Confused...torn. what do i do?

Question

I hate thinking about this because it gets me so confused... ughh

so i went to this halloween party last weekend, kind of last minute. i couldnt get a hold of my boyfriend beforehand so i just went with some friends. i got way drunk and ended up giving it up to some guy who i'd met like once before who goes to the all-boy school in my area. i never mentioned that i went to my boyfriend, and i guess no one mentioned to him that i was there

my boyfriend and i were both virgins. we made a point of saving ourselves for marriage because of how great a gift it would be. now i dont have a gift to give him :/

the thing is that we've always told each other everything, and i feel like i need to tell him whats happened but how can we ever patch something like this up?

i feel horrible. i dont know what to do

Answer 1

If you want to keep a happy relationship with your boyfriend, keep quiet about this. No one wants to hear about "unfaithfulness".
It is not a big deal to lose one's virginity. It is blown up to be more than it is by religious types.
It is a big deal to sleep with a new guy while you are committed to another one.
Even if your bf "forgives" you, the thought of it will taint your relationship for as long as it lasts.
By the way, hope you used protection. Otherwise, you may be writing here about what to do about your unwanted pregnancy in a few weeks.

Answer 2

Being drunk is not an excuse, sorry. You allowed yourself to be irresponsible so you should confess what you did. It's not right to keep this from him esp. if you two were saving it and all. You messed up and you're basically at his mercy of whether or not you two will be together still or not once you tell him. If you can live with the guilt then you don't need to tell him - but as you said you tell each other everything - and I'm sure you'll feel really bad when it's your first time doing it with him. So might as well tell him now before then. Good luck with that. How to patch it up - show him you'll never do it again and continue to do everything you can to gain his forgiveness. Show how sorry you are for having done such a thing. And I highly recommend to not say "at least I told you about it" if you were thinking of saying that while you two are arguing. Personally that's just irritating as it's not something someone should hide in the first place if you understand what I mean.

Answer 3

I'm sorry honey, But you should and problem need to tell him... i don't know ether of you but I do know it is guna hit him like nothing every has before because he most like never thought outta all people you could ever hurt him...
I don't what really to let you know what to do, or what to say, But I can tell you TIME is the only good thing that's guna help both of you... It only how you both choices to spend that time to make it work in your favor...
Another great point is the less people you both get involved is better, Yes a few is fine But too many thoughts can always change the route you were headed in...
I hope you understand what I'm trying to say...
Good Luck...

Answer 4

Ok. You have obviously been in this relationship for a long time if you are thinking and talking about marriage... I honestly believe that you should talk to him about it. Tell him and be honest. I know that it is going to hurt both of you at the end of the day. But what is more important? Living a lie, or being in love and truthful? I honestly believe that being honest is where you need to go with this. If he truly loves you and you truly love him then it will work. If it doesnt then you know that it wasnt meant to be. Fate works in funny ways.

Answer 5

Well first things first if you tell him here what he'll feel. He will feel hurt, maybe betrayed if "He" is that kind of guy that keeps promises which you did broke. Telling him will hurt him so much your relationship may end up like that, but on other hand he might take it if he loves you so much. try talking to him and beg for forgiveness. so much for the hurting but you'll not live in confusion and guilt the moment you talked to him.

You should be honest but be smart on a guy that you know. Goodluck. Well you can always hide it.

Answer 6

He'll figure you out anyways when you go to have sex for the first time, if you ever get married. Tell him now or he'll find out later. He'll probably dump you either way. I would. If a girl made me wait so long and then gives it up to some random guy at a party. Maybe it'll hurt less if you do it now.

Answer 7

you need to tell him because he has saved his self for you and here you cheated on him. he can do better. i wish i knew him because hun if you didnt tell him in all honesty i would. because that is so not right to cheat on some one you say you love. and like try and hide it. eaither way he will find out sooner or later just letting you know. that guy may tell or maybe your friends may who knows but it is always better to hear it from the one who did it than someone else

Answer 8

Karma"

what goes around comes around.."

Fact of my life-

My ex cheated on me.We we're together 5yrs he never told me about the affair until,he knocked up the girl.I have a kid from my ex..It broke me into half..I loved him till death but later I learn to hate and forgive..We are not together any more.I have been single 1yr. His girl cheated on him with his cousin..Like I said"karma" And he loved her..Like I loved him.

Even if you don't tell him..Someday he will find out or you will get what you deserve..

In the world you live and learn and from you mistakes you own them.

Answer 9

holy crap.. well i guess i don't know what to do.. first thing would be to not have sex with anyone else for a little while, and try to live your lie.. if he loves you enough and you tell him he should forgive you.. why would you do such a thing.. You shouldn't even deserve the guy you're with.. not trying to be harsh, but thats just messed up..

Answer 10

Don't worry. Send him off to party with one of your friends and let him ram her for little while. Or perhaps she could just lick to the center of his lollypop. Either way, you'll both feel better.