My fiance has invited the parents of his first love... whom he dated years ago and was engaged to. He says he's been close friends with her father ever since. It wouldn't bother me so much, but my parents can't even come to the wedding! They live in a foreign country and the only contact they'd had with my fiance has been a few phone calls and some text messages.
I'm afraid when I see his ex's parents I'll break out in tears because I don't see mine there. Am I being a jealous baby?
2007-11-06 07:24:41 · 15 answers · asked by Avelyn 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Just because your parents can't make it does not mean you should have an issue with his ex's parents.
He's close to the father, so why wouldn't he invite them?
Don't be upset. I'm sure you are sad that your folks cannot make it.
Have you tried to see if you can help them make it if its a financial reason?
2007-11-07 04:42:15 · answer #1 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are being jealous but there's no harm in being jealous that people can come to your wedding when your parents are unable to. He's inviting their parents because they are now friends of his, not because they are his first loves parents. Try to set aside a time during your wedding, after the ceremony preferably when you and your new husband can go somewhere and call your parents. So they can be the first to say congratulations.
2007-11-06 16:34:00 · answer #2 · answered by Manny 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow that's a tough situation. I think it would be different if he hadn't been engaged to this girl, and yes, I know it's her parents...but if it were me...I would see my ex's parents and think of my ex - despite it being MY wedding day.
Of course there is a bit of jealousy there...and I don't think that's anything to be ashamed of. In fact, I think it's healthy! It shows that you care. And on the day of my wedding I don't want my fiance thinking about anything else than his future with me!
I'm advising you to draw the line, and tell him that you're not comfortable with his ex's parent's being there. I'm sure he and the ex's parents will understand your rationale.
2007-11-06 15:42:05 · answer #3 · answered by lilfrisco 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
no...i would not want them there if it was a more personal reason such as your parents not being able to attend. i think you need to explain that to him...and hope that he'll be understanding enough to see things your way.
good luck!
*UPDATED*
Just wanted to clarify that my no was in response to your question if you were being a baby! No I dont think you are...but yes, I do think its ok to be upset by them being at your wedding! I dont think anyone's ex belong at a wedding for the new party involved! I unfortunately had to attend a wedding with my boyfriend and his parents and sister for his daughters mother. I guess it was a nice gesture to keep peace and invite us all...but we didn't have to attend. We sat at a table in the corner of the room and were ignored the whole time!
2007-11-06 15:29:25 · answer #4 · answered by Sunshine 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Well, I think it's weird that he's invited his ex's parents. Friends or not, she's sure to come up in discussion, and why would you want your brand new hubby talking about his ex on your wedding day!?
I don't think you're being a baby at all, I don't think it's their place to attend your wedding, due to their history.
Explain your feelings to your man and I think he'll understand.
2007-11-06 15:37:32 · answer #5 · answered by chaychayolei 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
While it is unfortunate that your parents can not attend, you should not put a limit on who he wants to invite. Clearly, he has become friends with his ex's father. Has he told you that you can not invite your friends? Probably not, so why tell him who he can and can not invite? I would not want to start off a marriage telling the man you love that he can not invite friends of his. If it would be uncomfortable for anyone, it would be the ex's parents. Think about it. He picked YOU and not their daughter! You should welcome them with open arms for wanting to celebrate your day with you. Maybe you could find a way to bring your parents here. Afterall, you are getting married.
2007-11-06 15:39:02 · answer #6 · answered by PM 2 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Remember, the ex's father helped to make your fiance who he is today. Yes, you are being a jealous baby, but it very understandable. I wish you the best.
2007-11-06 15:36:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
I think your being jealous not because of who they are, but because your parents can't attend, and this is ok. Talk to your fiance, and tell him how you feel.
2007-11-06 15:37:06 · answer #8 · answered by kimandryan2008 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
yeah you are being unreasonable about it,its not his fault that your parents aren't coming to the wedding,and there is nothing wrong that he has a nice relationship with his ex parents, that means he is a nice guy and they learn to love him,i would be thankful is not his ex in your place at the wedding instead of be concern about that.
your parents will be with you in your heart even is they aren't there in person,so don't get sad in a day u will bond to the man u love,focus in what u will have not in what u wont.
2007-11-06 15:32:27 · answer #9 · answered by nataly_23_h 2 · 2⤊ 3⤋
well it is sad that your parents cant be there but i dont think you should hold it against him to not have the people there that he cares about. my fiances family lives in brazil and wont be able to attend but he would never stop me from having the people i love there.
2007-11-06 15:30:52 · answer #10 · answered by always thinkin 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋