What should I do about my next door neighbor?

Question

She is driving me nuts.She stops me whenever she sees me out playing with my youngest son,doing yardwork,etc...and tells me all about her new 'things'--car,carpeting,front door,windows,sofa,etc.The list goes on and on.I am a struggling single mom who can't afford anything new,and she knows that.The most irritating thing of all is that she is a 'born again' Christian who wants me to go to her church.I thought she was not supposed to be materialistic if she had 'been saved'.The last time she told me about her new stuff,I said simply,"Congratulations...now I have to go visit my sick dad in the hospital."...and walked away.She did not get the hint,however,and continues her SH!T!!

Answer 1

Appeal to her Christian side and just say "Look, I'm really glad that you are doing so well, but hearing about your success grates on me as I'm having a hard time of it at the moment. Please don't talk about your wonderful life!"

Maybe then she'll get the point....

p.s. hope your dad gets better soon...

Answer 2

Hello Sunshine.

When my children were small I had a friend who was very well off. We made friends at antenatal group and for a while it was great.

Anything I ever had at that time was from Charity shops, but I was very creative and so made my house pretty, which I enjoyed. Then this friend started coming round, and she honestly copied everything I did. She was rolling in dosh and at that time 17 years ago her husband was on about 500 quid a week. We were struggling. It made me jealous becaue she could so easily just buy what silly things I had created, and I had to try so hard to make ends meet. Mind you at least she wasn't interested in my Mr B. She is actually now married to the husband of one of the other ladies in the group.

I was jealous at her, she was her trying to fill her life with everything everyone else had that made her feel more fulfilled. And I as a christian SHOULD NOT have been jealous because jealousy isn't good for the soul. If Christians were perfect we wouldn't need Jesus. Don't expect her to be perfect.

She will no doubt have a reason for her behaviour. And if I was you I would be honest with her. Tell her that the constant showing off makes you feel bad. I don't like show offs lol (oooo imperfection again)(she may have no idea) The fact is that we have to cope with these sorts of people in life. No one is better. And playing with your children and spending time with them is worth a million new cars.

Answer 3

The woman's a clod. Take steps to minimize your time with her.

She's the type that wants attention, so if you're giving her even a perfunctory, "Oh, how nice" when she mentions new things, stop doing so. If you're outside and she starts cataloging her new acquisitions, resume what you were doing and just give her a toneless "uh huh" a few times -- don't give her the satisfaction of attention.

Alternatively, you could tell a lie and give her food for thought. The next time she starts blathering about her new stuff, you could reply, "That's wonderful that you keep getting new stuff. I used to do that too, but decided not to live so extravagantly -- so now I give the money to charities. Have you ever thought of doing that?" Say it with warmth and sincerity, and watch her sputter. She'll probably want to say, "Well, THAT'S a stupid idea," but of course knows she can't.

And if she continues trying to draft her to attend her church, just tell her you're Jewish and think it would be better if she went to temple with you.

Answer 4

I know people should be happy for what other people have, but she sounds like she wants to show boat about what she has. Just tell her that you have a lot going on in your life and really don't want to discuss her happy life when you are going through so much. Either that or when you see her, tell her you are a little busy every time she begins to talk. If she doesn't get the picture after a while, then I don't know what to say.

Answer 5

eewww, sounds like you moved next door to my old boss.
You know, I have a really good way of blowing people off but it's kind of rude. And I really do not want to advise on rude because who knows, somewhere along the road you may need somebody to talk to. Or have an emergency and Braggy McChristian might be you're only savior.....ha ha no pun intended.

Somebody up here posted something about her life being empty and therefore jealous of yours. Could be true you know, she might be all alone and doesn't really know how to talk to people. She might not realize her bragging is offending you.

Right now your mind is on your Dad and you can tell her that. Hey sorry I can't talk, got loads on my mind because of Dad, talk to you later. Avoid her, if you see her coming go inside your house and make it obvious. Or you can turn the tables on her and just go on and on about all the new things your son is doing.

Or just get a dog and train it to bark at her.........allot.

Answer 6

There's a girl at my work who does the same thing!! It's sooo annoying!! I told her I didn't get anything for Mothers day and she went on and on about all the things her family bought for her that wasn't enough OH no she went on about how they took her out to dinner 2 bouquets of flowers blah blah blah..... I just say I got to go!! Short and sweet !! Some people can be sooo ignorant !! There's not much else you can do about it other than to run away every time you see her coming she might get the hint or maybe not!! LOL

Answer 7

Oh my gosh she'd drive me insane.
You seem like a nice person (and im not saying that for the 10 points)
And I bet you just want her to stop bragging, im afriad theres always going to be someone like her in your life, we all have that someone who brags about everything.

She should take a look at the Bible closley, because your right she shouldn't be so materlistic.

I think you should avoid her, I know its not nice avoiding people especially ones who are in your face 24/7 But thats all you can do. She seems like a person who actually gets a kick out of someone feeling down, i dont think shes nasty but she seems to like to think that shes so fortunate.

I think you should explain that your sick of her bragging, and tell her how you feel, as much as it takes a lot of guts to do, at least a weigh will of come off your sholders when she knows what a pain she really is been.

Sorry if I didnt give you good advise, but its really hard tackling the neighbours im having trouble with mine at the moment.

Answer 8

Next time she is telling you her long list of crap repeat whatever she says but exagerate: for example she says "Oh im going on vacation to NY" and start blabbing about how great her trip is to rub it in your face then say "really i am going to the moon i got in the list it took me like 3 years but i'll be going on next year with Madonna isn't that great" and go on exaggerating, make it sound ridiculous so she gets the point to stop telling her crap to you. That should get her to stop. Also don't pay to much attention to she obivously has low self-esteem and thinks by being supposedly a Christian and having all this stuff makes her a better person cause she really hates who she is inside... But yeah whatever she says do it back to her in a ridiculous matter...

Answer 9

maybe she wants to talk to or have some sort of conversation with you and doesn't know what to say. you might want to just tell her that it really bothers you that she continues to tell you of her new things when you are struggling not that you want her help but if she really wants to talk to you talk about something else. she may get her feeling hurt but she needs to know. just because she is a christian doesn't mean she is perfect. so in a kind way i would let her know how she makes you feel. don't hold it in and then explode on her. just tell her that you are glad that she gets these wonderful things but it isn't right that she continue to boast as you might say about it to you.
remember to kind it always makes the impact of what you want easier.

Answer 10

If I were you, I would tell her that I'm happy that she has all this new stuff, but as you're a single mum and trying to do the best you can, it hurts you a little that she mentions it continuously. If she still doesn't get it, just ignore her. It's a hard situation to handle, I wish you the best of luck!

Answer 11

A Born Again Christian eh? Study this from Matthew 6. Maybe give her a copy...

The second part is for you. x

19 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 “But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; 21 for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
22 “The eye is the lamp of the body; so then if your eye is clear, your whole body will be full of light. 23 “But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light that is in you is darkness, how great is the darkness!
24 “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.

The Cure for Anxiety

25 “For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 “Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? 27 “And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? 28 “And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, 29 yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. 30 “But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith! 31 “Do not worry then, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear for clothing?’ 32 “For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. 33 “But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
34 “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.