Worried - about everything....?

Question

I've got a new job starting in December and am worried that they will ask me to do stuff i can't do, even though they liked me in the interview and i was honest and open about my skills. I'm worried about my dog because she is going through an adolescent stage but it coincides with my boyfriend not being able to spend as much time with her, taking him out to work with him, like he normally does, for a few weeks because he's working away, so she's spending more time on her own than usual, which i worry about - she's digging and chewing more. I worry about never having children, I'm nearly 37 and it just hasn't happened. I worry about getting old and not having any money to look after myself in my old age, I worry about wasting my life in this rat race and having to go somewhere every day and wasting my time doing something i have to do, to get money, not what i want to do. Life is so short I want it to be fun, I want to be able to spend my time doing what I want to do.

Can't go to bed - I've just got to work, I'm in the UK!!

Answer 1

ok worry produces worry lol its that simple. Lets break this down for you ok and deal with one problem at a time, trying to deal with it all at once will lead you to a nervous breakdown.
Ok Do not be worried about your job, if you were as you say honest and open in youre interview then they know what you are capable of and picked the right person for the job. If they ask you take on things you are not sure how to do then ask, they may be asking you as they see potential in you to progress further within their company. Not looked at it like that huh? So look for a positive in everything is what I am saying.
Ok youre dog, the dog is chewing and digging more because it has too much pent up energy inside it. Dogs need stimulation and exersize to be happy and stable, most dog problems can be solved on the whole with just exersize. So for this time of adjustment and the boyfriend been away employ a teenage kid to come in and walk your dog twice a day, that way it has company and exersize and you and the dog are happy. Dont feel guilty about the dog, dogs live in the moment, they wont punsih you for this.
ok having children, that I am afraid is down to mother nature and not something I can help you with other than stress and anxiety and worry are all contributing factors for trouble with conception. Also here are some links you may find helpful or imformative.
http://www.marilynglenville.com/infertility.htm
http://www.whatreallyworks.co.uk/start/factsheets.asp?article_ID=477
The only other advice I can give you for this is try not to focus to much on the end result, the less you focus on the end result the quicker it will come,with one eye fixed on the destination there is only one eye left to guide you along your journey.
Finally as far as money................. there is a huge difference between well being, and being well off!!!
You are in control of your life, the only limitations you have are the ones you place upon yourself.
You control your mind or it controls you,I say many times on here that fear is nothing more than a mental monster we create in our minds, we are not born with it, and the only way to predict youre future is to create it.

Answer 2

I understand - sometimes when things pile up life can become quite stressful!
By writing everything down that is a problem in your life, is the beginning of making things better - you just need to make some descisions-
Your new job? How exciting!! - Grab it with both hands and do your best!!!
Your dog? I have 2 - they tend to keep each other company when I don't always have the time - would you consider getting another one??
Children? 37 is still young - go and have a check up, and if things aren't quite right - there is always IVF.
Opportunities are everywhere - write down all of the things you love to do, things you find fun and exciting, then do a little research and go and do them - I agree life is too short - You should spoil yourself every now and then, even if it's something small - recognise it as a well deserved treat!!

Answer 3

I feel for you; I worry too, all the time! I'm learning that the best thing I can do for myself is just that: DO FOR MYSELF.

Go to the gym. Or start running. Or start walking. Or try Yoga. Hey!! Walk your dog as often as you can: it's a great bonding experience and it'll help with your worrying twice over.

Get a financial plan in order. Go to the bank and just say, "I'm worried about getting old and not having any money . . . " Taking care of these worries is their job.

Congratulations on your new job! You obviously managed to show in your interview that you're bright and conscientious. Ask questions, listen to the answers, and do what you do! They'll be reminded why they chose you in the first place.

When I take care of myself, the rest of life seems to follow. I hope this helps.

Answer 4

worrying does nothing but make your symptoms (if you have anxiety) worse.you get to be that way on a daily basis,and it becomes second nature.as for getting old? its a fact of life.i dont wanna get old either,trust me,i dont think anyone does.and money....lol lets not go there. i got the same problem,i live from month to month and seems that anytime i get an over abundance of money, i wind up pi**ing it away on a truck repair or something that comes up unexpectedly.it comes and goes faster than i can save it.my advice?look at it this way,you might not die rich,and you might even live past the average life expectancy in the US,but just think,if you live another 40+ years?all those days you spent worrying.you couldve been having a good time or just relaxing.i'm in that mode now,looking back at the last 17 years, i'm been miserable and cranky and worrying big time ,and i think...all that time that went by,it was a waste.so now,i'm 49 and i'm trying to look at things differently-my health isnt the best and ,sure.i know someday i'm gonna be old and die.i make the best of things that i know how now.i dont want another year to slip by and have nothing to remember except feeling the same way everyday. you gotta break the chain somehow but it all is up to you and how you want to feel////i think it was abe lincoln that said "most people make up their minds to be happy" good luck and hope i could help

Answer 5

It's all about perspective. You worry about certain things that affect you or may affect you. Dogs live in the moment. If you change their routine they can get separation anxiety and chew stuff up, but much of that is overplayed in my opinion and usually centres around them being bored. So it could be said that having a bored dog for a few weeks isn't so much of a thing to worry about.

Everyone worries about starting a new job - that's not unusual at all. Almost as soon as you start work there you'll get your personal routine going and everything will be fine.

My mother gave birth to me when she was 38 and that was in 1966. Her worrying about having a baby prevented her from conceiving so my parents adopted my oldest brother. Once the worry was gone she had my older brother then me.

As for wasting your life - well you know what to do about that more than I could ever tell you. Everyone - absolutely everyone wants to spend their time doing what they want to do - but most of us have to work to live. Maybe the trick is to want what you have rather than have what you want.

Answer 6

I'm not sure i understand ur feeling but I'll try my best to answer ur worriers....
JOB- U already pass the INTERVIEW well done they like U and they offer U the job so nothing to worry about just used your skill out loud and trust me if U shows ur hardworking attitude they will love it OKEY!!

PET- yes I understand ur feeling why don't U find someone who can be trusted to spend time to take her walk or play with her. Try find Ur neighbour children as they really love it plus if u give some money for incentive....

Child- there are a lot of way now days to help U with this problem all U need is support from UR boyfriend and go check Ur ovary status for pregnancy. If can't why don't U try to Adopt child. Giving life to unfortunate child may bring all the happiness that u've been seeking in ur life.

You know that life is short so what are you waiting for?? Start pursue all your dream and need and throw away all your worriers into dustbin.

Only you yourself can stopping you from all your dream. so stop worried and start working to reveal your needs..;-))

Answer 7

unfortunately it's tough juggling stuff. you just have to make the best out of everything. i'm sure everything will work out when it comes to having kids. and for your dog, my dog did the same. our whole patio was chewed up...haha. maybe it's the area you are living in? i understand you can't just move and start over because you just started your new job, but that's just the way things go. as far as your performance at work...don't worry, you'll do just fine. i'm sure someone will be there to help you out a little. you got the job...you can get the job done. this is probably an answer that isn't going to help you much, but all i can say is just try to make the best out of everything. you can do it

Answer 8

the answer is PRAY. God will help you, but you must meet him half way. I know what you mena about all this, i too have the same issues right now. i find that once i put all my worries on God's shoulder it helped. As for not having children, i too fear that. I've always wanted children, but at 18 was told i was infertile. i was crushed but never gave up always prayed. then 2 years later i was told i was misdiagnosed and did have polycyctic ovarian sydrome. which means i can still have kids but very very very slim chance. but i'm still not giving up. i had myself and my husband checked out from a fertility specalist and he told me i had 12 more years to have a child.. but it will be hard for me cuz of my condition...as for my husband he also has a gentic disorder and have a very low sperm account. and some of the sperm's tails r deformed causing what chance we have to be even slimer. but i won't give up. i'll keep praying. I know God will give me children, why else would he give me so much love and want for children, if not? We ( my husband and I) have looke dinto adoption. I'm willing to adopt but i also want a biologial child. I say keep on praying.. God will grant you one. I have the same problem as you it aseems.. too much worry and stress... this my friend lowers the chance of us every getting pregnant. try to find a hobby or work at a daycare center or babysit and try to get calm. try to live for other's children first then when you least expect it.. you'll have one of your own. i hope you do. your dog is feeling lonely and he can feel the stress radating off of you. i have 2 kitties and they know when i am the same way. but pray and try to set your mind on a different samll goals. such as redeorating a room u always wanted to but didnt have the time...then after that set another after you finish these small goals you start to feel good about it..even if it was something you consider "dumb" but these small joys will start to take away the stress. i'm working on this..hopeing God will bless me with a child soon :) and i hope God blesses you with a child soon too! just remember my friend, Pray! put it in God's hands :)

Answer 9

hi there i know how you feel, i'm a worrier too! it's just part of our genetic make-up and what makes us who we are. i know you probably feel stupid sometimes worrying about the kind of things that other people don't even seem to notice or bother about, but this is not a bad thing - it means that you are a good, kind, thoughtful and considerate person. without people like you, the world wouldn't be a very nice place to be.
you CAN do well at your new job or they wouldn't of employed you, you just haven't got the faith in yourself to have that confidence just yet. when you start your job ensure that you seek praise for jobs that you do well - this will boost your self esteem no end, and in the mean time - ensure that you allow plenty of "you-time" for relaxing in whatever way makes you feel happy. i know it seems like a cliche, but exercising really does work - just make sure it is fun exercise, like walking the dog!!
i'm not expecting that this will have instant results, but read it daily until it begins to sink in- then one day you will wake up, and it'll make more sense.
good luck and take care x

Answer 10

life is what you make it and if you spend all your time owrrying about what ifs and what mights bes then you wont be living the now. i have learnt over the last few years to just enjoy the NOW - try not to focus to hard on what could be. its a fact that we need to work to pay for things that enable us to have some quality of life and of course not everyone is fortunate enough to have a job they love or find fun. i always have seen working as just a means to an end - that end being coming home to my partner and enjoying a nice meal, bottle of wine and a dvd! i find its the little things which bring the most pleasure. tackle each situation one by one:
- job - if they ask you to do something your not sure about, just ASK.
- dog - i guess try and spend as much quality time as poss with her and maybe provide things she can chew at rather than furniture etc.
- children - your not too old, these days women are having kids well into their 40s. have you discussed with your partner?

good luck xx