Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to God's kids. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said was, "Don't."
"Don't what?" Adam replied. "Don't eat the forbidden fruit," God said. Forbidden fruit? We got forbidden fruit? Hey, Eve...we got forbidden fruit!"
"No way!"
"Way!"
"Don't eat that fruit!" said God.
"Why?"
"Because I am your Father and I said so!" said God (wondering why he hadn't stopped after making the elephants). A few minutes later God saw his kids having an apple break and was angry. "Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.
"Uh huh, " Adam replied.
"Then why did you?"
"I dunno" Eve answered.
"She started it!" Adam said.
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"DID NOT!"
Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed. If God had trouble handling children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?
2007-11-05 05:23:34 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
ROTFLMBO
(rolling on the floor laughing my butt off.)
HeeeehoooohuuuuuuuuuuhaaaaaaaaaaheeeeeeeeehaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaheeeeeeeeeeeeeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(controls myself)
that was very funny.
: D
; D
2007-11-05 05:33:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
The Pope and the Queen of England are on the same stage at an Anglican and Catholic commemoration of the Anglo-Irish accords - the crowd is huge - thousands. Her Majesty and His Holiness can't help but have a little rivalry - both being heads of churches and all.
The Queen says to the Pope, "Did you know that with just one little wave of my hand I can make every English person in the crowd go wild?" He doubts it, so she shows him. Sure enough, the royal-gloved wave elicits rapture and cheering from every Englishman in the crowd.
Gradually, the cheering subsides. The Pope, not wanting to be outdone by someone wearing a worse frock and hat than he, considers what he could do. So the Pope says to the Queen,"Your Majesty, that was impressive. But did you know that with one little wave of MY hand I can make every Irish person in the crowd go crazy with joy? Their joy will not be a momentary display like that of your subjects, but will go deep into their hearts, and they will speak forever of this day and rejoice - they will recount it to their grandchildren and they to their descendants.
The Queen seriously doubts this, and says so. "One little wave of your hand and all Irish people will rejoice forever? Show me." So the Pope slapped her.
2007-11-05 05:27:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 8⤊ 0⤋
Personally I think Adam was nagged and guilt-tripped into eating the apple by Eve.
"Want the rest of this apple, Adam?"
"No thanks."
"Oh great, so what am I supposed to do now? You want me to finish this on my own? And get fat? Is that what you want? After all I do for you! I just asked you to eat the rest of this apple and you don't care about me! And another thing..."
"Fine, FINE, I'll eat the damn apple!"
2007-11-05 05:33:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
LOL i cant % i like all of them!!!! haha the only with the two muslims on the airplane...ive heard that one formerly, despite the fact that it replaced right into a Catholic nun that advised them to pass to hell extremely cuz they have been speaking abt catholics, and so on and so on =D =( i rly cant % a favourite LOL yet i like the 1st one cuz it has the expertise kya, that's for some reason my fave be conscious. kya hua? my fave frase xp
2016-10-15 03:16:34 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cute,
I think gods # 1 punishment was pain
childbirth pain for eve.
2007-11-05 05:41:29 · answer #5 · answered by jeanniep 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny!
2007-11-05 05:31:21 · answer #6 · answered by Kiwi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If god was omnipotent then he would have known it beforehand.
And since he put the tree there in the first place, it's his fault.
Of course, this is all mythology and has nothing to do with reality.
2007-11-05 05:29:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
That's funny....sounds like Bill Cosby!
2007-11-05 05:39:32 · answer #8 · answered by FUNdie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No parent worthy of the title would roast his children in the oven for misbehaving -- I don't care WHAT the kid did....
2007-11-05 05:30:50 · answer #9 · answered by The Reverend Soleil 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
cute :)
2007-11-05 05:29:40 · answer #10 · answered by tightest embrace 0:) 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋