My ex contacted me after a year of silence. I was stunned naturally but I stayed completeley aloof and agreed to meet him up for drinks this Friday. It was all his suggestion. Oddly, he began laying terms and conditions on me like "I'm not ready for a relationship and us meeting shouldn't suggest so." I hadn't implied anything in the first place. If anything, he went out of his way to track me down and ask me out!
Anyway, since hearing those words, I have ensured to stay aloof. He's been randomly texting me over the weekend but I haven't replied, out of not seeing a need to respond. By this I mean, he wasn't leaving me anything to respond to. For example "I'm not much of an eater. But I don't mind drinks." Okay.....as you can see, the texts sound more like statements rather than direct questions.
So he texts me today saying "you're not much of a texter are you?" What does he want me to say? Wouldn't you stay aloof towards someone who said that they weren't ready for a relationship? Besides, what is he getting paranoid about? He knows we're definetly on for this Friday. he can ask all the question he wants then.
Can anyone shed light on this situation, as in why are the signals mixed?
2007-11-05 22:09:15 · 25 answers · asked by tasharni 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
avoid him if he is not man enough to come out and tell you exactly how he feels
2007-11-05 22:12:48 · answer #1 · answered by clark10clark 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He sounds needy.
Think back to when you split up before. Has he been out with other people? Maybe he realised that you were the best thing that happened to him.
But, after a year, how have you been doing without him? I'm guessing you have moved on.
He sounds like a bit of a bully with some of those messages.
He sounds as though he wants more than he letting on. The 'no relationship' is a smoke screen.
Be very careful on Friday. My thoughts are with you.
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I'm concerned at what Gem Gem has written. I don't believe that you ARE sending mixed messages, Tashami. He asked if you'd meet and you agreed. He's been plaguing you with texts since that first text. He has a problem. Don't let him make it your problem as well...
2007-11-05 22:16:02 · answer #2 · answered by Rob K 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he isn't 'over' you yet.
I had a similar situation with an ex who did the same thing, tracked me down (years later) then went on to tell me that I shouldn't get my hopes up because he's not interested in a relationship and so forth. This was totally out of the blue and uncalled for and I was just absolutely dumbfounded as to how and why he would be making such a call and telling me all this, especially as it was me who ended the relationship due to his infidelity.
It made me really angry at the time but in the end I just figured that he had told so many lies that he began to believe in his crap. In the end I told him in no uncertain terms to leave me alone and ignored all his calls. Eventually he stopped calling.
It sounds like you have a similar situation and if you're not interested, then I would just tell him goodbye or ignore his texts and so forth.
2007-11-05 22:19:43 · answer #3 · answered by Papooselet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A great way to get your ex back is https://tr.im/YJivs
They might realize they need you and come crawling back!
If you do get back together, don't let the same issues that destroyed your relationship crop up again. Have a good, long talk about how you're both going to make it right this time.
2015-01-29 00:33:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
And men think women are complicated lol. It sounds like you need to tell him exactly what you have told us. Ask him why he is being so weird. When you see him, have a good chat with him. Tell him that he was the one who got in contact with you. I think you are right to stay aloof though. He does sound like bad news, but what harm can come out of a couple of drinks. Just tell him what you have told us, and you never know, he might actually tell you whats going on in that little head of his. Unlikely, but worth a try lol. Good luck
2007-11-05 22:19:17 · answer #5 · answered by Notts Bubbles :) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Want to know how to get your ex back? Change yourself. Don't worry about changing other people, worry about changing yourself. Go to https://tr.im/SubaT
Once you do that then you can start to worry about getting back together with your ex, other wise you will find that you are fighting about all the same things and getting no where. Do what it takes and I promise things will work out in your favor.
The funny thing is I came to the realization that I had to change a little too late. After I was kicked out and after I was about to lose the only things that truly mattered to me - her love. A funny thing happens when we truly love someone and lose them. We do what ever it takes to get them back. For me I had to drop bad habits that had caused not only our relationship to sour but practically every other relationship I had had in the past. Not only with women, but with friends, co-workers, family, you name it.
Which is why I say to you as my ex at the time said to me, the only thing you can do is change yourself. Work on yourself and improve on the person that you already are. Drop the negative things in your life that don't belong there and you will see all of your relationships start to take off to new heights.
2016-04-26 02:06:22 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If these are "unwanted" advances or communications then "INFORM" your Ex to "cease and desist". If he does not comply Drop A Dime and report the individual. Simple as that.
I think he has some issues (psychological) that may be obsessive in nature. This a Post OJ Simpson world wake up girl!
2007-11-05 22:16:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all this guy has a, I can't make up my mind problem. And after the way he treated you. Why would you be
having drinks with him ?
Text him, " I'm eating large Friday, and not thirsty ", Find
someone you can text.
You can do better then afore mentioned. Be GOOD to
yourself.
2007-11-05 22:31:35 · answer #8 · answered by Bob Dylan ♪ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is keeping his options open till he see's you.
He maybe worried that you have changed and he won't be attracted to you anymore, so by telling you he doesn't want a relationship is his get out clause at the end off the date.
He is probably looking for a confidence boost, he wants you to chase him and because you are not he doesn't like.
I'd end the whole thing now before it gets more complicated.
He sounds like trouble to me.
Good Luck.
2007-11-05 22:17:48 · answer #9 · answered by Tanya M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hell to the no! DO NOT respond to his texts. He's either lonely or wanting something for you. He wants to see how much control he has over you or if you'll give in to his advances. Whatever the case a year of silence should continue on your part. Don't text him back. I would change my number if it were me.
2007-11-05 22:19:11 · answer #10 · answered by Kels 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like he still likes you and misses you, you didnt say why you split up in the first place but if it wa anything to do with commitmnt then that could be why he said what he did when you went for drinks, it sounds like he misses you and wants you back and the random texts might jut be because he can't think of anything to say and wants to talk 2 u, hope this helps
2007-11-05 22:18:46 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋