Spanking???

Question

Why are parents so against spanking nowadays?
Do "time outs" and 1-2-3 really work?
Honestly if you give your child a lil smack on the butt they will know you mean business..

I see kids who hit their parents and tell them what to do, throw fits in the store because they don't get what they want and talk back..
what's with not spanking? what's so wrong about it?

Answer 1

Im not against it....I will spank with the best of them!!! Its better then the belt or the ping pong paddle like I got!!

Answer 2

Spanking has fallen out of favor in some segments of our society because some people use it as an excuse to abuse their children. That is wrong and I have no sympathy for a child abuser.

However, what many of the experts can't seem to figure out is that a mild to moderate spanking given solely on a child's butt is not child abuse.

Parents choosing to spank should follow certain guidelines. 1. Never spank while you are angry; 2. Never use anything, but your hand to spank; 3. Never spank on the bare skin--although, I think spanking over a pair of underpants is fine.

We sometimes hear "horror stories" about CPS investigating parents for giving a mild spanking. I'm not sure we hear the whole story in those reports. However, the authorities should leave parents alone who are simply giving mild spankings to their kids for discipline. Its no one else's business.

Answer 3

I think its just a personal choice. I am not for or against a little spanking here and there. I have not had the need to spank my daughter, but its not to say one day I won't. I say, let the parent decide how to raise their child. As long as the child is not being abused, it shouldn't really matter how anyone raises their kid. They are the ones that have to put up with the kids behavior 24/7.

Answer 4

I do not believe in spanking because to my knowledge a majority of parents do not just do a "lil smack on the butt"... I work in a store and see countless parents every day pretty much pick their kids up by one arm, dangling them in the air and smack their butt so hard you can HEAR the impact.

and CHILDREN do not know how to use their words when they are ANGRY like so-called adults do, or are supposed to know how anyways... and the reason children hit is because they see other people doing it, the same with talking back.

If you never say curse words in front of your kid, do you think they're going to use curse words? Not until they go to school and learn it from some other stupid little kid whose parents made them think it was ok. The same with hitting, talking back, screaming, etc.

Spanking is just another way of showing children that violence solves problems. And it doesn't. It never has. It never will.

Not to mention the poor kid will probably be scared sh!tless of you afterwards. I don't know about you, but I would rather my children love me because I am understanding and caring than have them say things like "you better not or we'll get a whuppin" like I hear SO MANY times every day...

Answer 5

There is nothing wrong with spanking as long as the parents know where their boundaries are. I was spanked, my kids were spanked and (I will hate to do it but) my grandkids will be spanked. I raised very respectful, law abiding, kids with very big hearts. When my kids bit or hit, they were bit and hit back by me. Very lightly, but enough to make them understand that that hurts and they shouldn't do that to someone else if they don't want it done to them. I love my kids more than anything in this world. And I did not want my kids to be the ones that people dreaded to see pull in the drive-way.
My ex (thank God) sister n law was one of those that do the time outs and they DO NOT WORK. I guarantee that her kids will end up in jail. They are monsters. And she is one of those that say "I don't spank my kids and they are angels" Yeah right!!!!!!!!And that is one reason that I am glad that I am divorced, because they won't be pulling in my drive-way anymore. yayyyyyyyyyyy

Answer 6

Because they have come to realize that spanking is evil, primitive, barbaric, inhumane, and out-dated, that it is a terrible form of violence that teaches children to be violent, and that spanking is a form of sexual assault. At least some parents have. But unfortunately, many parents still beat (oh, sorry, i mean "spank") their children. They are evil, violent parents who are living in the dark ages and are too stupid and lazy to raise children without beating them into submission. Parents who spank are either pedophiles who get sexual pleasure from beating children on the buttocks (which are a private and sexual region), or they are sadistic bullies who enjoy beating someone who is smaller and weaker than them, because it makes them feel powerful. That is why spanking is wrong. Spanking is evil and should be illegal in every country. There is no reason why children shouldn't have a right to protection from assault, battery, and sexual molestation. After all, children are people, too, not just an underclass of subhuman slaves that you can beat any time you're frustrated with something like parents who spank seem to think.

Answer 7

Why spank if you don't need to, though? Especially since spanking itself doesn't really teach a child much more than "do what I say because if you don't I will hurt you". It doesn't teach a child why your way of doing things is best. It doesn't teach a child how to make good decisions in the absence of potential pain.

So, why do it?

To get the child's attention? How about talking to them, down on their eye level?

To keep them safe? Why are you putting them, unsupervised, into situations where they don't understand how & why to behave in a safe manner, anyway?

To let them know you mean business? What does that even mean? Don't they respect your intelligence & trust your guidance enough to listen to you otherwise? Maybe you should work on that, instead.

Personally, what I've found to work best to really teach my kids how to make good choices in their lives, whether we're there or not, was neither spanking (well, we never tried that, actually), timeouts or 1-2-3 magic. It's natural consequences and guidance that they trust due to a good attachment bond we created with them when they were really little.

Why spank? What does it teach?

Answer 8

Why would ANY parent expect their young child to have a thought process obviously more mature than their parents? You cannot reason with a toddler. That is neglect right there given the fact that children are not play toys and they have the right to learn to grow forward. Just because public schools, media, gossip, and other situations has brainwashed you all into thinking you were all abused doesn't it make it real. It also makes those who have truly been abused disgusted.

Abusers are abusers and they, like it not, were abusive way before they came into the spouses life and later their children's...true abuse is not a questionable action. Being engaged to an abuser is like living on a roller coaster ride yet on the straight and narrow until the papers are signed. Are all people abusive - no way. But I've met a host of individuals that never got spankings, or dealt with as children and yet abuse their spouses and children while their other spouse takes the rap...I've had one lay their hands on me right in the courtroom lobby with charges on him already. Notice I'm not using gender here either because real abuse is not gender specific. My grandson's mother punched my adult son in the head so hard she knocked him off the chair and told him to go kill himself. This happened in front of my grandson. We saw that she puts the furniture outside once a week at least & tells him to move out every other month but then tells him to come back. Meanwhile, my grandson will not sit civily in a high chair like a human being in a restaraunt and he's being aloud to wreck the home. Does this make me nosey? No, I'm actually pretty disgusted and think my son should get his son out of that house. All her relatives do is say ...oh, she's been like that all her life. Ah, huh as she explains to me her parents are Christians who never yelled and bragged about not being parented.

Abusers do not parent and if they do hit their child it ends a hospital trip - that is what abuse means. So, for those younger parents who have insisted he said she said is all that start banking your money because junvenile quarters or foster/therapy/endless parenting classes etc is the name of game. One huge thing they think you are too young and dumb to figure it out. That will be after your son or daughter beats the daylights out of you and possibly will also be told it's ok by a vindictive person or more- then they will blame you for your child's behavior. What would you expect...so many years of ruling the roost OR doing what ever they please...or their other parent allowed childishly. In fact, they have no quams about placing children with abusers ...doesn't matter their record, past, or present behavior. So, for all of you that are into "save the child" you are doing the opposite to be part of a crowd that will have zero problems using your child in the future.

Yes, controlled spankings means a child has done something very wrong. I do not believe a child should be spanked all day long for everything. Time outs work if a child does not destroy everything around them while sitting in a chair or what ever. If that is going on your child is already very out of control of themselves via anti-parenting.

Answer 9

As a last resort OK. It is my form of riddalin. Think back to when spanking became taboo. Wasn't it about the time that all these psychiatrists started spewing psycho babble about children having choices? Just look at these kids today. There has never been more cases of autism and ADHD. People would like to blame it on environment, immunizations, etc... Parents just need to get back to basics and do their jobs of sending functional adults into the world. Not adults that need to see their therapist once a week to be coddled and given a line of BS and a prescription. What the hell are children to learn from that? I was spanked as a child, and I don't resent my parents or fear them. Quite the opposite. I am super grateful that they raised me to be ambitious and have values! Did I particularly like them growing up? Not really. But it wasn't their job to be my friend. People ALWAYS comment on how respectful and well behaved my 2 children are. My daughter won the principals respect and character award. Teachers are amazed that she is "so good"
I think it is plain rediculous that something like that is such a surprise. When I was a child it was EXPECTED. Do my children liked getting spanked? NO. Do I like doing it? NO! At the end of the day, the most important thing is that my children know that they are loved. They have expectations on them, as well as limits. Something all children need. Again this is used as a last resort. Our grandparents have done very well. (They were spanked) Our parents have done well. (They were spanked) We have done well. (most of us were spanked) This generation is drugged up and running their parents lives!

Answer 10

I think spanking is ok. It's just how you do it and when you do. Time-out dont always work neither does 1-2-3 so if your child is bad he needs a spanking jsut do it in the privacy of your home and not in front of your little one friends or relatives because then now that mentally damaging your kid in the near future. Spanking is not always ok

Answer 11

There is nothing wrong with spanking. There is something wrong with parents who take it too far. There are rules to this thing, #1 no spanking when you are angry. #2 always talk to your child and tell them why they are getting a spanking. #3 Always tell them you are doing it because you love them. We all don't want are children growing up to be serial killers and such ,cause we let them them do what ever the hell they wanted. I also hate to see the parents in the stores or on the trains etc.. getting punked by 2,3,4,5 etc.. year olds it a travesty.