I had a boyfriend &a male best friend. Male best friend had gf who I wasn't even friends with. My male best friend kept telling me he loved me&that we were soul mates. I always told him not to say it to me, as it was inappropriate. I broke up with my bf, my best friend's gf dumped him &2 months later me &my best friend slept together. My best friend told me he wanted to marry me etc. Then his ex gf found out, and went mental! My best friend told a lot of lies and basically ended up getting back with his ex, & she still doesn't know the whole truth. Thing is, his gf blamed ME! She said I manipulated him into sleeping with me, and into lying, and called me names even though SHE had broken up with HIM&I had always told him to shut up when he was inappropriate to me. PLUS my ex is still friends with my best friend (also his friend) but won't talk to me, even though I never cheated,&this other guy lied to him&he knows it! I didn't lie or cheat&get blamed.He did, but I end up losing out.Why?
2007-11-06 05:20:18 · 17 answers · asked by Katrina W 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I don't know the answer to this question. But it's easy to feel like a victim. If it's any consolation, there are times when I feel like I'm being manipulated too. There is this girl who has a BF and is totally sending me mixed signals. I don't know what to do about her. If I act interested, she immediately puts on a guard, mentions her BF and takes the example of other guys who are interested in her that she has turned down. Asks me about my dates. But when I start talking about other girls I've gone on dates with or if I just don't talk to her for awhile, she gets all upset that I didn't contact her. If she sees me dancing with other girls, she looks completely jealous/pissed off. She's always looking at parties to see who I'm talking to.
Ask yourself if you ever send your male best friend any mixed signals. If he saw a lot of mixed signals coming from you, maybe he just thought that all you wanted to do was have sex. Really think about this.
About your ex, you shouldn't really worry who he is friends with. Your relationship with him ended for a reason and so he shouldn't be affecting your thoughts anyway. You shouldn't even worry about your male best friend's ex-gf. You never had anything to do with this girl, so you shouldn't even care a hoot what she thinks about you. What you should worry about is YOU and your male best friend, because it seems like you still have feelings for this fella. Meet him alone and talk it over.
Good luck girl.
2007-11-06 05:28:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As my hubby told me a long time ago that I am the responsible one, anything that goes wrong, I am responsible for. Of course he was just joking, but that is usually the case.
If your best friend is telling lies on you to other people, it sounds like he is not that great of a friend. You need to ask him point blank whe did he lie about it. It isn't like you were cheating on anyone, either one of you.
I feel for you girl, I have been in the exact same situation. My friend and I still talk occassionally. It was strained for a while, but I am married now and so is he. So I guess we have just slowly moved on!
Good Luck!
2007-11-06 05:28:50 · answer #2 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does seem to be that way. People love to blame the woman for everything even though she is innocent. It isn't fair but happens a lot. I think you are better off without them. Your male best friend wasn't a friend at all. Be glad you found out now. He was a liar and manipulator so you are better off without him. I would find new friends and move on. They aren't worth your worrying about.
2007-11-06 05:29:29 · answer #3 · answered by Jodi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because in their eyes you cheated and done these things that they claim you did. BUT! if you didn't do what they said you did, then it all boils down to this. Every body thinks that a woman and a man cannot be just friends. But I know this isnt true. So my advice to you is do what Keyshia Cole says in her song "Let it go". Im sure you can do better anyway. besides if he got back with his ex then they were ment to be.
Good people always gets blamed for stuff that they didnt do.
Good luck~
2007-11-06 05:34:04 · answer #4 · answered by black_buttafly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get a group of more mature friends and you need to rethink you sexual partners. Be sure there is a good foundation for a long term relationship before you take your clothes off. Intercourse is not a kiss and should be taken more seriously. And casual sex can really cause you some problems, in mental anguish and health. You don't have to be celibate but at least use some discretion.
2007-11-06 05:27:59 · answer #5 · answered by Lyn B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why? Re-read what you wrote. There's no thread of logic here, just chaos. What do you expect? Your relationships sound like something out of a soap opera.
This has nothing to do with "the woman always being blamed for everything." This is one isolated case. Your former friend blames you because, she's jealous of the fact that you got together with her ex. Not that hard to figure that out. You're ex is probably pissed because you dumped him.
2007-11-06 05:24:48 · answer #6 · answered by Underground Man 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People don't always blame to woman for everything. The only reason you're being blamed in this situation is his current GF is always gonna take his side.
2007-11-06 05:26:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The woman isn't blamed any more than the man...most people prefer to point fingers rather than accept any kind of responsibility for things that don't go well.
2007-11-06 05:24:20 · answer #8 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
why does this even matter to you?
Focus on the future. Spend too much time looking in the rearview mirror and you'll plow into whatever is in front of you.
2007-11-06 05:26:50 · answer #9 · answered by centexdance 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Too much drama..sheesh
If he got back together with her, regardless of how you felt, AFTER he said he wanted to marry you, then just LEAVE him. He's a sick player and is just toying with your feelings.
2007-11-06 05:25:32 · answer #10 · answered by Nina is here! :D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋