If your own sibling/child did not have anything to do with your mom for 3 years should they come around now?

Question

So my question is If you do not have nothing to do with anyone for so many years while they are in good health then should they be coming around when your in bad health?
And if someone chose their husband/wife over their own mother should they even come around?
What do you think?

I am not saying that the mom told them to choose -me or your husband-

She chose her husband and listened to her husband to not have anything to do with our family and now that our mom is sick, now she wants to come around, she has not been around in the last three years when our mom was sick and in good times.
If you knew how her husband talked to our mom and how our sister took off running after her "man" it would sicken you.

I have never chose anyone over my mom and i would never do that.

I don't get it why would you come around in bad times when you weren't there before for the longest time before things got bad.

She had 3 years, how long do you need to make things right and to call someone on the phone or to speak to them out in a store.
Remember Our mom did nothing to our older sister, all she done was tell my sisters husband to get off her property because he got right up in her face cussing our mom out for no good reason.

Answer 1

Sometimes it takes a crisis in the family to make people appreciate their family.No one can undo the past but you can take control of today.I understand that it is difficult to accept that your sister has not been in your lives for 3 years.I can't tell you what to do but I can tell you what I would do.When there is a crisis in the family, such as poor health of a parent, you will find strength through each other.If your sister wants to be a part of your life and your mom's then i would welcome her back.Most parents love their children inspite of their flaws.We love our kids because they are a part of us.When my dad was dying he told us ( my 4 brothers and my 3 sisters) to love our mom and to be good to each other.He knew we weren't perfect but he knew the value of family.I think the worst thing in life would be to live with the regret of not doing the right thing.I hope everything will be all right with your mom.You never think of your parents getting older or sick.It is a confusing and frightening situation, I've been there with both my parents.You will all find comfort and strength in each other during this time . Try to look after yourself at this time as well, it is easy to become overwhelmed by everything.I hope everything works out with your mom.Take it one day at a time,it's easier to handle that way.Take care.

Answer 2

My daughter chose her "man?" over me. The last time I saw her was 2or3 years when she needed a bed for my granddaughter. She said she'd bring my GD by now that she knows where I live..Haven't seen her since. When my sister asked her how I was she laughed and said "I don't even have that ..@#tches phone number. This is the oldest one who I keep her baby's daddy out of jail for, let them live w/me and my youngest on my Lil social security so she could graduate high school, made her leave once cause she disrespected me and the youngest...and let them All come back when they needed to.....I move out cause that many people in a large one bedroom had my nerves shot. I love her to death..but I don;t like her, and I think keeping my grand kids away from me is hurtful to them and me not that she cares. I'm very ill...terminal but refuse to tell anyone in my family...because if they have chosen not to see me it's on them..I surely don't want or need their pitty. So, I guess my answer is only go around if you want to and miss the person...if u don't miss them being a part of ur life..leave it alone..cause the person will know why you're coming around..to make yourself feel better not the other person.

Answer 3

First of all you should never make ur child choose between u and the love of their life. Thats the most selfish thing u could ever do. So u were in the wrong maybe they needed a break from you in-laws are pains!!!! Suck it up get over it if u want to see them then do it if not then dont.!

Answer 4

Yes, I think you should give them a chance to make peace with each other, it's never to late for a good thing to happen especially when someone is in ill health, it could make them feel better even if for only a short while even. Like they say "Give peace a chance"
I hope everything goes very well.

Answer 5

It is never too late to make things right when that person is still alive. Although it may be wrong because that person walked out on them years ago, that person can still genuinely care about that person and want the best for them. I think people should give people a chance to redeem themselves.

Afterall, WWJD?

Answer 6

i think if they are genuinely upset and want to make peace between each other then you should give them a chance but if you know from previous incidents that they are just gonna be there for a while and then leave then you shouldn't let them come any were near you.

Answer 7

Well, if the person was terminally ill, I would think tht they are only there to suck up or get his or her name on the will, but if they were ill and could still recover then they want to patch things up. It depends on the person's intentions. If you know that person will and you know what their intentions may be.

Answer 8

Showing up when someone is in bad health....they're wanting an inheritance.

Answer 9

Life is too short, kiss and make up, at least give the opportunity...