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I have been dating this girl for a while, and she seems pretty interesting. I heard through folks who know her well that she has a commitment problem and judgment issues. She fell out with her parents and stoped going to school and went out with somebody her parents hated. She then broke up with that guy and again to prove a point on some issue went out with a another guy and that didnt work out as well. Now I got hooked up with her. We are seeing each other for a while though I dont know much about her, I am kind of interested. I want to give her a second chance in life to get back on track. But I am worried if this is being very naieve on my part ? Please advise.

2007-11-07 03:17:31 · 11 answers · asked by The Orion 1 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

11 answers

first of all, if you have issues with trust with her, like it sounds like, that is no good. too much doubt. if you can believe that she might change or that was only behavior she exhibited in the past, then maybe it will be ok. you have to trust her so you don't doubt her intentions with you, otherwise, in my opinion, the relationship isn't worth it. i don't blame you for having those ideas creep in your head. just make sure they are controllable so you are able to be happy without worrying.

2007-11-07 03:26:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

From what you described, it seems she has some personal issues yet to resolve. Why is she being defiant towards family and friends?
Put it this way, if you have doubts, you have them for a reason. Take it from someone who's been down an unhealthy relationship path - those gut feelings always deserve time.
You seem like a caring person and have a desire to help this young lady. That's very nice of you, but does she want help? If she doesn't want to get her life back on track, it could mean heartbreak for you. Be careful.

2007-11-07 03:22:19 · answer #2 · answered by namaste 2 · 0 0

HI,
You know somebody who has a history of failed relationship like has a tendency to continue the train where she stops it.

But like you rightly said giving her a second chance makes a lot of sense but you have to be careful take time out to under study her and also watch out on her behaviour.

Women can pretain a lot so do your own research you might love her and she is far a way from loving you.

But do it as a man she might appreciate you for you.

Thanks

2007-11-07 03:31:30 · answer #3 · answered by daniel65ng 3 · 0 0

You are getting info from people who know her, but have you asked HER what happened?
Using the words "marriage" and "kind of interested" in the same paragraph means you aren't ready for the first and need to decide if you want to continue getting to know her for the second!
Only you know what potential you see in this young lady. Give it some time and see how she handles herself and how you feel about her. There is no rush, just listen to your instincts and go on from there.

2007-11-07 05:50:30 · answer #4 · answered by dizzkat 7 · 0 0

first of all, don't do her any favors by giving her a second chance. either you like her and want to get to know her or you dont. you can only trust what a person says or does. if she is right for you then her actions and words will display that. dont look too far into the future, just try to take your time and get to know who she really is. everyone's real self comes through eventually, sometimes it takes longer for others. its ok to take your time, you dont want to rush into anything and get hurt or hurt her.

2007-11-07 03:29:43 · answer #5 · answered by Sweet Thang 2 · 0 0

When it comes to someones past you have to throw all of what you've heard out the window. You either trust her or you don't. You can feel it when you do trust her and, believe me, you can feel it when you don't too. It's as simple as that. I dated a guy for 6 months, who personally told me himself that he had cheated on a few girlfriends in the past. It irked me a little but never ever in the entire time of our relationship did I judge him for that b/c I never FELT a distrust for him. Likewise, I should hope that any commitment problems I'VE had in the past will not stop the future man of my dreams from marrying me. People grow and learn...shut out her past as a closed book unless you FEEL otherwise. That feeling of trust is an almighty one, follow it.

2007-11-07 03:28:20 · answer #6 · answered by Alaina's Mumma! 3 · 1 0

Well if she seriously wants to improve, you should give her a chance, but if its start to like she`s unfaithful you may be out of luck. As long as she makes en effort to go to school/get her life back on track should be fine

2007-11-07 03:21:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

You didn't mention her age, but sounds like she's relatively young. People grow and mature over time so if you really like her then hang in there a while. If you don't feel there's good potential at some point, then move on.

2007-11-07 03:22:41 · answer #8 · answered by . 7 · 0 0

i do no longer think of she's unavoidably making plans on cheating on the 2nd. by using fact of your anger/rage themes that's fullyyt accessible that she is afraid to assist you to realize approximately this dinner even although she has honorable intentions. That suggested, in case you enable this count drop she would finally end up cheating, regardless of if or no longer it somewhat is her objective ideal now. She would locate herself having a sturdy time on the date, feeling nearer and nearer to him, and then ultimately desirous to be with him as a substitute of you. aside out of your concern approximately her, you besides mght would desire to evaluate your rage themes. i do no longer think of that's worth getting her far flung from him if it skill which you have a blow-up and opposite your progression! She would divorce you basically for that...and take your babies, too! Is there some way or place which you would be waiting to be assured of being waiting to handle this to her gently? could that's extra ordinary in case you hit the gym first? Or spoke together with her on the telephone? Or took some medicine prescribed with the aid of your wellbeing practitioner? Or asked a kinfolk member to "ask your self" meet her on the eating place to a minimum of ward off something irrelevant from taking place day after today night? and so on. think of effective! think of wisely! evaluate your ideas by using fact i'm specific there are various! do no longer enable your rage administration you. additionally, I do think of your marriage is probable decrease than large stress if she does not record herself as "married" decrease than dating status on facebook and he or she did no longer point out you to this guy. have you ever been working on your marriage? have you ever apologized for previous rage themes? Do you purchase her flora and make her experience specific? Do you're taking it slow to do little issues for her on a common foundation? possibly this frightening journey can develop into some thing sturdy- a take-heed call to shop your marriage till now that's too previous due. sturdy success!

2016-10-15 08:51:40 · answer #9 · answered by kosmoski 4 · 0 0

Are you thinking about marriage already? Take your time with her. The fact that one of her friends have told you that she has issues should be a sign already.

2007-11-07 03:29:10 · answer #10 · answered by JustMe 3 · 0 0

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