37 year old female. New to dating. Trying not to get "laid or burned"?

Question

Here's the question. I've been on lots of firsts and a few second dates.
What do ya do on the 3 and 4th. Guys what are your expectations of sex, making out, etc?How soon? How fast? If looking to turn it into a relationship? And not just a F**K, per se?

Answer 1

It depends on the person. Ask her open ended questions. Let her tell you how fast she wants this relationship to grow.

Answer 2

I am a lot older but my answer would be to have a real lasting relationship, wait until after you have a ring on your finger. If a guy doesn't respect you for that there is something wrong with him. You can pick out some of the losers by such things as knowing their body language or how to analyze their handwriting but if everyone seems to want sex on the 3rd or 4th date, perhaps you are looking for the guy who doesn't in the wrong places. I will give you some links here that may help pick the winners from the losers but it boils down to finding the person who is the other part of yourself and not settling for less until you find him.

Answer 3

It depends on the woman. When I was dating at your age I'd approach each date never looking to make out or have sex as I believe that it happens when it happens. Sadly a lot of my male contemporaries expect to get laid on the first or second date as do a lot of women.

If you're after a longer term relations it may be worth considering setting yourself a set of groundrules (guidelines) to dating such as no sex until the X or XX'th date. Be upfront about it and you'll find the jerks who are just after a bit of action will not be interested in dating you. It also helps a lot to have a clear idea of the sort of man you are interested in, in particular on the intellectual, emotional and ethical side of the coin. If need be draw up a checklist of what you need versus what you'd like. Remembering needs are essential things you can't live without, wants are qualities that would be nice but not always practical. eg: a male who is 6' plus, built like a God with a donkey's package and tongue like a frog.

One thing I would strongly advise you to go is google up STD's and their infection rates along with methods of keeping yourself safe.

Finally my dating sequence ..
1st date, formal, dinner or a cafe somewhere, a night at the opera or the theatre.

2nd date - less formal, a dinner date at a more intimate venue, preceeded by a more casual day out, the markets or sightseeing etc.

3rd date - The test of a woman's character. a BBQ with friends or a dinner party, depending on how things are progressing.

4th date: A night of astronomy, guaranteed to test the patience of most women to the limit, but hey they have to be able to deal with it if they want to be with me. 90% of women drop out on this date.

5th date: Depends on the woman, previous things I've done include flying the woman in question for a dinner date in another state, breakfast at sunrise on the beach and a candle-lit dinner for two in Paris which I did for my current g/f.

Answer 4

There is no time limit on sex it is not a race.
You will know when the time is right,just be careful and protect yourself,why complicate things with sex while getting in to a new relationship.
I guess im kinda old being 46 but i know not to push it on a woman,when she is ready you both will know.
It could be a week or a year who knows.
Just have fun in life and enjoy being alive and well,some of us have medical problems and wish they had a lifetime left but sometimes a lifetime gets cut short.
Go out and see the world while you can and enjoy every day like it's your last.

Answer 5

Music Mama:

Usually, most men just wish to get Laid!
(1st, 2nd, or 3rd date)

Most women are concerned about~
Establishing "Relationships"! Oh boy!

Personally~
If I like a woman, I'll ask her out again!
If she is really HOT, I am interested.
If there is no romance being established~
I loose interest after awhile.

It's hard to generalize about.
There are many variables.

You're 37! You should know that most
people want to have fun & make love!

Why are you concerned about getting
burned before you even go dating?

Just enjoy yourself!
You are an adult! Go for it mama!

PS: I live in Hollywood, CA~
gimme a hit on MySpace
ledheadbev

Answer 6

honey why do u want a man to set the pace???

its all up to what u feel comfortable with, usually on 3rd dates the kissing and heavy petting starts, but u can hold off with the sex until u comfortable.

just learn to figure out what and how u want things, and don't get upset when it doesn't turn out that way, u will learn

Answer 7

You're 37 and trying not to get laid? Honey you better get laid all you can. It's time to quit playing games and find a man who you are compatible with and gives it like you want it. By the way, I'm available : )

Answer 8

Don't give yourself away even if it is your 10th date. Don't do anything you don't feel comfortable about doing and make sure you make that clear to the guy you are dating. If he really is into you he will gladly wait and enjoy getting to know you first. If he is out for sex, you will know fairly quickly. Respect yourself and never lie to yourself. Things will work out just fine.

Answer 9

I would say by the 4th or 5th date, at 37 a guy is expecting sex or something close to it. He wont think your a sl*t its normal to give it up by then :) Enjoy

Answer 10

I try and *** the first night, but if connection is there its mostly within an hour of meeting, and if no connection maybe after the 3rd or 4th date.