This is going to sound weird, but here goes: When I walk into a store or restaurant or even at my desk at work, I start to feel uncomfortable. I feel a little nervous and look around and wonder how I'm perceived by others. I wonder how my expression looks. Do I look angry, sad, happy, etc. I guess this might stem from my having a low self-esteem. I think I'm a decent looking person, but sometimes when I look at photos of myself I think oh gosh I'm not the most photogenic person in the world and that makes me feels self-conscious. I have a hard time just letting go, getting lost in the moment, concentrate on the task at hand, and not worrying what others think of me. How can I do this? How can I raise my self-esteem so I can be confident? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much.
2007-11-05 05:58:16 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
I have felt like that before. Actually I have lived most of my life like that. I have some tools that have helped me to almost completly overcome those issues. I have no idea what people are thinking of. So, why do I always assume the negative. If I were to read peoples minds, I would find out that they very seldom if ever thought negative things about me. I also found it to be very, very helpful when I began to quit judging others. When I judge others, I live in fear of being judged. I used to think that because I judged people, then everyone must be constantly judging me. People weren't as judgemental as I thought. These thing will play on my self-esteem. When I focus on the negative, that is all I will see is negative things, But when I focus on the positive, then all I begin to see is positive things. When I change my perception, my life begins to change. It takes time and practice. But go slow and cut yourself some slack. Remember, what any one thinks about me is none of my business. Also try reading books by Eckhard Tolle or Miguel Ruiz
2007-11-05 07:20:37 · answer #1 · answered by Marty G 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I used to have that same problem. you walk into a room, feel like everyone's staring at you, If someone's laughing you think they're laughing at you, If someones talking, you think there talking sh** about you. I wish I could give you some great advice to help you overcome it, but I'm not sure how I did it, or if I even am really over it. Best advice: when you walk into a room, store, building, whatever, don't look around at everyone else to see if they're looking at you. Just do your own thing, and do what you gotta do, and make you're breathing deep breathes, because the first sign of an anxiety attack is shallowed breathing.
2007-11-05 12:10:38 · answer #2 · answered by BEEASTLY BUFFALO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear what you say but you know its a healthy sign that you know you are doing this.
We all have an internal dialogue. Thats what this is called.
I remember being in therapy years ago and the therapist asked me about this and I was so shocked! How did he know I spoke to myself this way!!
Internal dialogue is normal but when its like a monkey on your back whispering negativity in your ear it starts to become a problem!
You are bright and articulate and I'm thinking you have a lot going for you - maybe its tricky for you to see it now. You can improve this with a little self work and therapy will help - cognitive behavioural specifically would be best.
I can recommend moodgym.au as a web site that can help you.
Good luck
2007-11-05 06:37:55 · answer #3 · answered by Sunshine Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Lady Angel, I hope that you find the help ad suggestions you need here. I have a problem similar to you, I don't like to be in public, or even around ppl I know sometimes!
I feel like I am different in a way that everyone can see, and look at!
I also don't feel that my photos show the best of me. And I really don't like very many pictures of me at all.
Something that I have to do on a regular basis is to remind myself that everyone has faults, and shortcomings. Not only ME. That the things that I feel, and experience, are not unique to ME.
I have to get out of myself, and try to relate to to thers more. OR I get stuck in myself, and become this selfish person that only sees myself, and no one wants to be around me when I am like that.
So try it, put yourself into someone else's shoes, and see that you are not the only person to ever feel this way, or have theses insecurities!! It will help in the long run, you may need therapy to start with.
Lots of luck, and warmest wishes!!
2007-11-05 06:19:25 · answer #4 · answered by Tonia M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
One day do or wear something that will grab attention then you'll see that you wont feel as bad as you do when you're being yourself... I'm the same too I don't like being close to people because I'm afraid they might point out my insecurities maybe its the same for you
2007-11-05 06:08:20 · answer #5 · answered by Chips 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you probably have a social anxiety disorder springing from you poor self esteem. You might benefit from some cognitive behavioral therapy.
2007-11-05 06:02:55 · answer #6 · answered by essentiallysolo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like a bit of anxiety. don't worry many of us suffer, me included. you could start with therapy, or just see a psych.
good luck, i hope you can overcome this.
2007-11-05 06:15:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋