So I have been seeing this guy for a couple months now. We get along great, but he has recently confessed to me that he is an alcoholic and is trying to get away from drinking, and told me that he wants to change his life around. Which is all fine and dandy, but at the end of the day, he still chooses alcohol over me. I know this is a red flag and that I shouldn't get anymore involved, but I'm already involved and it sucks. He will go days without calling me and then when he does call he apologizes, makes me feel sorry for him, and then tells me that he's in love with me. So of course, I give in and give him another chance, but then it happens again. He's had 3 strikes. I haven't heard from him in 3 days, so I wrote him an email telling him that I didn't want to see him anymore. Was this the right thing to do? Should I try to contact him and see whats going on? I hate it because I really like him, when he's sober. What should I do?
2007-11-05 06:32:27 · 18 answers · asked by Ray Ray 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
leave, alcoholics need more than weak promises, he needs rehab and YOU deserve better.
2007-11-05 06:36:08 · answer #1 · answered by Angelbaby7 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't dump him when a man is like this and drunk all the time that is when they need a possitive influence on them. I saw a show called intervention. It is very good it is all about really bad addicts have there family go and talk to an intervenist and go to rehab and get straight it is a really good show and it is on A&E. If you get that channel then watch an episode and call the number at the end so you can get help for him. If you decide not to go that route then fine but I must warn you that my ex was an alchohoic and he was extremly abussive. If you get the feeling he's drunk and angry I would step away from him. Do atleast try my way because I would say 95% of the people do get better and do get clean.
2007-11-05 14:41:11 · answer #2 · answered by Forever The Sickest Me 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No man should EVER put anything above you or your feelings, because if he really loves you, he wouldn't want to. You need to break up with him, because apparently, alcohol is more important than you. Alcoholics also tend to become abusive, so you need to get out of that relationship. There is a man out there who will treat you better than your boyfriend. Don't give him any more chances. Move on.
2007-11-05 14:41:38 · answer #3 · answered by Michelle 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The fact that you are even asking this question to a bunch of strangers should be a big hint that you don't want/need him in your life.
There are plenty of other men who you will love and that can be there for you - emotionally and physically. Don't waste another minute on this guy.
2007-11-05 14:36:33 · answer #4 · answered by crazymugal 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it was the right thing to do, but if you do end up back with him again, make him choose.. I don't think it's a hard choice, plus he said he needs to get away from it, so you can support him on that.. If it happens again, get out and find someone who would want you..
2007-11-05 14:37:26 · answer #5 · answered by crazgrss 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you do care and want to keep him around let him know you would be happy to go to an aa meeting or such with him. When he is ready to stop, he will have a person not judging him and only there as support. Take it from there...
2007-11-05 14:44:07 · answer #6 · answered by j p 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
do u love him that much that you are you willing to be with him till he gets over his alcoholism? if you are, are you sure? ask yourself 10x before you commit. it will not be easy.
is he signed up to some sort of rehab or program to help him deal with it?
he is a victim of alcoholism. you are 2nd on his list, after alcohol. yes you 2 get along great, but his relationship with alcohol is greater than yours.
2007-11-05 14:40:28 · answer #7 · answered by smith 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
YOU DID THE RIGHT THING BY ENDDING IT I AM SOBER 16 YEARS HE NEEDS A REHAB THEN A.A. IF HE TELLS YOU HES TRYING YOU CANT TRY TO STOP IT WONT WORK YOU HAVE TO STOP. HE CANT STOP FOR NOBODY BUT HIM SELF NOT FOR YOU . DONT TAKE HIM BACK NO MATTER WHAT HE TELLS YOU TRUST ME I BEEN THERE. GO ON WITH YOUR LIFE AND CUT HIM LOSE
2007-11-05 23:19:06 · answer #8 · answered by master 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get into therapy and find out why you are having trouble making such an obvious choice to avoid continuing to be involved with someone who is such a high risk for making your life miserable.
screw you thumbs down bozos - personality types who are attracted to alcoholics and others who are time bombs in their lives often make disastersous choices over and over again. Stick your thumbs somewhere else.
2007-11-05 14:36:42 · answer #9 · answered by dhdaddy2003 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
you did the right thing you dont want to get messed up with an alcoholic he says he want to get help but he never does it over intill he get over his addiction
2007-11-05 14:37:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋