Hes much older than me ,im 25, my cousin-he is 50,hes married, no kids. im starting my career, i never had much to do with him, he lived 5 hours away, was never friendly or tried to get to know me, just one of those fake family members who you see only x-mas, thanksgivng. I tried being friendly by sending him friendly emails, no response. Asked him to call me when he watches a movie i reccomennded, he says"oh your phone is always busy" i say leave a message, he sayd "oh",, offered him , his wife and their 12 yr old niece free tickets and backstage passes to justin timberlake show,, his 12 yr old niece told me she loves justin timberlake so i offered..
i never got a reply back..then i asked him what happened, he says"oh it was too far"
(I told them earlier i could arrange since my bfrnd works in entertainment biz, they said "oh yes wed love that")
I also brought him really nice christmas gifts every year, last year he said "why r u buying me nice gifts"? I said well i know what u like, he said "umm but still why"?
So now i got a new job in a great position, he asked me last i saw him "hows work", I said great mentioned my new job and all the traveling im doing now"
He didnt smile, he says "Well what r u doing when u travel"? I explain to him, then he says very stern INTIMADATING WAY "Umm are traveling to Washington too"? I said no just LA,
I thought it was weird question, then he stares me down and says nothing.
Now my Mom says he called her and wants to know the exact street I work on and she told him.
Whats up with him? and weird? rude?
the reason i was friendly is cause my Mom says hes so nice and her fav nephew, thought maybe there was something wrong with me, so i reached out to him
i think she doesnt know him well
Im feeling really stupid and disrespected by him
2007-11-05 10:35:30 · 6 answers · asked by tbo 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
well when i have said i cant make it for thanksgiving he was hysterical and said it wouldnt be the same without me, coaxed me into going for an hour.
at x-mas when i was going to sepnd it away he wrote a letter saying how upset he is and wont be same without me
does this sound like someone that wants me to bugg off?
2007-11-05 12:01:43 · update #1
he seems to be giving mixed messages. it seems like he's brushing you off but then he says he wants to see you at family parties. If he's overdoing it and his letter of wanting to see you at party is exaggerated then he is trying to cover up he doesn't want to see you. or he may be jealous of you for reasons unknown to you. so either he is jealous or doesn't like you for some unknown reason. you can confront him but that doesn't mean he will tell the truth.
2007-11-05 16:56:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe this is emotional abuse as such. Abuse tends to involve those closer to you and is usually related to control and jealousy.
From what you have said, I would expect that you are feeling very hurt and rejected. It's natural to feel this way when somebody treats you like that. But the advantage of the relationship you have with this cousin is that you can choose to stop contacting him at any time. In the end you can't force someone to like you or want to be close to you and there are some seriously weird people in the world. You seem to be very approval-seeking but seriously, do you WANT such an idiot to be a big part of your life, and does it MATTER that he doesn't respect you?
He obviously has his own problems and buying presents is not going to make them go away. Buy yourself some new shoes, you'll feel better :)
2007-11-05 10:46:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't use the term emotional abuse. I'd say he's probably got some issues of his own and doesn't know how to relate to you.
Or maybe he's just a jerk.
I wonder why he's so interested in Washington, and your exact employment address. That's pretty weird.
Maybe you should tell your mother how uncomfortable this last exchange made you, and ask her not to share information about you with him. Then I'd stop getting him gifts and trying to accommodate him, like the tickets. A little distance might really help this relationship.
2007-11-05 11:00:38 · answer #3 · answered by Debdeb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He wants to lower your self-esteem & self-confidence so he can take advantage of you..You're probably an attractive young woman at 25, so don't associate with him. Blood or not, he sounds like a perverted creep who's just trying to get in your pants!!
2015-12-10 13:04:34 · answer #4 · answered by Beverly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As I was reading, all I read was "What I did" I called, I gave him this, I sent emails I, I, I, . My question is WHY? He was showing from the start that he was not interested in any thing you were doing and did not appreciate it.
So with out being rude what did you want him to say "Bugger off"
2007-11-05 11:50:51 · answer #5 · answered by debbri48 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The word tease comes to mind forget about him and get on with your life girl
2007-11-05 10:46:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋