How do you help Mentally challenged people, not know they need help?

Question

I met this young couple on the streets, in Fl, while traveling. Neither one seemed able to survive homless. I asked them the situation and both of them tired of people trying to run their lives. The catch is this. They don't belong homeless, and why refuse help when it's around the corner? I know having your life planned out for you isn't the best, but, WHY BE HOMELESS INSTEAD?

Answer 1

That's a hard question to answer, but in a way, you can understand their frustration. They've probably had people telling them what to do all their lives and now they want to live their own lives, without interference. If that means living on the streets, they are willing to accept that. Maybe (hopefully) they'll tire of it after a while and ask for the help to which they are entitled.
There was an interesting study done among the homeless people a while ago, and most of them did not want to move into an apartment, a room or a dorm. They prefered being out on their own, sleeping in alleys and little cubby holes they found for theirselves. Hard to imagine, but that was their stance. It surprised the social workers too because they, like you, wanted to encourage their homeless clients to make use of the options available to get them off the streets.

Answer 2

As a social worker with experience working with the homeless, I can answer this question pretty easily. It comes down to this:

1. The control that "helpers" exercise over the lives of clients is often extreme, similar to being incarcerated;
2. The "help" isn't all that much, rarely enough to actually permit the client to be independent.

People who have no personal experience with social services work or with the lives of the needy rarely know what is really going on. False assumptions such as those I'm reading in these responses are common, such as, "The client just doesn't understand;" or a very false belief that the client is actually receiving help when they seek it, or especially, the false belief that there are sufficient resources (money, goods, housing, services) to make a difference in these people's lives.

So, you, the questioner, see, for the first time, a couple on the streets in Florida. They are MR and probably not able to convey all the details and nuances of their experiences, which include:

Endless complicated paperwork (even if you're not MR); endless nosy workers prying into every detail of their lives; ignorant nosy workers passing judgment on every detail of their lives; complicated schedules of hearings, meetings, and for food and housing; being locked each night into crowded, hot, sweaty shelters, being separated by gender, and being forced to spend every night alone; having Jesus being pushed onto them, day after day, but not receiving any meaningful help from Christians; and, after jumping through all these hoops, STILL not getting any help with food, housing, work, or other reasonable things.

If you want somebody to not be homeless, give them a decent place to live, like you live in, not some squalid auditorium. If you want them to earn their keep, give them a good job, not just any job, and don't mistreat them because "this is all they deserve." If they are hungry, have them over for breakfast, lunch and dinner, the same one you would eat, not an institutional meal served by church volunteers with mandated prayer before, during and after.

Problem is, nobody really wants to do any of these things. So we (by we I mean you) rely on magical thinking, believing that all the people you see on the streets are beyond help, believing all the nonsense you hear in the media about greedy welfare queens, thinking that there is plenty of money, housing and services for everybody, but that "they" are just too stupid or evil to partake of the bounty.

But wait there's more: Working with the MR is more difficult than the average client, because they need more supervision, care and services than the average client. These services are in short supply across the U.S. Most states have mandated waiting lists of 2-3 years in order to start receiving services AFTER a diagnosis of MR has been made. Why? Money. It costs money to provide services to this population, and we don't want to pay for them. So we make them wait, literally hoping they will die, or just give up, before we ever have to write them a check or find them an apartment or a case worker.

And your young couple already understands all this, so they don't think that going it alone is such a bad deal, compared to the alternative, which is no alternative at all.

Have a nice day.

Answer 3

The problem is they may not have the reasoning needed to understand that help is well intentioned. No one likes to have people runnung their lives for them, but no one likes to eat out of a garbage can, either. No one "belongs" in homelessness. Unless someone gets power of attorney over these two and is leagally able to make some wise choices for them, chances are, they will remain homeless. Sad.

Answer 4

that's such a tough question to answer. Especially when it's not known what their state of mind is, or their mental capacity. There are so many resources available to people that can't make ends meet, and it's a shame they don't take advantage of those. I hope they're able to take advantage of these soon before it's too late.