outbursts indicate that she may have dementia.
Either take her out and apologise for her behaviour or just take around afternoon tea to her place and visit her.
She's 95, just love her and let her be.
2007-11-07 15:26:59 · answer #9 · answered by Latte 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Method One. Introduce her to a really nice black person to try to sway her opinion.
Method Two. Take her somewhere full of not-as-nice black people and let her run wild and see if she keeps it up much longer.
As for beating you. Um, seriously? Call child protective services on your own behalf. Or the cops. Or if you're over eighteen, just steer clear.
2007-11-07 15:20:45 · answer #10 · answered by Brent 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋