Hi
I dated a girl for about a month, broke up up with her, we stayed friends, she met someone else and I've slowly fallen in love with her. She's been seeing this guy for about 5 months and she still see's me as a friend (although I haven't contacted her in months).
Now I want her back and I'm going to confront her.
I need advice from females - please.
Thanks
2007-11-06 06:02:34 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I understand it appears unfair but I she is worth fighting for. If it risks the friendship then so be it. I cannot fight what I feel and I would be a liar if I said nothing.
Pride? What is pride in the face of such overwhelmimg emotions?
2007-11-06 06:24:21 · update #1
just tell her how you feel. and dont do it in a creepy way. like showing up at her doorstep unannounced. do it in a romantic way but make it known that your ok if she still wants to be friends.
2007-11-06 06:07:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Why did you break up in the first place? You also have to ask yourself if you really have fallen in love with her all over again or if it's because she's with someone else and now it's a challenge? If you haven't contacted her in months how close are you, really?
You should let it go. It's not fair to her after she's moved on.
I think the saying is true: "If you love something let it go. If it comes back to you - it was yours. If it doesn't, it never was." It's harder said than done - trust me, but it's true. Everything happens for a reason. Good luck. I'm sure it's not the answer you were looking for, but it's called RESPECT. Respecting her...and yourself.
2007-11-06 06:10:41 · answer #2 · answered by FF'n Momma 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you want her back because you know she is not available?
or do you think she feels the same way about you, as you do her. Ask her how she felt about your break up?
These are some of the things you need to examine before you let her know how you feel, bearing in mind you may scare her off. Respect her feelings for this other guy and their relationship, if you care for her you will allow her to make up her mind without any prompting from you. Keep your pride at the same time.. get out and enjoy meeting new people in the meantime.
2007-11-06 06:13:24 · answer #3 · answered by BettyBoop 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
two things:(oops three)
actually it would be wrong and stupid to NOT fight what you feel. Feelings are fleeting, and should never be relied upon as an absolute determination for or against a relationship. If EVERYONE did not fight their feelings there would be ALOT more crime.
Know thyself first - If you started loving her after the breakup, you may be wired this way, be careful, it may only be you wanting what you seemingly cannot have and therefore NOT really a love for her for real, after all YOU CAN'T KNOW LOVE IN A MONTH.
Second - Become this guys best friend and let us know if it breaks them up, and let us know if it works for guys like it works for girls who do the same in reverse - OR date HER best friend.
2007-11-06 13:15:40 · answer #4 · answered by isaiah5336 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, why did you break up with her? You need to re-evaluate that before you confront her. The age old saying comes to mind (you never know what you had until it's gone). You also need to ask yourself if it is a control issue on your part. Do you want her back because you feel that you should have her and no one else? Please think things through before you act. You might be surprised. Good luck.
2007-11-06 06:13:34 · answer #5 · answered by gemone523 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you confront her about it, it might actually make things worse. I've been there... I know what you are going through...but the best thing is to wait to see if they break up (which is NOT recommended) or move on... it will be very heard either way but you have to put yourself first in the situation...
if you tell her it might wierd her out and she wont talk to you anymore because of it...
I hope everything works out for you! Really...
2007-11-06 06:07:42 · answer #6 · answered by Kelsey S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, here's a crazy idea... maybe she is happy with the guy she met after you dumped her. Maybe she wants to continue being happy with the life she's made since you two parted ways. She's been seeing him for a much longer time than you two were together.
Honestly, my best advice, if you care about her as much as you say you do, is to leave her alone. If you don't, it comes across as you worrying about your whims rather than her feelings, and that's not very thoughtful.
2007-11-06 06:07:47 · answer #7 · answered by Flock of Seagulls Haircut 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all respect that she has a bf, how would you feel if someone tried to take your gf away? BUT...there is still hope! : First; cherish her, a girl always likes to be cherished. second; make her feel special - eg. self-made xmas card. Third; Become an interesting person yourself - eg. start running and look really fit! lol. All the best, bigi& gigi.
2007-11-06 06:40:25 · answer #8 · answered by Bigi & Gigi the dog 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she sees you as a friend, then there is no winning her back...unless she has told you that she is terribly unhappy with this new guy, then you shouldn't try to get back in her life that way. You should always do what is best for you, unless it interferes with someone else's peace of mind.
2007-11-06 06:15:11 · answer #9 · answered by boomin h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave it!
You broke up with her in the first place- She moved on, let her be happy. You can't destroy her relationship now because you have realise you love her.
You said you were still friends? If she still had feelings for you, wouldn't she have told you?
I'd say leave her to be happy.
xxxx
2007-11-06 06:07:46 · answer #10 · answered by alexandrairvine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
call her & tell her you've fallen in love with her. who cares if she has a new man, you have the right to let her know even if she doesn't except the offer :) you shouldn't of stayed out of contact with her!
2007-11-06 06:12:07 · answer #11 · answered by chrissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋