When Phoning a friend or texting them. How much time should you allow them to call you back before it's rude

Question

of them to not call back. I have a friend that I love to death but I call her and it's often 2-3 days before I ever hear from her. So making plans with her is very difficult. I text when I can b/c I know she is busy. However, now she doesnt reply to those. No it's not a blow off. she's always been like this and she does it to others. I want to some how convey to her that her actions are inconsiderate of others.
However, before I do I would like a solid time frame to give her so that she knows when to reply/return phone calls before making others mad.

Thanks

Answer 1

Don't worry about it. You already said that she's not blowing you off. Some people just have a different idea of time and a different way of living their lives. I suspect that, at least once in your life, you've not returned a call. Surely you didn't do it to spite the other person, but just because you were busy, had other things on your mind, and so forth. You're making the issue about you but it probably isn't. I really think you should give your friend the benefit of the doubt.

You certainly can talk to your friend about the issue in a calm way and work out some sort of system with her. As long as you both agree on something then it should be more clear for you in the future.

I can understand that it's hard to make plans, but you can always say something like, "If you'd like to do something with me on Friday, please text me back before Tuesday or I'll assume you don't want to go."

Answer 2

There's no point in saying anything at all to her about her return phone/text messages. In all likelyhood she will not change her ways.

I have a friend that has acted like your friend her entire life (she's 50 years old!) and it just does not sink in to her thick head that this is rude. In fact, she looks at it as SHE'S missing out on something if she doesn't find out about a meeting or party or whatever, so she doesn't think it should bother her friends. She has no concept of time and doesn't understand why it is inconsiderate to ignore phone calls for days or even weeks. She checks her e-mail about 5 or 6 times a year, yet she expects people to keep her in the loop and wants to know why nobody calls her with important news (at our age that is most likely a death).

Don't write your friend off completely, but don't stress over her inconsiderate behavior. You won't be able to change her.......

Answer 3

Each situation is different! Find out first what the reason is why she doesn't call back earlier before you go off on her. People sometimes have very hectic lifestyles so having consideration would be necessary in this case. Otherwise, if she isn't that busy and makes a habit out of not returning calls for a long time than to me it's not worth keeping in touch. Let her show more effort for you to devote time into the relationship.

Answer 4

You can't tactfully give her a deadline to call you back. I would suggest sending her one message. If she doesn't respond, forget it. Next time you want to make plans with her, try again. If she doesn't respond again, don't nag her about it. Eventually she will start returning your calls if she wants to communicate with you! The best thing you can do, as a friend, is to be there for her when she's ready to communicate. In the meantime, hang out with your other friends and don't let it bother you.

Answer 5

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Answer 6

I think ONE DAY is sufficient. I think a lot of people don't return messages, and even if you are friends it's just like that dating book "They are just not that into you."