Can I ask a guy out by email?

Question

My work had a new router installed at my house so I could access files from home, and I think I'd like to ask the IT guy who came to install it out sometime. I met him at my office once before he came to my house to install the router, and he spent 3 hours at my house installing it this morning. We didn't talk much (I'm shy and he spent a lot on time on the phone with customer service) but we talked enough for me to decide he's a pretty nice guy, and that we have several things in common - we both studied French in college, he went to Paris for New Years, etc. I have his email and office and cell numbers from the emails he sent to get directions to my house, but I've never communicated except by email (other than in person obviously). I know he isn't married... would it be strange to email him to ask him out? i really don't want to call (awkward - I'm shy, remember) - should I maybe send a text instead?

I don't ever really do these things, but i'm newly single and want a date!

And in person probably won't work unless I stalk him... he doesn't work for my company, he was contracted from an IT place, so I probably won't see him again at random

We don't work together...

Answer 1

I think a guy would be flattered no matter how you asked him out. A call might be more personal, but if you are shy, email him!

Answer 2

If Your Too Shy To Call Then I Think Email Or Texting Woild Be The Best Option But Saying That I Personally Think You Should Say How You Feel To His Face! And If You Go With My Advice When Ever You Ask Him, Ask Just Before He Leaves, That Way, If It Is A No, There Doesnt Have To Be An Akward Silence Because He Was Leaving Anyway!

Answer 3

Absolutely you can ask someone out by email.

Heck, there are some people who will BREAK UP with a significant boyfriend or girlfriend by email -- a practice I don't suggest and one which is very critized by many Netizens. But people still do it, so for something as innocuous as a first outing out together (and you don't even have to call it a "date"), I think inviting him by email would be fine.

I would suggest keeping it light, though, like maybe playing on your common interest in things that are French and maybe attending a foreign film in French with English subtitles. I almost married a woman born in the U.S. but who learned to speak French fluently in school and after a year overseas in Paris, and she loved practicing it where-ever she could.

A cup of coffee and a piece of pie is a fine first outing out together. Consider a museum showing or new art exhibit. Also drinks and appetizers at a local Happy Hour is casual enough and you don't have to imbibe anything alcoholic. Some "Health Bars" have their own Happy Hours with drink specials you might find interesting.

If you make the offer to go out, though, don't go for the expensive dinner and expect him to pay for yours. Go Dutch at first because your are just establishing a friendship for now. Or if it is a special event that you want to attend in particular, considered sponsoring his ticket as Hostess which is perfectly fine. As a guy, I don't think that would be too aggressive since you initiated the invitation. I actually appreciate the thought when the woman does the asking and offers to buy. I usually reciprocate too for the next outing out, even if I think only friendship is in the offing and nothing more.

Consider sending a cute e-card that captures your sentiment or invitation. Those usually get a little more attention because they perk the curiosity a bit more than just an email. If he is an IT guy, he may be OVERWHELMED with emails calling for help, so consider trying to get his attention with something a bit more unusual.

The only caveat with email is that you may not know if and when he reads your message. Some systems have a way of notifying you when your email has been read. I use an e-card service called www.BirthdayAlarm.com which is helpful because I do get an instant confirmation by email in return when the card has been read by the recipient. It's no fun being snubbed but I think you'll want to know if he got your electronic message but didn't respond to you because he's not interested or has some other conflict. Without confirmation, you may also sit in wonder, thinking he rejected you when in truth, he just overlooked it in a world of other emails and spam.

Hope this helps.

Answer 4

You know, talking to him on the phone would be more appropriate... For one you prolly will hear a long pause...(outa mear surprise but there are other things that you can pick up on in a conversation that you just can not in an e-mail.......

And even if he were to say yes let's meet up.. Would you pannic, and let him down... I've done it.... In person would be the best choice, Over the phone would be a good choice and an e-mail would be the worse choice
Good luck and let us know what he said ... Also in an e-mail he may just disregard it....He may think it's just a thank you or a question about service.....

Answer 5

It's perfectly fine to ask a guy out via email! =) While it's not as traditional as a face-to-face or telephone invitation, this IS the digital age. I've been flirted with and asked out via email and IM before, and it wasn't any less flattering for me than a letter, telephone call, or face-to-face invitation. As long as you've met and spoken with him personally (an email invitation like that from someone I'd never met in person might trip me out a bit), I don't think he'll be put off by an email invitation at all.

In fact, as an IT professional, he might even get a kick out of an email date invitiation. ;-)

Answer 6

I think you need to do it in person. Unless your under 14, then i think it is ok to email. you sound mature so I am guessing your not that young. Be Brave! What is the worst that can happen? He says to you that he is really not interested? You will get over it and you can pat yourself on the back for ebing a brave, confident female@!

Answer 7

Way better in person, the guy, being IT probably gets tons of emails most of them about problems he has to fix, call his cell after work hours, and ask him that way.

Answer 8

Before E/mailing make sure that your computer can not be accessed from work while your not there or it might give you issues>>Yes why not ask him out or over for dinner since he has already been there> Have fun be safe>>>

Answer 9

You have his cell phone number. Give him a call. Maybe you will get lucky and he won't answer and you can leave a message. Then it will be the best of both worlds.

Answer 10

DO NOT ask him out over email. Too weird. Maybe text him and say whats up, and see how he responds. If its not a good response or no response than don't go on with it.
Its a weird situation because you work together.