We have an argument at least once a week. Mostly it's for no good reason. I feel like he wants to get mad and needs drama in his life. He got mad at me yesterday and I explained to him that I didn’t actually do anything wrong, and since he couldn’t be mad at me any more, he chose a different approach to have some drama. He began crying. I was like, what’s wrong? He didn’t want to tell me because he beg him, and then he told me that his mom is being mistreated by his dad. Whatever he told me wasn’t a reason to cry over. I knew him for a while, and now I totally can see that he just looks for reasons to get mad or upset over. Could it be because he is craving for my attention? Each time he was sad, his mom would baby him and freak out that something is wrong. She would worry so much and I think that he misses that. He wants me to freak out about it to and baby him, but I don’t want to. His is not a baby but an adult. Am I misinterpreting his behavior? How should I handle his it?
2007-11-05 05:04:44 · 5 answers · asked by butterfly-sweetypie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
This sounds like depression. Is he showing these other signs of depression as well? If so, encourage him to get help by either seeing a counselor or seeing his doctor.
Depression
MILD
Lack of motivation
Low self esteem
Feeling tired
Isolating self - not seeing friends or family
Sleeping too much
Feeling sad or blue most days
Thoughts of wanting to die from illness
MODERATE
Losing sleep
Losing appetite
Losing hope
Thoughts of suicide with no intent
Feeling helpless, trapped
Having problems concentrating and/or making decisions
SEVERE
Feel hopeless and helpless
Thoughts of suicide become obsessive
Can be self destructive or self defeating
Thoughts of suicide with intent
2007-11-05 05:16:18 · answer #1 · answered by brighterdayscounseling 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be a couple things. It could be that he is wanting attention from you. It could be that he is feeling guilty about something he did. It could be that he is having an affair and looking for a way to get angry so he can leave the house to go be with another woman? Whatever it is he needs some help and you are doing the right thing by not babying him, sounds like he needs to grow up.
2007-11-05 13:15:00 · answer #2 · answered by loseit 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to get some counseling to help him deal with that. If his mother was being mistreated by the dad for any length of time, he may have never had a good male role model in his life. Perhaps if the two of you can got counseling it will be possible for him to learn to handle his emotions better and even that there is no need for drama in your relationship like there was with his mom and dad. Good luck to you with this.
2007-11-05 13:17:06 · answer #3 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are two really good books, both by John Bradshaw ... Healing the Shame that Binds You and Family Secrets ... that address behavior like this. Basically, it could be a learned behavior (if he was closer to his mother, he may behave in ways that she behaved in stressful situations) and he is dealing with these situations in the only way he knows how; or he it could be narcissistic tendencies in which he wants his own needs met and can't or won't consider the needs of others; or if we've been traumatized as a child and our adult world is too peaceful so we reinact the trauma we experienced as a child to feel "safe". In any event, it sounds as though he could use therapy, and one of John Bradshaw's books could help you understand his actions.
2007-11-05 13:15:08 · answer #4 · answered by Patti 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him it's time to grow up.
2007-11-05 13:08:23 · answer #5 · answered by cooter726 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋